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Am I in trouble??

Old 10-07-2008, 01:36 PM
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Am I in trouble??

Hello everyone, new user here.

Just filled out two questionaires on different websites to find out if I am likely to have a drink problem after googling alcohol/depression of which I suffer the latter after the former on a regular basis. Results are 17 and 14 yes's out of 20, which I gather is not good.

The thing is I don't drink everyday, more likely every other and probably get drunk to the point of memory loss once or twice a week. I understand that I need to cut down but am unsure whether I have a problem or am just over reacting and need to have a bit more willpower.

I appreciate many people are in far worse situations than myself and don't want to clog up the boards simply because I can't get my sh*t together.

Please advice, thanks in advance

EB
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Old 10-07-2008, 01:47 PM
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Used to think I had depression, anxiety, panic attacks etc

Funnily not been bothered with any of that since I stopped drinking.

Know its not as straight forward as that for everyone but there you go.

I can't get my sh*t together either, its why I'm here, ain't nobody asked me to leave yet !

Get drunk to the pont of memory loss twice a week !!!! mmmmm !! Problem ? mmmmmm!

Stick around, read, post some more.

Welcome to SR, hope you find your answers.
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Old 10-07-2008, 02:01 PM
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Welcome to SR.

You don't have to drink every day to be an alcoholic. It's about control. We alcoholics have lost control of our drinking. Try going for a month without a drink or better yet a year. If you don't want to wait that long try controlling the amount you drink. For the next month just try having 2 bears every other night. Or just try having a couple drinks the next time you drink. It's the inability to stop once we have had the first drink that separates us from "normal" drinkers.

It's nobody's place to tell you if you are an alcoholic or not. Try what I have suggested then be honest with yourself and you decide.
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Old 10-07-2008, 02:03 PM
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Hi essexboy.
Welcome!
You aren't clogging anything up.
Yup, only you can decide if you are an alcoholic.
By the way, many people are in different situations than you, doesn't make them less or more likely to be an alcoholic than you. just different.

Just a little passage from the Big Book

"Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. By every form of self- deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right-about- face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people!

Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums we could increase the list ad infinitum.

We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself, step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. It will not take long for you to decide, if you are honest with yourself about it. It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition.

Though there is no way of proving it, we believe that early in our drinking careers most of us could have stopped drinking. But the difficulty is that few alcoholics have enough desire to stop while there is yet time."


Again, welcome! Stick around even if you don't think you are an alcoholic. We are a pretty fun group of folks
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Old 10-07-2008, 02:17 PM
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Originally Posted by essexboy View Post
Just filled out two questionaires on different websites to find out if I am likely to have a drink problem after googling alcohol/depression of which I suffer the latter after the former on a regular basis. Results are 17 and 14 yes's out of 20, which I gather is not good.

The thing is I don't drink everyday, more likely every other and probably get drunk to the point of memory loss once or twice a week. I understand that I need to cut down but am unsure whether I have a problem or am just over reacting and need to have a bit more willpower.
Welcome to SR EB, hope you continue to read and post here. I love the reading that TTOSBT shared, and yes we are a fun group of folks.

Just a few simple thoughts to consider.......

Normal drinkers probably don't drink to the point of memory loss, they don't contemplate whether they need to cut down or not, they don't give much thought to overreacting and needing more willpower, and they probably don't take questionaires about alcoholism just for the heck of it. Those things never even cross their minds.

I used to think about those things all the time. One day, lo and behold, I admitted that I was an alcoholic and needed a program of recovery. There was no thought about cutting down or moderating, I knew that I could never safely drink again.
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Old 10-07-2008, 02:37 PM
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Chances are if you have to question whether or not drinking might be a problem for you---it most likely is. But, like Dean mentioned--only you can say whether or not you are an alcoholic. I would suggest hang around here for while/read some posts/keep asking questions and reaching out to others in the meantime. Welcome! Glad you are here!
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Old 10-07-2008, 03:07 PM
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I'm glad you found us. I'm an alkie who also suffers from depression. I take meds for the depression, and work hard at recovery. Day by day, little by little, life is getting better.
You're in the right place - please stick around and continue to post.
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Old 10-07-2008, 03:09 PM
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Originally Posted by essexboy View Post

Please advice, thanks in advance

EB

Well, the consensus seems to be that you can't diagnosis anyone else. That we all decide for ourselves. And I agree that its much more valuable to have the realization yourself. That way you start to truly internalize the fact and think about getting help. And maybe actually get help.

(& you are here, actually, haven taken those tests and posted a request for advice - maybe you're already at that stage and don't know it)

But since you asked for advice, I'd say, in my opinion, you almost certainly are an alcoholic.

Now before anyone jumps down my throat, just notice that I did say that it was just my opinion. Since you asked.

