barblsn

I spoke to my AH last night (no use in 2 1/2 years due to being in prison). I told him his daughter wasn't sure she wanted him back in her life right away. I expected him to be angry, hurt, etc. But he said while he felt bad because he loves her and wants to make amends, he understands. He said he is going to focus on his relationship with God, his recovery, and our marriage. He was calm, took responsibility for his past actions, and didn't accuse anybody of anything.

This is SO different. He'll be home in one month. Pray that he sticks with this, pray that I stay out of his way.

thanks

Hangin' In

Barb,

Sounds very good to me. I'm grateful for this change of attitude in him.

I think the best thing you can do is continue to work on you while he concentrates on his life. I know when my AD was in rehab I was told to fill my life with as much recovery as possible because I also needed to be as ready as possible when she came home. So if you don't go to meetings, I'd recommend adding them to your life. You can have double the support and recovery through face to face meetings and this board.

Hugs,
Hangin' In

Stubborn1

Sounds like wonderful progress. Your daughter will come around in time and it's nice that he's giving her that time. Anger is just hidden fear so by him not getting mad it shows that he has accepted his actions.
Can he come teach my ah coping skills? lol

winnie12

Good for your daughter for speaking up for herself. So many kids dont understand that they also have the right to be treated well by their parents. Giving her time and letting her know she has some control over that I think is very healty.

Good for your AH for respecting others feelings.

Good for you - stick with what you know and let things come slowly.

Troubledone

Wonderful news. I sure know what you mean about wanting prayers to stay out of the way.. I struggle with that one myself.

Sending prayers up for you and yours...

barblsn

I will always remember when a friend's husband was new in recovery and she was doing everything for him. Her counselor said to her "does your husband have a brain? Let him use it!"