Horselover

You don't have to read this, but I am very close to having a drink. I never dealt well with stress and I am a HUGE animal lover. I wrote awhile back about a neighbor lady that was leaving her dog out in all kinds of weather. I thought we had found a solution but then all H E __ __ broke loose and she's back to her same old behavior. My husband went over yesterday to her house because I was so beside myself. We have been getting thunderstorms like crazy wild lately and the lady now has 2 dogs that she is leaving outside all the time. He said to her "I would like you to go outside and stand out there. If you can stand it then fine and if you can't what makes you think your dogs can." They were staring inside at her from the sliding glass door and its starting to hail now. Did she let them in? No she went and called a neighbor. My husband didn't threaten or harm her and never would. He came home and we finally, after months of trying to talk this out with her, called animal control.

Well animal control came out and she fed him a poor me story and how she's this and that of dog ownership and they fell head over heals for her. God knows what she told them about me because when I called the officer was VERY cool towards me and actually hung up on me. I called back and she spoke civil to me and said those dogs have the biggest dog house in New Mexico. That's a damn Gazebo by the way, which isn't enclosed and even if it was would not be proper shelter. We get snow in the winter here. It gets cold here. Ms. Neighbor lady said she would have the bottom of it enclosed and the officer said that's fine. She also lied and claimed to be bringing the dogs in at night. Big fat lie!! If she was taking care of them would I care? Would I be desparately trying to figure out how to turn this over to God. I can't and I'm in tears because I can't. I have done everything. I befriended her and by the way she knows I am an alcoholic and probably, most likely, told the officer that. I know stupid, stupid me!! I tried reasoning with her. I tried the legal avenue. I'm done and I feel like the only thing I want to do now is bury my head in a bottle of wine and forget the whole damn world.

How can someone take in a pet, an abused pet at that, and treat them so miserably?? What's the deal? What's the deal when I pray to God to please take this off my plate its still staring me in the big fat ugly face. Can you tell I could spit nails right now.

Done!

lostbutterfly

Hi horselover. I love animals too, and it makes me angry. I am very picky about who I tell that I am an addict/alcoholic. People judge you and use it against you, people who have idea what it's about.
I don't know what to suggest, just wanted you to know I was thinking of you.

Lenina

How people can have "pets" and abuse them amazes me. It's just awful However, it is just as awful if you abuse your body with alcohol. Punch a pillow, beat the bed with a tennis racket, get the anger out another way instead of drinking.

For me, there was never a situation that drinking didn't make worse.

Hang in there!

Love,

Lenina

TryingSoHard

Aw honey...

I can totally understand your frustration, but it is no reason for you to sabotage your own progress and well-being. DO NOT let her lack of judgment belittle your efforts.

I personally think you did the right thing by calling Animal Control, and I encourage you to KEEP CALLING THEM if the problem persists. You can tell them what you see - you can provide pictures if they need that kind of evidence (assuming you have a camera) - just DO NOT let her get the best of you! You're doing so well and nothing she can do can take that away from you.

Come here. Talk to us. Post. Call Animal Control. Vent to other neighbors and ask for help. WHATEVER IT TAKES. Do not un-do all your hard work because of her.

*HUGS*

IO Storm

HL..

However distressing this is to you...(I would be fighting mad as well)...

you know drinking won't solve a darn thing! It won't save a hair of those

poor dogs, and it will undo the progress and hard work you have made

thus far in your recovery. I think this is what you want to hear from

us. My thoughts are with you, HL...

You can't control that woman....I just wish I could help you think of another

solution. But I know this. Drinking is never the answer. I have tried that

before..many times. And it never worked for me.

Hugs.

TTOSBT

Ok honey, breathe. There is never a good reason to drink. And you are of no help to anyone if you do.
Why don't you begin a file?
I would start taking pictures and video of the dogs out in the rain.
Do any other neighbors notice or the postman or anyone? If so, get statements.
There are steps to take and NONE of them involve wine
{HUGS}

IO Storm

Great advice from TTOSBT...

Toomutch

I am saddened by the poor treatment of the dogs Horselover. As trying said, I think you did the right thing by calling animal control and I would encourage you to keep calling.

Now as far as drinking: It would solve nothing, it would hurt you, it wouldn't do the dogs next door any good, nor would it help you out with taking care of your own animals.

My thought and prayers are with you and the neighbor dog.

Bamboozle

Horselover...I'm sorry you're going through this...You know that if you drink, you'll have to deal with the guilt on top of everything else...

