ran into an old dealer today
ran into an old dealer today
so today before i work, i stopped by CVS for a soda and some cigarettes. on my way out, i ran into one of the last people i want to see right now: one of my old dealers. he kept tryin to talk to me, askin me if i had been getting my smack from someone else since i havent called him in almost 2 months. i was just tryin to get out of there, because being in that situation really made me uncomfortable. he told me that he wanted to hang out and smoke a blunt & shoot some H. i told him that i was really busy these days with work and life and didnt think i would be able to chill anytime soon. i wish i had handled it different tho. instead of simply saying "no thanks, im living sober now and i intend to keep living that way" i acted like maybe now wasn't the right time to get f*cked up but who knows about tomorrow? god, i wish i had just said straight up what i was thinking. the whole day at work i was thinkin about it, and it actually crossed my mind to give him a call! i dont know why even after years of ******** im still even entertaining those kind of thoughts.
anyway, i just needed some advice from you guys. my sponsors working and im feelin a little scared havin no one to talk to about this right now.
anyway, i just needed some advice from you guys. my sponsors working and im feelin a little scared havin no one to talk to about this right now.
Last edited by mike13; 10-08-2008 at 02:52 PM.
I would use the sober voice that was less loud then the addict voice. You know you don't want that stuff. I would definitely tell him what you wrote here the next time you see him or if he calls. Don't give in to it. You don't want to go there.
At least nothing happened and you're still sober. That's great!! Don't leave any gaps for it though. Know what I mean?
At least nothing happened and you're still sober. That's great!! Don't leave any gaps for it though. Know what I mean?
Hey Mike - My husband had the same problem when he stopped doing his drug of choice. He ran into the guy many times and he called my husband a couple of times after that. It took some time, but the guy got the hint, he knew he had stopped, considering he wasn't calling for it 3 times a week. If you don't run into him again, no worries, but if becomes a problem and it weighs on your mind, definitely speak up. I think it's great that you are staying sober and you should tell him it's just not something you want to deal with anymore, that is if you run into him again. Making excuses will only keep him coming around.
I think you did just fine. You don't owe him any kind of explanation. I think it's great how separate you consider yourself from him and the life he has. How wonderful that you have now chosen a better path- WELL DONE!
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