No Contact Rule: hope this helps
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Southeast
Posts: 114
No Contact Rule: hope this helps
I noticed a lot of sadness for those here who are trying to break it off with a significant other....I am in the same place. I am posting this article on NO CONTACT with the hopes it helps you heal.
The No Contact Rule
May 14, 2007 by Rose City Girl
If you are not acquainted with the No Contact Rule, now is the time. The ‘No Contact Rule’ is established for the following reason; an inability to cut off a relationship that is over.
While the rule may sound simple, let me tell you, it’s not, which is all the more reason to enforce it when possible. Breaking up with someone can cause a rollercoaster of emotions including anger, frustration and large amounts of pain which is all the more reason to get away as soon as possible from the source that is causing it. Relationships can be dragged out for months and in some cases years when one or both parties stays in continual contact even though its obvious that the relationship is long over.
How to abide by the No Contact Rule
1. No calling. Period. I don’t care if your cat ran away; your house burned down or if your car dumped you on the side of the road. Drama is not a reason to stir up a phone call to the ex. Drunk dialing is big no-no as well. If you feel like calling, call a friend until the feeling passes.
2. No sex. I know giving up a relationship means giving up sex, but it’s a dangerous recipe to continue intimate relations with an ex. Not only can you become dependent on this closeness but it keeps you in the dark ages on the “get over him” timeline. That’s what vibrators are for.
3. No spying. You would be amazed at how many women I have known that take it upon themselves to do a quick drive by of the ex’s house. This can satisfy that craving to know if he is home or out on the town with the boys. Worse case scenario you see a strange car outside and your imagination hits an all time high. Don’t do it. This can cause an emotional phone call (see #1) to your ex. Besides, blabbing to him what you saw will only make you look psycho. Not good.
4. No information sharing through friends. If you the two of you have mutual friends, don’t volunteer information to them in hopes they are going to tell your ex. It is tempting to want your ex to know that you won the million dollar lottery or just met the man of your dreams but it benefits neither one of you in the end. If your friends are blabbing, ask them nicely to keep your personal information to themselves.
5. Get rid of temptation by deleting your ex’s phone number from your mobile/cell phone (this will prevent drunk dialing) and block his email address. This adds more security layers to the No Contact Rule in an age of technology.
The No Contact Rule exists to hasten the healing process. By dragging out the end of a relationship, it only delays you from happiness in the future. It is important to allow yourself time to mourn the end of the relationship but keep the no contact rule in place. It will be hard at first but the longer you go, the easier it gets. Remember, practice makes perfect. If you find that you slipped up on any of the above, don’t beat yourself up. It’s never too late to start fresh. Remember, no contact means NO CONTACT. It’s the first and most important step to moving on. Now, go get started!
The No Contact Rule
May 14, 2007 by Rose City Girl
If you are not acquainted with the No Contact Rule, now is the time. The ‘No Contact Rule’ is established for the following reason; an inability to cut off a relationship that is over.
While the rule may sound simple, let me tell you, it’s not, which is all the more reason to enforce it when possible. Breaking up with someone can cause a rollercoaster of emotions including anger, frustration and large amounts of pain which is all the more reason to get away as soon as possible from the source that is causing it. Relationships can be dragged out for months and in some cases years when one or both parties stays in continual contact even though its obvious that the relationship is long over.
How to abide by the No Contact Rule
1. No calling. Period. I don’t care if your cat ran away; your house burned down or if your car dumped you on the side of the road. Drama is not a reason to stir up a phone call to the ex. Drunk dialing is big no-no as well. If you feel like calling, call a friend until the feeling passes.
2. No sex. I know giving up a relationship means giving up sex, but it’s a dangerous recipe to continue intimate relations with an ex. Not only can you become dependent on this closeness but it keeps you in the dark ages on the “get over him” timeline. That’s what vibrators are for.
3. No spying. You would be amazed at how many women I have known that take it upon themselves to do a quick drive by of the ex’s house. This can satisfy that craving to know if he is home or out on the town with the boys. Worse case scenario you see a strange car outside and your imagination hits an all time high. Don’t do it. This can cause an emotional phone call (see #1) to your ex. Besides, blabbing to him what you saw will only make you look psycho. Not good.
4. No information sharing through friends. If you the two of you have mutual friends, don’t volunteer information to them in hopes they are going to tell your ex. It is tempting to want your ex to know that you won the million dollar lottery or just met the man of your dreams but it benefits neither one of you in the end. If your friends are blabbing, ask them nicely to keep your personal information to themselves.
5. Get rid of temptation by deleting your ex’s phone number from your mobile/cell phone (this will prevent drunk dialing) and block his email address. This adds more security layers to the No Contact Rule in an age of technology.
The No Contact Rule exists to hasten the healing process. By dragging out the end of a relationship, it only delays you from happiness in the future. It is important to allow yourself time to mourn the end of the relationship but keep the no contact rule in place. It will be hard at first but the longer you go, the easier it gets. Remember, practice makes perfect. If you find that you slipped up on any of the above, don’t beat yourself up. It’s never too late to start fresh. Remember, no contact means NO CONTACT. It’s the first and most important step to moving on. Now, go get started!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Southeast
Posts: 114
Originally Posted by wenchris 
Okay, so how do we write a no contact rule, or necessary only contact rule for our sons and daughters? Help!
Ack! Good question. I am at the bottom of a bag of smartfood cheddar popcorn...I have NO RIGHT to give advice to your question after eating the entire bag in order to cope with NO CONTACT today!
Buehller? Anyone? Buehller?
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