This planet is full of terrible things...it's not easy to stand back and watch, but you've done everything you can...

You can only control yourself and you did the right thing by calling animal control. If animal control can't (or won't) handle it, please do not tear yourself apart. Step back and find someone who can give you a hug.

Horselover

Okay. Here's the thing friends. Animal Control Officer not so friendly told me once she gets the gazebo enclosed on the 3 sides she has complied. So when I am washing my dishes and looking out the window and its snowing and the dogs are out there she's snug and warm in her house I can't call because according to law they dogs have shelter. BS! Where's the warmth under there? No I can't control that woman and I can't make God do anything either and its bugging the you know what out of me. I used to handle it with a drink.

The thing that broke the camel's back between the lady and us is she is a chronic liar. She told me she was a retired priest (thus I confessed my alcoholism - still beating myself up there because trust has always been an issue. I guess I thought I could trust a priest). She told us a bunch of things and one by one they turned out to be lies. I want to be done with her period, but I can't ignore the dogs. Its staring me in the face when I wake up and when I go to bed. About the chronic lies, she told the officer the same stuff and of course, like I did, the officer bought it hook, line and sinker. We feel for the elderly and I felt she was genuine. I can't read people well can I?

My husband was really mostly sick and tired of my "obsession" as he called it with the dogs. That's what made him take action. I felt better when we took action and then it all fell by the wayside.

Horselover

I know drinking won't solve it, but I just feel like its too much to deal with and what did I always do with that situation? Drink.

TryingSoHard

Ok... you say "once she gets the gazebo enclosed"... what about until then? Doesn't that count for anything? How long are they giving her for that, do you know? And once the enclosure is complete I am SURE there are still things that will count as abuse/neglect. That's what cameras are for. And if you can get any other neighbors to collaborate your story, that will surely help.

Regardless... don't let it drag YOU down! You've come too far. You've done so much good in your own life. It's frustrating, yes... but it's not life-changing for YOU.

HANG IN THERE. We love you and support you.

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

Boy, I totally understand how you are feeling. That you can't control the outcome no matter how hard you try. Here's what works for me so that I don't pick up that wine glass:

Acceptance. Yup, I know it sucks. You did the right thing by calling animal control. You did what you had to do in your heart. It didn't work out the way you wanted it to, that's for sure, so, now you have to hand it up to your HP and trust that It knows what It's doing. I sit back, get centered, pray (you can meditate if you aren't a praying sort) and work towards acceptance of the situation.

Life will be good, bad, and in between and us alkies must learn to go with it. Drinking is not an option.

xo

Lenina

Very wise words from NOMOMERLOTMAMMA! Thank you.

Love,

Lenina

Horselover

Thanks Trying, but this does feel big to me. I wish I could close the blinds and ignore it, but that's not me. I am sorry to unload all this, but husband isn't home and won't be for another 2 hours and I had to vent. He's pretty damn sick of me and hearing about this and maybe I am too focused on it, but how do I recenter my focus my attention? I know there is no quick cure. I talked twice to the officer and she wouldn't tell me how long she has to comply. This officer bought her story and I am telling you I couldn't say the lady isn't being truthful because she wouldn't have believed me. I am sure I am the awful vindictive neighbor and as far as the other neighbors, we've lived here for 1 year and she's been here 25 years and knows everyone. The neighbor that called last night seemed embarrassed to be involved, but he agreed to let animal control handle it. Whatever good that did.

Lenina

Keep coming here to vent rather than drink. We understand! Some very wise words have been posted by others far more eloquent than me. Take them to heart!

Love to you.

Lenina

Horselover

The acceptance part is what's got me going crazy. How can I believe that my HP would want something like this to continue??

SelfSeeking

HL, I just wanted to let you know I'm really sorry for this painful situation. *hugs* People are hard to understand sometimes.

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

Well, why is there war? People starving? Folks murdered? Why is my roof leaking?

I don't know.

I can make myself sick worrying about it, tearing myself up, OR I can realize that this is life. Imperfect as it is, and I don't think any of us will know why until we're dead. And THAT'S a big maybe.

See what I'm saying?

It will be resolved, but not by your timetable hon. Acceptance.

Dee74

Like Nomo said - 'life will be good, bad, and in between and us alkies must learn to go with it.' and not only us alkies - everyone.

We all know that.

There's a lot of things I'm puzzled why God lets happen.
I have to accept these things are beyond my understanding.

D