tanyapmc

I can't sleep due to the time change and a cold so I thought I would do an update. I have been reading SR but I have not been posting much, I'm not too sure what that is about.

This last 2 months have been a trying time in my life.

First, my Mom fell and badly broke her arm. She is 68 and I am her only child. My step-dad (the only dad I have ever really had) is 82 and has had 2 strokes, so he can't really care for her.

She fell and broke her arm 5 days before hurricane Ike hit. My house is only 2 miles from Galveston bay. I was at their house 50 miles away for the hurricane. It was the worst night of my life. I have had MANY bad detox nights over the years, but nothing compared to that night. The electricity went out about 1am and about 2 am it got very very loud outside. I got my Mom up and dressed and got my dad up. I put them each in a chair with extra pillows incase something came through the roof. My dad was really nervous and could not be quiet. I ended up giving him 1/2 a xanax. (FYi....Xanax was my drug of choice). I was not even tempted to use that night. I'm very clear that is only by God's grace. As it got louder I had the thought that if anything happened (tree through the roof, or the roof being blown off) that I could only save one of them. It was a horrible thought.

Finally it got light and I have never been so grateful for light in my entire life. The yard was a mess. You could not even drive down the roads due to trees down. It looked like a war zone. We stayed at their house all day with no electricity and boy was it HOT. That evening my husband came over to their house and we drove them to my grandfathers. We were being told it could be 2 months before electricity was restored.

My Mom still needed surgery which had been postponed due to the storm. So I drove her back to Houston for surgery and left my dad with my 90 year old grandfather. I knew I could not take care of my Mom and dad and am very grateful that my grandfather and his wife took care of my dad.

This whole time I am in control of my Mom's pain meds (my second drug of choice) and her Xanax.

After her 1st surgery we went back to her house where electricity had been restored. I live 50 miles from her and was driving back and forth alot. It was not hard to be there for the first 3 weeks because my house did not have electricity.

For 2 weeks I had no idea what had happened to my house. They would not let anyone in the town where I live (Seabrook, Tx). I saw my husband occasionally and I sure missed him. I figured out at one point that I had slept in 7 different places over 10 days!
(Someone told me that once you get sober you were supposed to STOP sleeping around LOL)

My Mom started to get better and I was able to spend one weekend at home alone with my hubby. Boy was that nice.

Then the next time I took her to the doctor he immediatly put her in the hospital and did surgery on her arm again. She had an infection and he had to go in and clean it out. So I was back taking care of my dad again. She was in the hospital for 6 days. He does not do well without her around.

After she got out of the hospital I brought them back to my house. I was missing way too many meetings and I am in college. So they have now been here for over 3 weeks. She is on IV antibiotics that I am in charge of. She has 5 more weeks of that.

Needless to say my life has been turned upside down.

My house had some damage from the storm but had NO WATER in it. THANK YOU GOD!!! About 90% of our neighborhood flooded. I can't tell you how grateful I am that we had so little damage. Our neighborhood looked like a war zone. There are still people living in tents in their yards. God bless them.

I write all of this to get it out and to let you all know that I am still clean and sober and it is totally by GOD'S GRACE. I am in awe of His power.

There are still Xanax, Lortab, Norco etc. in my house and I have NO desire to use. WOW! I never thought that could happen.

While giving my Mom her medicine one day the thought came to my mind "They are not your pills" That is NOT my thought, that is straight from God. It never mattered whose name was on a pill bottle. I would take them. In my mind they were ALWAYS mine. What a difference 22 months makes!

I am so grateful to my HP and my homegroup, my sponsor and to all of you. If I was not clean and sober I would not be able to take care of my parents. I honestly do not know what would happen to them.

I used daily for 15 years. I am now 655 days sober. I am here to tell you that if I can get clean and sober ANYONE can.

Thanks for reading this LONG post!

parentrecovers

you are really strong, tanho. and such a loving daughter. you set a good example for all of us. love ya, k

stone

This has been a hard few months for you Tan, I am proud of you.

Pelican

Thank you for the update.

Stay strong! You are an inspiration to us.

Horselover

I thank God too Tan that you are okay and that your house is, for the most part, okay too. I also thank God for getting you through that. I can't imagine the horror you went through that night and the days to follow. You are a shining example of a truly strong woman. Thanks for sharing.

least

YOur strength and compassion are inspiring. I'm glad things have calmed down somewhat for you. A big hug to you for not giving in to any temptation!

tanyapmc

Thanks to you all, very very much.

Anna

I've been thinking about you, Tanya!

I'm glad you're doing well.

CarolD

....Awesome progress

Prayers going out for y'all

Impurrfect

(((Tanya)))

Thanks for the update...you've been on my mind.

I think you are totally awesome, and a shining example of how recovery works.

Oh, and you're also an awesome daughter, and I'm glad you're their for your parents.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

Aysha

When we are called upon in a great time of need. Its amazing what we can do.
You show this. As I was reading the part where you said you had control of your moms pills..No sooner than I thought..Well you know she needs them and that is driving you as well... did I read that you said they werent yours.

Your a great soul Tanya. I only hope I can be there for my grams when those days come and have the strength and courage like you have shown.

Your doing wonderful. And you will be rewarded. My Karma belief says so. lol

Hevyn

Tanya - thanks for letting us know how you are. I always enjoyed your posts, missed them. Facing all that trauma, I would've had a hard time not taking something to calm myself down - you came through and passed the test. I hope things get brighter for you and your family.

Dee74

nice sig image Tan

I'm glad you're doing well

D

scaredykat

Wow, powerful story Tanya. It brought chills to me. Thanks for sharing your story with us. You are truly an inspiration to us. You made me think of the expression "But for the grace of God, go I."


Barb

Rella927

Tan! you are simply awesome! I have to tell you that I'am so proud of you-you are a loving daughter and you are going to make a great model for others when you are done with school and start your new venture! Keep moving forward sweetness! Love you much

coffeenut

Wow. What an awesome post...to give of yourself so unselfishly. Makes me proud to be a part of SR.

I hope everything can calm down for you. You need a break!

tanyapmc

Thanks, I hope everything settles down soon too. I could use a break!

dave47

Great post Tanya, I can just picture the scene.
Congratuations to you on surviving such a rough time and emerging so strong;
great going with all your clean time too, best wishes.

Missymae737

You ARE a power of example...

You make me so proud...

Toomutch

Tanya - You are an inspiration in so many ways. :ghug3