uncertainty

I have recently been going to Alanon meetings. I go to one meeting a week, and have been attending the same meeting. I have been doing this for 4 weeks. I know that I feel in many ways "broken", and I understand that. However, it seems like most of the people in the meeting have that same demeanor. They are slouched over and seem so defeated. I was hoping to encounter some really positive people that have been through similiar situations and are doing great!!! This is not a newcomers meeting, can someone tell me if this is a general feeling at meetings? Should I try a different meeting? I dont want to give up, but it is discouraging and scary to see how painful it still is for people that have been working the program for years.... then again, I wonder if it is just me, becausse for once I am finally having to take off that "everything is alright" lying smile and face some difficult truths.

Barbara52

I don't go to AlAnon but it seems common sense that if the meeting you go to isn't fitting your needs, find another one.

cmc

Due to how Al-Anon operates using the twelve tradtions, a particular meeting can and will change to suit the needs of the group. My onetime family group has an entire different focus since I first attended six years ago.
I would try at least a few more to see what they're like- choose one for a home base and use the others as needed.

LarryATL

I agree that you should try other Alanon groups as well if possible. My home group has several "upbeat" people who have lots of recovery under their belt..... they are an inspiration to me. Each group and meeting has a different "feel" to it, so you might want to shop around a bit if there are other meetings you could try.

Larry

rkymtncowboy

I agree, find another meeting. All the ones I have been to are totally different. Some are super excellent and some have a bunch of A's hogging all the time (Sorry A's). I suppose the A's are alanon because they were with another A.

Daisy30

yes, don't get discouraged. I remember those first few meetings. I think I was in a daze

Give it some time. try a few others, keep going regularly and don't give up.
It works if you work it

coyote21

Yes...try several. Alanon has saved my sanity. I have been attending 2-3 per week for two and a half years, and the longer I go the better I feel.

Our group is full of love and laughter. I also have been to the "others" as you describe them.. I don't think those would have been much help to me. By the way I was "sentenced" to Alanon by a very wise CPS judge. I will be forever in her debt.

I feel like I'm REALLY living life for the first time in all my years.

Alonon keeps me emotionally and spiritualy sober.

I have an awsome higher power that takes EXCELLENT care of me and my little girl. He loves me like I love her. I met him in Alanon! HA!

Thanks and God bless us all,:ghug
Coyote

Spiritual Seeker

I've had some really good times with people I've met through al-anon...
both in and out the the mtgs.
The mtgs. have helped me open up and communicate on an emotional level.
The 12 steps have been a blue print for change that is working.

Now that my son is in recovery, we speak the same lang.
Try another mtg. to see if that group fits better.