And if you're not, that you won't feel any deep sorrow at the idea of doing away with alcohol in your life. You know?

Also, BTW - don't worry about clogging up the phone lines. You matter just as much as the rest of us here.

And it's not a matter of getting your act together. Stop punishing yourself. If it were just a matter of pulling myself together, I would've been sober years and years ago.

It's a matter of deeply accepting (some call it surrendering to) your alcoholism and recognizing that you cannot control it and getting outside help to do so. And there are lots of ways to do that but that's another chapter.

Sorry so long.
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Old 10-07-2008, 03:36 PM
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I actually have no problem at all identifying alchoholics!!!!! If I know them well I call a spade a spade!

You know you are in exactly the right place...I don't know you and don't know if you are an alchoholic...but I believe that one of the things that SR does so well is to allow people to come and sort through themselves and see if they are or they are not and if they are...how to begin to start a path to sobriety and to be supported in their sobriety.

I'm glad you are here!
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Old 10-07-2008, 04:22 PM
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Welcome to SR

I think you need more information about alcoholism
in order to decide if you are an alcoholic or not.

Please check out this link....Blackouts are explained on #17.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html

Glad you are here with us...
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Old 10-07-2008, 04:44 PM
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Hello!

It took some time for me to realize I am an alcoholic. Memory loss from drinking is no laughing matter. I think you need to do more research on the entire issue. If you can experiement with your control, like was mentioned above, then maybe u dont have a problem, u r just getting a bit carried away with it. I cant control it. I have tried and it does not work for me. If I have one I will have 20. If I have none I am good. I too blacked out from drinking....pretty scary to have that happen. But then its stupid that I would go back and repeat it over and over and over. Waking up feeling guilty and ashamed for the night before. Not remember what the hell I did or said. Little flashbacks would pop up here and there but nothing enough to make sense out of the night. Good luck with figuring this out. Lots of great advice to get u started!
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Old 10-07-2008, 06:10 PM
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Thanks to everyone for the advice

I have been reading this thread and others trying to get a bearing on my situation and I think I've just fallen into a bad habit. I admit I drink too much, probably in the region of 40 pints of lager and 4 or 5 bottles of wine a week on average so am going to try stopping tommorow.
I have 1st drink syndrome 95% of the time and always have, but I realise that's never realistically gonna change. Its the day after depression and anxiety thats the worst for me, unable to talk to anyone and scared of everything. It used to be the memory loss but now I tend to drink mainly at home so whatever I do is contained in a way. I`m not a angry drinker so my wife doesn't get to stressed although she does moan about the quantities.
The hardest thing is, I like drinking, I like the way it makes me feel to a point, maybe 6 or 7 beers but then I can't stop until I'm too tired or drunk to carry on.
Part of me thinks I have a problem but part of me doesn't cos 10 years ago I was a lot worse, so it seems to have got better but hasn't gone away. It has become more civilised to a degree which makes it harder to realise there's a problem. I used to drink neat vodka at 6am on the way to work to straighten myself up, pub at lunchtime and spent most evenings drunk while on cocaine or/and exctasy. I would do it for about 4 or 5 days solid then I would stop for a day or two until the aches and pains had gone then start again.
Now my body takes longer to get over it, I'm getting older (34) and I dont know if I will last another 30 years if i carry on. I think subconsiously I`m managing it, but badly, just keeping myself out of big trouble but teetering on the edge all the time.

Bring on tommorow

Sorry for the waffle

EB
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Old 10-07-2008, 08:02 PM
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I understand where you are coming from as I am Essex as well.

Sadly I cannot control my alcohol consumption anymore. I am getting drunk more times than I should be. I do not drink booze on my cornflakes and am quite capable of withstanding a few wines at a Christening. But once I am on the booze, nothing stops me. I am totallly incapable of drinking normally. I am sitting here having drunk about 2 and a half bottles of wine.

I am ******.
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Old 10-07-2008, 08:10 PM
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Welcome Essexboy and Jeanette!

Essex, keep on reading on here. You may be a heavy drinker and not an alcoholic, but really think about it long and hard. I know for me my drinking was a problem when it started to affect others in my family. (I was never an angry drunk either, just silly)

Jeanette,

Welcome to the board. Keep posting! Maybe start a new thread and tell us a little about yourself! keep coming back!

blessings! Sheila
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Old 10-07-2008, 08:16 PM
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essexboy,
Alrighty then, carry on. You are the only one that can decide if your life is unmanageable.

Jeanette, welcome!
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Old 10-07-2008, 08:26 PM
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Jeanette.....Hello and Welcome!
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Old 10-07-2008, 08:28 PM
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Okeey - Dokeey. If that works for you.

In some ways, the point isn't about whether or not you are an alcoholic. The point is whether or not alcohol plays a destructive and unhealthy role in your life.

I don't know. I just don't know. But you do.
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