hi all
lidy3
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: kelso scotland
Posts: 30
hi all
hi my name is linda im from scotland omg where do i begin i have been of codeine meds for nearly a year but got myself on that horrible long road again im taking speed at the moment and need to get off i promised myself after ten long years on codeine,vallium,herion i would never get another habit again but me being a horrible selfish person i have .i have so much confusion and guilt because of my kids there the best but why didnt i stop myself? i want to get help i have no one i just need someone who does not judge cause i do it to me everyday just a friend
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 70
You're in the right place, you are not alone. There are millions of us sick addicts/alkies out here.
My experience is that the moment I realized and admitted to myself that I could not control my substance abuse, that was when I was able to initiate recovery.
I am a godless freak who found piece of mind in the 12 steps, it can work for you too. We can help, all you have to do is reach out, open your mind, and take a little action for your recovery.
My experience is that the moment I realized and admitted to myself that I could not control my substance abuse, that was when I was able to initiate recovery.
I am a godless freak who found piece of mind in the 12 steps, it can work for you too. We can help, all you have to do is reach out, open your mind, and take a little action for your recovery.
member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,433
Welcome to SR Lindy!
It would be interesting to challenge those thoughts... Without knowing you at all, I'll go out on a limb and bet you're not a horrible person. Maybe you just have some problems that you need to work on?
Confusion and guilt are tough feelings to deal with. My take on it is that confusion can be tackled by setting priorities... such as recovery and your children's wellbeing. Once you have a "guiding principle" of sorts, the rest of the clutter doesn't really matter all that much because you can take care of it later.
Guilt takes time. Try to avoid being too hard on yourself. Are you considering a recovery program? I highly recommend you do. Once you've made the decision to clean up, maybe some of the guilt will start clearing up because: you ARE doing something about it.
You've come to the right place then, by signing up you have automatically inherited dozens of friends who care about you 
So start posting, welcome aboard. 
Originally Posted by lindyg30 
i would never get another habit again but me being a horrible selfish person i have
It would be interesting to challenge those thoughts... Without knowing you at all, I'll go out on a limb and bet you're not a horrible person. Maybe you just have some problems that you need to work on?
Originally Posted by lindyg30
i have so much confusion and guilt because of my kids there the best but why didnt i stop myself?
Guilt takes time. Try to avoid being too hard on yourself. Are you considering a recovery program? I highly recommend you do. Once you've made the decision to clean up, maybe some of the guilt will start clearing up because: you ARE doing something about it.
Originally Posted by lindyg30
i want to get help i have no one i just need someone who does not judge cause i do it to me everyday just a friend
So start posting, welcome aboard. Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Olympia, WA
Posts: 83
Hi Lindy,
I'm new to recovery too. SR has been extremely helpful to me. I have been reading the posts like crazy and getting great insight and confidence from all who share here that I too can overcome my addiction. :ghug3 I am very glad you are here.
I'm new to recovery too. SR has been extremely helpful to me. I have been reading the posts like crazy and getting great insight and confidence from all who share here that I too can overcome my addiction. :ghug3 I am very glad you are here.
lidy3
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: kelso scotland
Posts: 30
well day one no more i hope its not worth it i feel parnoid hearing things.thought my wee one was crying and i in a state stupid things i can do it if not for me defo for the kids .my long road with codeine and herion and all the rest was bad enough i have always been put down ur stupid linda u cant do this cause ur a total f*** up my own fault for beliving they were all right i have lost so many loved ones and my way was to get high but u always come down at one point and the hurt and anger is still there ive seen docs but they say here anti dpressents see u in a couple of weeks yea ur a great help idoit or "i think u need mental treatment "haha or counselling for my past i get a counsellor and she more crackers than i am i end up feeling sorry for them yea i been through hell and back mother was heavy drinker i got sexualluy and phyisical abuse went to 22 junior schools 3 high school 2 school for lets just say bad kids trouble with police preagnant by 16 my close family have died just recently got attacked cause of stupid rumours but thats just a part of my life i have to cope with.soz i am in a moaning moodxx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
Lindy,
I have struggled a great deal over the years. I too have a history of sexual abuse. I also have depression and am on medication.
It isn't easy, and my heart goes out to you. I have had to stay sober and work with a conuncelor and take medication.
But I want you to know that all the counciling, being on medication, and staying sober are all worth it.
I like me today
14 mos sober
I have struggled a great deal over the years. I too have a history of sexual abuse. I also have depression and am on medication.
It isn't easy, and my heart goes out to you. I have had to stay sober and work with a conuncelor and take medication.
But I want you to know that all the counciling, being on medication, and staying sober are all worth it.
I like me today
14 mos sober
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