..am at a loss
..am at a loss
I am not sure what to do or what to say or where to go. I have been dealing with this for a few years now. I have a problem, the one I love, the love of my life has a drinking problem. I have tried to talk to her, to plead with her, to beg her to want to change. I have prayed, cried, gotten mad and sad over this for awhile.
She is my girlfriend, it is weird to say that "girlfriend" I am 38. Anyway, she is 46 and we have been together in this relationship for about 3 years. But we grew into this over 4 years prior to that. She has always drank, in party mode, that I have known her, but the past few years she has changed and drinks heavily. She has done detox in a facility twice and is on her way there again.
After a lot of thought I have made a choice and told her that something needs to change and either she makes a choice to do something positive or we find her some place else to live. She was half drunk when I told her this and so we will see if and what she remembers tomorrow but I do plan on sticking to this.
I can't do it anymore.
So, I am here to see how I may be able to help her. Whatever I have done up to now has done nothing for her. I have offered everything I am and that I can to her to help. I know SHE has to want this.
Anyway, I have read a few posts and think this might be a good place for me to vent and get help.
Thanks for this resource, thanks for letting me get this off my chest and I thank you in advance for any knowledge you may impart and share with me.
Namaste
~Myrddin
She is my girlfriend, it is weird to say that "girlfriend" I am 38. Anyway, she is 46 and we have been together in this relationship for about 3 years. But we grew into this over 4 years prior to that. She has always drank, in party mode, that I have known her, but the past few years she has changed and drinks heavily. She has done detox in a facility twice and is on her way there again.
After a lot of thought I have made a choice and told her that something needs to change and either she makes a choice to do something positive or we find her some place else to live. She was half drunk when I told her this and so we will see if and what she remembers tomorrow but I do plan on sticking to this.
I can't do it anymore.
So, I am here to see how I may be able to help her. Whatever I have done up to now has done nothing for her. I have offered everything I am and that I can to her to help. I know SHE has to want this.
Anyway, I have read a few posts and think this might be a good place for me to vent and get help.
Thanks for this resource, thanks for letting me get this off my chest and I thank you in advance for any knowledge you may impart and share with me.
Namaste
~Myrddin
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Welcome to SR!
2 things I suggest you do....
read "Co Dependent No More" by M. beattie
and fnd a local Al anon meeting for youself.
That's a free resource for those who love alcoholics.
Blessings to both of you
Thank you CarolD. I will look into the book. I posted in the family and friends of alcoholics forum with a question on Al Anon.
Maybe at this point, I should check them out, just so I can have somebody to talk too. Just not sure.
~Myrddin
Maybe at this point, I should check them out, just so I can have somebody to talk too. Just not sure.
~Myrddin
I can't imagine how frustrated and powerless over this situation you must feel. I hope you will check out the family and friends of alcoholics support forum. Others are in the same pain you are in right now. Best wishes to both you and your love. -Kathleen
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