Last Call

I have been sober 207 days. The little voices are telling me I must be cured by now.

Wouldn’t a whiskey or 2 or 12 be good about now?

Don’t those people on TV drinking look cool?

The wife is out of town no one will know.

Heck it’s Friday afternoon, you can sleep it off all weekend if you want.

The stock market’s crashed again, the kids are a pain, work sucks, the car is breaking. Why not check out for a few hours and forget all your troubles?

It’s OK to get hammered now. You can always quit again tomorrow if it doesn’t work out, you’ve quit lots of times.

Your normal now, go ahead and have a drink.

Somewhere in the back of mind this nagging thought occurs. Maybe normal people don’t think about drinking like I do.

Maybe I'll go to a meeting.

LC

nandm

Quote:

Maybe normal people don’t think about drinking like I do.

I know they don't think about it like I did. I also know that if I were to pick up a drink today it would not take me long before the insanity would start again and I would be right back where I started from if not worse. I am glad I no longer hear the voices. Today I know that for me, to drink is to die. I am just in remission from my disease it can come back anytime I let up on my program of recovery. I choose life today.

dancinggirl

Wouldn't it be great to have to eat crap food to make the room stop spinning?

Wouldn't it be fabulous to sit on your porch naked because the house is too warm and that's a perfectly reasonable alternative?

Wouldn't feeling disgust with myself the next day be worth all those extra calories I'd have scarfed down the night before to level out?

Wouldn't everyone love to hear my slurred words?

Wouldn't it just be soooo different this time.

No.

IO Storm

Ha!

For me...

I wouldn't sip that glass of wine...I'd gulp a few.

Not enjoy a beer..I'd shotgun at least 2...and burp them up, most likely

in the process.

See..I'd be after the "feeling", not the taste.

And then off on an immediate binge, because I had already made the decision

to pick up.

After two years, 4 months and 27 days...I know I would do this.

Never cured...

And, thanks for this post LC..for reminding me today.

Hugs

espresso

That little voice, or the monkey on our back or John Barleycorn will always be there. Go to that meeting and share about how you are feeling. You know in your heart that one drink is too many and a thousand is never enough. I know that I am not a normal drinker...Heck! One or two glasses of wine or beer drunk for its taste with some left in the second glass.....Wow!! that's not what I ever did and not what I would be able to do now if I pick up that first drink.

Ananda

AWWW the memory train is rolling...I sure do miss those weekly trips to the doctor...and man...when will i get to do the hospital runs for ivs nightly???

And you know, i can't remember the last time i got to scream at my son "I hate you" out in the front yard...or anywhere else for that matter (ooops guess i do remember actually)

Gosh I really miss the broken tolet, moldy dishes ....and the late fees..what is life without late fees?????

Jomey

OMG, Dancing Girl, that is one of the most powerful posts that I have read on SR in a long time. It is so the way I need to hear things. Thanks for sharing that.

Hope you are finding some relief from the alcoholic voice, LC.

Take care,
Jomey

Serenidad

WOW, do those thoughts sound familiar! This disease is cunning and baffling and wants us dead! I have a little over 6 months of sobriety and every time those thoughts come into my head I go to a meeting and see or hear a story of someome who relapsed and what He11 it was and I decide not to drink that day.

Remember the basics...ONE DAY AT A TIME, EASY DOES IT, FIRST THINGS FIRST...etc...all the slogans.

Good luck!

Jersey Nonny

And, my absolute favorite (a big reason why, after almost 29 years sober, I continue to come here to Sober Recovery):

He who forgets to remember is doomed to repeat.

BTW...only hams are "cured", and once a pickle, never again a cucumber.

Think of us while you enjoy that meeting!

least

It is cunning, baffling, powerful, and PATIENT. It can wait a day or week or month or year or many years. It will still be cunning, baffling, and powerful. We will be the weak ones. I don't know if I have any more recovery in me and don't want to find out.

I am no longer 'into' risk and danger and destruction. Living sober is risky enough without stacking the deck against myself.

Thanks for a powerful reminder of what waits for us forever. I'll always be a pickle, but can avoid soaking in any more 'vinegar'. Nobody wants a pickle that's still 'pickling'!

nogard

Thinking I was cured, no longer an addict cost me a relaspe of eleven years after 20 years clean and in that eleven years I destroyed everything and everyone most of all me.

Recovery rocks I hold on to it every day.

CarolD

Had I resumed drinking last night....I would have missed

My morning prayer and healthy breakfast
Coming on here to share with on line friends
My noon AA meeting...Topic ..Gratitude

Picking up the mail for my neighbors
My new sponsee's unexpected visit
Cooking and enjoying a favorite casserole

Starting and finishing a project in my apartment
Calling R. who is dying..terminal cancer.
Being home when my Army Grandson called for advice
and knowing I gave him the best G-Ma he deserves.

....drinking has no place in my fantastic life.

Choose wisely ...the life you save ...is your own.
8

Stubborn1

The people look good on tv but I'm sure my dead best friend doesn't look too cool in her grave right about now. That's enough to keep me sober.

Boleo

Chairman Mao had a cure for alcoholism that was 100% effective.

They are more commonly known as bullets.

Thanks2HP

If I could drink like a normal person I'd drink every day.

SelfSeeking

LOL

And yes... my dead friend found a "cure" for his alcoholism. Suicided 2 years ago yesterday, 28 years old. I'll keep taking the treatment of AA, thanks...

IO Storm

If I relapsed...might not make it back...

Doctors told me the next drink could kill me..that was in 1997.

Drank for a year 2005-2006

Played Russian Roulette...my eyes were turning yellow.

Don't want to go out that way...

I am going to a potluck/speaker meeting tonight.

A friend just got 15 years..and I need to hear her story...as she

needs to tell it.

Love and prayers, LC!

four812

wow: different than life with late fees that are due to addiction/alcholism



yes...and for me...If i could drink like an alcholic and have no pain then I'd drink....thank goodness for pain otherwise i'd kill myself like an animal that eats until it dies.

geekorunique

My thinking will get me long before my drinking does...I start to think that maybe it would be ok...I'm nearly five months sober and surely EVERYONE relapses at least once...but no I know that everyone doesn't. I look around my group and there is at least five people who came into AA and stayed in. I want to be one of them. I don't want to be one of the people who think that AA has revolving doors.

So when my head starts to get to me...I'm going to tell it where to go!