Akire2987

Hello Everyone...44 days sober and feeling pretty bad today. Well my family has recently found out that someone has been stealing my great-grandmothers pain pills and of course my family thinks it was me. In the past I have stolen pills from her to feed my addiction and now that it really wasnt me I have so many emotions. First off I'm offended that they suspect me even though I can't really blame them since I need to build back up trust in them. And secondly, I'm pissed that someones stealing her pills. Best part is is that it could be one of her aides or nurses. So of course my mother searched my purse. (mind you i'm 21 living at home) So to ease her mind I let her. However, I couldn't stop my emotions from flowing. I just started crying and tried hiding my face behind the laptop. So after all that went down, I went shopping with my sister. When I came home my mother told me that she feels like she needs to tiptoe around me concerning my recovery. And that's exactly how I don't want her to feel. I've explained to her what I need from them and I don't think that I've been expecting too much. It's just so hard. Its hard to feel like I'm being treated differently now because I'm in recovery. And of course things are going to be different, but I guess that I don't want people to feel like I'm inconveniencing them. I feel like i upset people if I ask them not to use substances around me, or to even keep them in house. But if they want them best for me, then what's so difficult? I'm just in a rut. I'm still very motivated in my recovery. I'm also currently taking 2 8mg of Suboxone daily, so I'm ok. I guess I'm just having trouble with all these new transitions within my family. They can't understand. They try to and I think I'm relying on them for too much support. Sorry if I'm rambling but I needed to vent. *Erika*

Anna

Hi Akire,

Welcome!

You're right, your family will have a hard time understanding your addiction. That's the reason that many of us come here, because we do understand. You're also right that you have to regain trust that you have lost in the past and it's not fun. Ultimately your recovery is in your hands. It's great if your family supports you, but having expectations about what they should do, could lead to disappointment on your part. It sounds like your family wants to help you and you're lucky to have that. If you can be patient with them, that will really help things.

IO Storm

Welcome to SR Akire!

Congrats on 44 days of maintenance..

I am sorry you are going through this tough time. Emotions are raw, and we

need support..but the first person one will suspect is of course, the addict.

It takes time for the family to regain trust. I know this from my own

experience. Some forgave easily, others still have not. And that is their

problem. But the the trust part is difficult. Give them time. It is all

part of owning up to the pain we have caused others. Just focus on

your program and let them handle their own business, and things will

work out in due time. It will.

Hugs, and good luck!

Sherry