Slowly, but surely...
Old & Sober Member of AA
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Nursing Home in Brick, New Jersey
Posts: 5,174
Slowly, but surely...
I'm catching up to the number of years I drank...32 years...longer than many of you have been alive.
My name is Rae, and I'm an alcoholic. Today marks 29 years since I took my last drink. And, it wasn't even a drink...more like a quick gulp, before my 16 year old daughter grabbed the glass and bottle out of my hands and poured the wine down the sink. Back to the detox/rehab where I had been just four months before.
So, what was different this time!?! It was done exactly the way anyone here should achieve good, solid sobriety...one day at a time...the days became weeks...the weeks turned into months...the months into years...and, so on.
Number 1 - I didn't get involved in any emotionally charged romantic entanglements, which seriously detracted from my recovery the first time around.
Second - I concentrated on recovery, recovery, recovery, which included joining a home group, getting a sponsor, being a very active member of AA...from setting up/breaking down meetings, making coffee, going out on speaking commitments (first for support, until I once again had three months sober), and doing service work.
Third - I made a meeting every single day...sometimes two a day, if I could get to a lunchtime meeting near work. It wasn't unusual for me to make two - three meetings on Saturdays and Sundays. I once wondered if it was possible to make too many meetings...I don't think there is such a thing as too many!
Last, but very important - I got involved in every fun/social AA activity being run by the local groups. My prior "social life" consisted of bar-hopping...so, now I became a "meeting hopper". I seriously needed the comraderie of the members. The meetings after the meetings...sitting for hours over coffee at a diner...was something I looked forward to.
When I celebrated my 20th AA Anniversary, one of the other celebrants was asked how he had managed to stay sober for 25 years. He answered, "Don't drink, make meetings, and don't die." A very simple message, but one I'll bet Big Bill is still giving as he celebrates his 34th year.
Being in a nursing home now, I don't make f2f meetings anymore, and I really miss the people I got to know over the 25 years of regular meetings. SR has filled the gap, but it can never be quite the same. Like my daughter says, "It is what it is."
It's customary, at least in North Jersey, for the celebrants to take turns each year picking someone to speak at the Anniversary Meeting. On my 20th, I asked Jim M., a man with a very inspiring story and someone who was respected and admired by all of us. Jim always closed his sharing in the same way, "If you are looking for sobriety, I pray that you find it. If you have found sobriety, I pray that you keep it."
And, that is exactly what I hope for all of you. Thanks for letting me share.
My name is Rae, and I'm an alcoholic. Today marks 29 years since I took my last drink. And, it wasn't even a drink...more like a quick gulp, before my 16 year old daughter grabbed the glass and bottle out of my hands and poured the wine down the sink. Back to the detox/rehab where I had been just four months before.
So, what was different this time!?! It was done exactly the way anyone here should achieve good, solid sobriety...one day at a time...the days became weeks...the weeks turned into months...the months into years...and, so on.
Number 1 - I didn't get involved in any emotionally charged romantic entanglements, which seriously detracted from my recovery the first time around.
Second - I concentrated on recovery, recovery, recovery, which included joining a home group, getting a sponsor, being a very active member of AA...from setting up/breaking down meetings, making coffee, going out on speaking commitments (first for support, until I once again had three months sober), and doing service work.
Third - I made a meeting every single day...sometimes two a day, if I could get to a lunchtime meeting near work. It wasn't unusual for me to make two - three meetings on Saturdays and Sundays. I once wondered if it was possible to make too many meetings...I don't think there is such a thing as too many!
Last, but very important - I got involved in every fun/social AA activity being run by the local groups. My prior "social life" consisted of bar-hopping...so, now I became a "meeting hopper". I seriously needed the comraderie of the members. The meetings after the meetings...sitting for hours over coffee at a diner...was something I looked forward to.
When I celebrated my 20th AA Anniversary, one of the other celebrants was asked how he had managed to stay sober for 25 years. He answered, "Don't drink, make meetings, and don't die." A very simple message, but one I'll bet Big Bill is still giving as he celebrates his 34th year.
Being in a nursing home now, I don't make f2f meetings anymore, and I really miss the people I got to know over the 25 years of regular meetings. SR has filled the gap, but it can never be quite the same. Like my daughter says, "It is what it is."
It's customary, at least in North Jersey, for the celebrants to take turns each year picking someone to speak at the Anniversary Meeting. On my 20th, I asked Jim M., a man with a very inspiring story and someone who was respected and admired by all of us. Jim always closed his sharing in the same way, "If you are looking for sobriety, I pray that you find it. If you have found sobriety, I pray that you keep it."
And, that is exactly what I hope for all of you. Thanks for letting me share.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Rae))) - WOW, congratulations on a whole lot of one-day-at-a-times!
