"Beautiful Boy" - have you read it?
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"Beautiful Boy" - have you read it?
Not sure if this book came up here before since I'm not here on a daily basis. At any rate, i finished it yesterday.
Could have written it, in many ways, for the similarities. There were also some differences that made me just plain jealous. The author's son achieved long periods of clean time (over a year, a few times) and I found myself just wishing my AD could...
At any rate, the book really put me thru the emotional ringer. lots of crying in identification. then I felt sort of defeated in terms of thinking, well I really haven't let go of anything if I can feel so much sadness again. But I realize, there is no way, no matter how surrendered, no matter how much I turn it over, that I can avoid feelings!
In another way (which I know only the addicts here will understand) the book made me want to use. crazy. of course. but it did.
then there was also the way the author described the heightened feelings, the awarenesses, the spiritual journey, the way you find more compassion, more sense of being human by going thru all of this with a child... and that made me almost grateful but I can't quite go there! In the end, I was just sad and wiped out emotionally. so I went to sleep, and woke up feeling 'normal' again. thank God for feeling normal. when this journey started over 2 years ago, there was never feeling 'normal'.
As far as my kid goes, nothing much new there. Still using. She says she made a new appt with the HIV clinic and "I know I'll stay for the whole appointment this time, mom, because I can't stop throwing up." We'll see. I will not take her nor babysit her any more.
Could have written it, in many ways, for the similarities. There were also some differences that made me just plain jealous. The author's son achieved long periods of clean time (over a year, a few times) and I found myself just wishing my AD could...
At any rate, the book really put me thru the emotional ringer. lots of crying in identification. then I felt sort of defeated in terms of thinking, well I really haven't let go of anything if I can feel so much sadness again. But I realize, there is no way, no matter how surrendered, no matter how much I turn it over, that I can avoid feelings!
In another way (which I know only the addicts here will understand) the book made me want to use. crazy. of course. but it did.
then there was also the way the author described the heightened feelings, the awarenesses, the spiritual journey, the way you find more compassion, more sense of being human by going thru all of this with a child... and that made me almost grateful but I can't quite go there! In the end, I was just sad and wiped out emotionally. so I went to sleep, and woke up feeling 'normal' again. thank God for feeling normal. when this journey started over 2 years ago, there was never feeling 'normal'.
As far as my kid goes, nothing much new there. Still using. She says she made a new appt with the HIV clinic and "I know I'll stay for the whole appointment this time, mom, because I can't stop throwing up." We'll see. I will not take her nor babysit her any more.
(((Sleepy)))
I haven't read the book yet, but want to. I think his son also wrote a book from the A's side of view.
Sorry your daughter is still struggling, but you just keep sounding better and better.
The things all you moms go through, and how you do it, is very inspiring to me.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
I haven't read the book yet, but want to. I think his son also wrote a book from the A's side of view.
Sorry your daughter is still struggling, but you just keep sounding better and better.
The things all you moms go through, and how you do it, is very inspiring to me.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
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The part where he has the subarachnoid hemmorage and can't remember his own name, but totally obsesses about his son and his son's well being - just brought it home again, how connected we are to them. But, like I said, now that a day has passed since finishing it, I'm glad I read it too, and am OK in spite of all the emotions it kicked up.
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Yes, I read that book and the one that his son wrote "Tweak". So did my 19 yr old daughter. My other daughter (22yr) is the addict in our life. Both of us could totally relate to the things that had gone on. "Tweak" gave us an interesting view from the addicts side. I saw both of these men on a talk show not too long ago.
Sorry to hear your daughter has still not gotten sober.
She may...keep the faith while you practice detachment with love.
Yes, I read the book. The author captured how hard it is to parent an addict.
She may...keep the faith while you practice detachment with love.
Yes, I read the book. The author captured how hard it is to parent an addict.
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