westie100

Ive had a problem with alcohol and drugs ever since i was about 14 and ever since then everything has become so messed up and i dont know what to do anymore it has gotten me in so much trobule in the past and still continues to do so but yet i still cant get alcohol off my mind knowing wot it has done to me. I got kicked out of school when i was 14 and since then have done nothing with my life but got in trouble with the law and abused myself with drugs and drink. Ive gone thru juvenille detetion jail and rehab and everytime i get out 1st thing i do is get off my head and im over it. I turned 20 the other day and am starten to realise there is more 2 life and Im over liven like this. Ive got drug induced psycosis depression and post traumatic stress disorder all becos of the life Ive led and I think Im starten to mature but im always thinken bout the bottle. Ive been going alright lately getten into boxing and exercise but Im at the end of a 4 day bender and i done some really bad things and i dont kno wot to do i wanna change but it just doesnt seem 2 want to happen. Ive lost all my family and most of my friends i dont even have any1 left who i would consider a true friend i feel like life is useless and sometimes I think bout enden it myself. I would love someone to talk to to try to get thru these hard times. Thank you.

mikel60

Hi Westie,
I'm Mike from Boston, MA. You've made good move checking out this website. At age twenty I had no clue - didn't think I had a problem at all. If you can put all the drugs and alcohol aside -and you can - you will be amazed at how your life will change. You can do this - just check out all those here who have done so. Keep posting and keep strong! You are worth it!

Mike

westie100

Thanks for the kind words Mike yeah Ive gotta do it. No matter how much i love grog we just dont mix i get very violent when i drink and do things i wouldnt normally do.. Im gonna have to be strong because i could all of a sudden feel like a drink out of no were and ive gotta be strong enuff to tell my self no.. same goes for drugs I had a big problem with ice (meth) not to long ago but Ive gotten that out of my system now its really just pot which i dont think is to bad but other ppl dont agree with me.. Ive lost my family which is hard knowing your parents are sick of you and i will never see them for a long time they kicked me out when I was 16 and I dont blame them.. Sorry if Im going on to much talken to much **** but I gota get it out of me. Im only young still and i gess its good i reelised at such a young age better then being an adult but its gona be hard to get thru because Ive relied on drugs or grog for such a long time. Its all I can really remember growing up. I really need 2 get a job, save up, get a house start a family you know the deal but Ive gotta sort myself out before I start doing that kind of stuff. Anyway sorry for talken so much but I had to get it out. Its good how I can let my feelings out here and not be judged like i always am in real life. I hate it the looks I get when Im walken down the street people get scared or look down on me like Im a junkie or a crim just like Im finished my life is finished and Im heading no were but they dont no me they just judge by the way I look and get around but Ive grown up round the streets my whole life of corse im gonna get a certain look oh well thanks for listening I hope to make some good friends here and get to no people thank you

spudida

Welcome Westie! You're in the right place for talking and being talked to. There is a lot of support here, so keep posting. Look at the two weeks and under thread and all the new posts that are cries for help, and see how many are struggling not to take that first drink because their lives are totally out of control simply because of a substance they once enjoyed. You are not alone...grab ahold of our hands and come on board...You can do it Westie...one minute at a time. :bounce

parentrecovers

welcome to sr, westie! hugs, k

Horselover

Welcome to SR Westie. Congratulations on making a decision to end the insanity. Can you find a face to face organization to help or therapist? What about AA? I would think you would benefit from having people to call if you feel weak or just need to talk. Of course, you can post anytime on SR, but if you need immediate help, having a person to call is a good idea. Good luck Westie and welcome once again!!

coffeenut

Welcome. Keep reading. Keep posting.

bostonluv

You're in the right place. Lots of support here. We understand. Welcome.