You are truly an inspiration to me...always upbeat, supportive of everyone, and I absolutely love your sense of humor. I count on you, each holiday, to bring a smile to my face. Your last year Christmas thread, is one of my all time favorites.
Thank you for being you....you are one heckuva lady!!!
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
You are truly an inspiration to me...always upbeat, supportive of everyone, and I absolutely love your sense of humor. I count on you, each holiday, to bring a smile to my face. Your last year Christmas thread, is one of my all time favorites.
Thank you for being you....you are one heckuva lady!!!
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Fort Wayne IN
Posts: 284
Ray, Thanks for a wonderful story. When I started sobriety I could not figure out why people with long periods of sobriety still went to meetings. It was months before I understood. Today, I am so grateful for the people like yourself that continue to give and support us in early sobriety and longafter. Anyone that is referred to as an "old timer" in my AA communittee is honored and I look at them with high esteem.
You are a great inspiration!
You are a great inspiration!
Old & Sober Member of AA
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Nursing Home in Brick, New Jersey
Posts: 5,174
Originally Posted by Toomutch 
Thank you for the beautiful share Rae. You are an inspiration to me, and you have sooo much wisdom.
Congratulations on 29 Years!
Congratulations on 29 Years!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Upstate, N.Y.
Posts: 4,639
Wow Congratulations on your 29 years Jersey. Thanks for sharing your story. Your a real inspiration to all of us. I myself am already doing those things on your list. Service work is a big help to me and has kept me sober along with all the other things in the program.
8 
8 
Congradulations on 29 years!!!! 
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Thank you, Rae. One-day-at-a-time - I thought that sounded so ridiculous at first. That's how I've reached 10 mos. though. The first days were so horrible and scary, and back then I was just trying not to die. The fog lifted at some point, and I realized I didn't want to miss out on life anymore. I'd just been going through the motions for so long. I haven't attended AA meetings on a regular basis, so SR is my meeting. When I was so nervous I thought I'd jump out of my skin, I came here and read - sometimes posted, always cried all over the keyboard.
Thanks for the wisdom, and fun too, that you've brought to SR.
Thanks for the wisdom, and fun too, that you've brought to SR.
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
WOW Rae!!!!!! That is so great!!!!!!
You got me beat in many ways, rofl. I only drank 24 years so I hit the 'equal' mark 3 years ago. It was momentous in its own way, however, I found myself looking more at what I had accomplished and my life today than at the 24 years I drank.
I know you have health problems that are greater than mine, so great that you have to be in a Nursing Home but never forget YOU ARE IMPORTANT. You do a great service here sharing your ES&H not only for me, but for many others.
There was a fellow where I got sober who I loved to hear share his story.......he always ended it with a phrase that I stole and use for myself:
"LIFE IS IN SESSION,........LET'S GET IT ON!!"
You my friend are 'getting it on.'
Thank you for sharing at SR and again CONGRATS on your 29 years!!!!!
Love and hugs,
You got me beat in many ways, rofl. I only drank 24 years so I hit the 'equal' mark 3 years ago. It was momentous in its own way, however, I found myself looking more at what I had accomplished and my life today than at the 24 years I drank.
I know you have health problems that are greater than mine, so great that you have to be in a Nursing Home but never forget YOU ARE IMPORTANT. You do a great service here sharing your ES&H not only for me, but for many others.
There was a fellow where I got sober who I loved to hear share his story.......he always ended it with a phrase that I stole and use for myself:
"LIFE IS IN SESSION,........LET'S GET IT ON!!"
You my friend are 'getting it on.'
Thank you for sharing at SR and again CONGRATS on your 29 years!!!!!
Love and hugs,
IO Storm
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern California
Posts: 18,436
Jerz..
Seems I've come to know you a bit over the last year or so..more lately.
You have become my friend.
I admire you so much...and well, 29 years of practicing the principles on a
daily basis certainly shows.
I only hope to be a smidgeon of the person you are someday.
And BTW..
Happy Happy 29 Years!!!!!
Love,
Sherry :ghug3:
Seems I've come to know you a bit over the last year or so..more lately.
You have become my friend.
I admire you so much...and well, 29 years of practicing the principles on a
daily basis certainly shows.
I only hope to be a smidgeon of the person you are someday.
And BTW..
Happy Happy 29 Years!!!!!
Love,
Sherry :ghug3:
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 4,151
Hi Rae, well I just posted in Whiners whether anyone has started a Birthday Thread...and here it is..
Congratulations on your Sobriety. You are a great friend with a good sense of fun and you say it how it is. Go Girl and give them nurses some gip!!! Love n Hugs Jo
6
Congratulations on your Sobriety. You are a great friend with a good sense of fun and you say it how it is. Go Girl and give them nurses some gip!!! Love n Hugs Jo
6
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