Ophiuchus

Hello Everyone
I have made a commitment to myself to work the Twelve steps, I call them my path to enlightenment. Right now I am working on the resentment phase of the Forth step and have pretty much "Brick Walled". Reflecting back upon my using life I burned people and people burned me, I always consider that to be part and parcel of the lifestyle I was living, I carried no animosity toward anyone for any extended period of time, (they hadn't done anything different to me than I would have done to them). Throughout life I have always been a been a forgive and forget type of person, is it possible not to have any resentments at all ? Is it possible to have resentments buried so deeply that you can't find them within yourself ? Maybe I just don't understand what a resentment is.
If anyone has any experience with this I would greatly appreciate your insight help.
B.

bostonluv

I don't work the steps but wanted to chime in as I am also a forgive and forget type person. I screw up often and so it's easy for me to forgive others as I always hope to be forgiven. I have a couple resentments though that I can think of. Not indivuduals so much but certain types of people...if that makes sense?

Anna

I'm not an AA person, but I have dealt with my resentments since I began my recovery. I do think it's possible to not harbor any resentments, if that's the type of person that you are. I would wonder though, if there are some deep issues. I find it interesting, that every once in a while, a memory flits through my mind, and I realize it's a resentment that I was holding onto, but had completely forgotten about. Now I am much less likely to feel resentment about things happening in my life.

JenPooh

I can totally relate to you!!! i have the same feelings... when we are drinking ALL of the time, your concience slowly fades away and and you give what you get. its so easy to fall into that me me me world and still care about others but, its easy to push them in the back of our minds, because we, of course, come first... so i feel as if it would totally be unfare to hold animosity against what others have done to me because more then likely i have done it to someone else. I look at my life, and really have to work first things first... even back to before i was drinking so heavily, and really deal with the most minor affairs, and others soon mysteriously unfold
Good luck... and congrats on working on your fourth step!

AW2486

If you cut me off in traffic and flip me off.. I will get very angry.. That is not a resentment.

When I see you the next day, replay what happened the day before, and get angry all over again. That's a resentment.

All a resentment is .. re-feeling old hurts.

Perhaps if you don't feel angry at anybody.. Do you feel annoyed by anybody or anything?