lovesmenot74

Okay I don't know if I'm just needing to vent, or if I'm looking for others who have experienced this or what ... but I've been crying my eyes out for weeks now ... almost daily ... today, however, I'm MAD MAD MAD ... any reference to drugs in a movie, or comments by ppl, or anything is p!ss!ing me RIGHT OFF!!! Any movies, television shows, commercials where a woman is acting trampy or sexually available etc ... same reaction ... ANGER I can barely contain!!!

I HATE DRUGS and what they've done to my relationship ... I HATE the little tramp he's with now ... because she accepts and encourages his addiction (I'm assuming that is why he's with her) ... i HATE IT ALL!!!!!!

I HATE his family for blaming me when they've ALL had problems with him in the past and KNOW he lies, steals, won't take responsibility for himself. I HATE his family for still enabling him ... that people aren't breaching him when he is using drugs and that violates his probation! I hate that they are all covering for him and telling him that I was the problem and drove him to it. I HATE that I want so badly for him to get his sh!t together and come back to me!!!! I HATE that I still love him!!! I HATE that he hasn't had the decency to call me ... I HATE that the last time I talked to him, he saw how much he was hurting me by replacing me when I thought we were trying to work things out ... and that he hasn't shown one OUNCE of concern for me or how I'M doing here with my freakin' heart shattered into a million little pieces!!!

I HATE that I'm still blaming myself and picking apart every single interaction I've had with him to find fault in the way I handled things ... thinking if I'd just had more patience then we wouldn't have had that last fight ... if I'd tried to communicate better with him instead of letting all my resentment build up and being nasty to him ... if maybe instead of picking a fight with him, I'd have held him and told him I loved him ... that maybe THAT would have made a difference. I HATE that kicking him out in an attempt to make him responsible for his actions has actually pushed him further into addiction and hanging with the crowd that wants him to think it's okay to be this way. I'm SSOOOOOOO ANGRY!!!!!

Impurrfect

Sweetie, anger is just one of the stages we have to go through to move forward. Yes, I've been there and it does end.

I know that when my relationship ended I went through numb, relieved, angry, and sad..sometimes all in the same day.

Venting here is a good way to help release the anger. Journaling has helped a lot of people, too.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

krhea75

You go girl, get that hate out, and then turn around and get back in the struggle. Venting is good.
krhea

BayAreaPhoenix

I agree. Vent it, feel it, let it all out - every last bit of it, because then you can let it go! You are dealing with your feelings. Don't get stuck! Go thru it! get thru it! Then move on, you'll be cleansed!

(((hugs)))