Akire2987

Hello everyone. Well today I am 50 days sober. It seems like it went by so fast. I notice myself going through stages lately. I grieved the loss of my old lifestyle and friends. I'm going through so many transitions with my family and boyfriend. Some days I feel like I'm having a mental relapse, but I refuse to pick up a single pill again.
So basically I need some feedback about an upcoming event. My grandparents are paying for my entire family to take a trip to Canada to stay at a lodge for a family weekend. I'm very excited but nervous as well. I'm nervous about answering everyones questions since I haven't seen many family members since I've gotten clean. I"m mostly worried because there are like 5 different bars at this lodge. I know that a fair amount of my family will be drinking and asking me why I am not. I plan to tell them that I don't drink anymore...end of story. Well my boyfriend and I will be sharing a room with my sister and she will be drinking. He doesn't drink. I told her that when we go she is free to do as she pleases but I've asked her to please just not drink in the room and she had no complaints.
I don't want to worry about all this. I just want to have a good time. And I don't want others to feel like I'm trying to spoil their trip. I don't want my family to feel like they need to treat me different or tiptoe around me. But I need to be aware and prepared for triggers. Am I being cautious or too picky? And when and where do i draw the line?

Dee74

It won't be easy, but I'm presuming you want to go, I'm guessing your bf is supportive,and I'm assuming you feel confident enough to do this.

Triggers, whatever they may be, don't have to end in us drinking.

You don't want to worry about it and you want to have a good time ?
Do that

D

kj3880

We always think that others are worried about us, but prolly they won't really notice if you don't drink, nor will they care, most likely. Everyone is actually thinking about themselves more than you most of the time, really. So drink a soda with lemon in it, and they won't notice. It sounds like a lot of fun, a free vacation!
KJ

vegibean

I don't think I've ever heard of anyone being too "picky" about their sobriety. KUDOS TO YOU!!!!!!!!! I have boundaries today with anyone that is drinking/using, I have to have them. It's for me, not them. The worse is to say that you wouldn't go at all, but you know what? You have choices everyday and you're the one that has to live with them, not everyone else.

I have no problem with anyone drinking and doing their thing, I just know what I can be around, what I cannot, and what I will ask others to please not do around me. If so, I can always leave.

I think you did great!!!!!

least

I don't think you're being too picky at all. You sound very cautious and sensible to me, planning for what might be so as to avoid any dangerous surprises. You're making perfect sense to me, Keep moving forward!

bostonluv

I agree with everyone else. Thinking about these situations ahead of time is always a good idea. Your game plan sounds totally reasonable (i.e. please don't drink in "our" room). Have fun!

Aysha

I agree with kj..All eyes probably wont be on you. And definately wont when your not stumbling drunk.
Just be yourself..act normal but dont let your guard down. If your sister didnt have any complaints..Thats great. So dont worry.
Often times we send vibes in which people respond. If you dont make it into a super touchy..treat me different kind of thing. Most likely it wont be that way.

Congrats on 50 days. and have fun.

Horselover

Akire - Congratulations and kudos to you for planning on telling the family straight up, "I don't drink anymore!" I think that's great. It doesn't leave room for them to try and "convince" you to have just one. I think honesty is the answer. Also love the fact that you're having a game plan before you head out. You are very wise and doing a wonderful job. Have fun and relax and be proud of yourself. I definitely would if I were you!

Akire2987

Thank you all for your amazing feedback. You never let me down. I feel more confident. And I know I'll have fun. I don't want to get too touchy with it all. I just want to relax. And I think it will be inspiring in a sad way to watch others drink and make fools of themselves and know that I'm past that. And I'm not going back. I feel relieved to know that now I'm worrying about how to take care of myself, and before I would be worrying about my pill supply. Everyday is a journey in itself. Thanks again everybody.

coffeenut

I had a HUGE family reunion at 2 months sober. I was scared to death. The entire family drinks a lot. I just said I wasn't drinking. Noone said a word!

I ended up really enjoying myself for about the first time at a family function.

NoelleR

Goodonya Akire2987 ----

Sounds like lots of fun, but as others have said....be sure you have a plan....just in case it gets a bit dicey.....

Just one thing to remember ----
"...Well my boyfriend and I will be sharing a room with my sister and she will be drinking. He doesn't drink. I told her that when we go she is free to do as she pleases but I've asked her to please just not drink in the room and she had no complaints..." ---- even though she's agreed so far, just be prepared in case she changes her mind (or forgets, due to booze....?)...

So, go, and have a great....SOBER....time....!


NoelleR