can I do the program online ?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 9
can I do the program online ?
Hi
I am not totally new to AA but I have been out of it for well over a year and I do know where my local meetings are and I can use them as a focal point to get from day to day to stay sober in the day and they are a very useful tool but when it comes to the program there is no tool there for me to use.
Whether its my inability to mix with people when I am sober or my tendency to relapse the moment I begin to feel a little better there just isnt anyone available to help me in person and I must say I do not feel comfortable in myself having a f2f sponsor and I want to be able to do some work online via books or my pc or via the forum.
It may change later if I see myself sober for some period of time and then something or someone may appear and I may be able to take the step forward in person so until then I want to do work because I desperately want to stay sober and recover and as I was reading earlier in someone elses post I am trying to stay sober using the same tools I use to get drunk and of course thats always going to lead me getting drunk.
BTW I am only a single day sober and I have a very bad tendency to hit the bottle harder on the second day than I do on the first day, its like I am making up for not drinking for a day.
Any practical advice on where to go from here would be very welcome
Thank you
I am not totally new to AA but I have been out of it for well over a year and I do know where my local meetings are and I can use them as a focal point to get from day to day to stay sober in the day and they are a very useful tool but when it comes to the program there is no tool there for me to use.
Whether its my inability to mix with people when I am sober or my tendency to relapse the moment I begin to feel a little better there just isnt anyone available to help me in person and I must say I do not feel comfortable in myself having a f2f sponsor and I want to be able to do some work online via books or my pc or via the forum.
It may change later if I see myself sober for some period of time and then something or someone may appear and I may be able to take the step forward in person so until then I want to do work because I desperately want to stay sober and recover and as I was reading earlier in someone elses post I am trying to stay sober using the same tools I use to get drunk and of course thats always going to lead me getting drunk.
BTW I am only a single day sober and I have a very bad tendency to hit the bottle harder on the second day than I do on the first day, its like I am making up for not drinking for a day.
Any practical advice on where to go from here would be very welcome
Thank you
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Southern New Hampshire
Posts: 746
My observation is that folks who won't engage in some form of direct contact with alcoholics don't stay sober. I'm not saying it doesn't happen at all, but I've never seen it. Good luck to you.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
What I know is that sobreity takes a lot of work.
I am not an AA person and have been sober for quite awhile by using books, SR and doing a lot of daily hard work.
I'm glad you found us!
I am not an AA person and have been sober for quite awhile by using books, SR and doing a lot of daily hard work.
I'm glad you found us!
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 700
Originally Posted by bodmin2008 
I want to be able to do some work online via books or my pc or via the forum.
http://silkworth.net/freestuff.html
If you don't have a big book to follow along with
http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_tableofcnt.cfm
or
http://anonpress.org/bb/
Like others have said. The power of the AA fellowship is a great support. But the program is in the book. I use both.
Best of Luck
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 9
well seeing as how its free to post here i will go ahead and post because i am beginning to freak out yet again, everything is the same every day i set off with the best of intentions and because of the actions of another person whatever i attempt to do ends up in chaos
and i am not joking its everything i touch where i live is broken or damaged and i am simply trying to get washed to get a haircut and now feel like going to a pub and getting blotto once more
and no i have no way at all to live anywhere else, its every single day i just complained to the person who damages everything and they laughed at me, they find it bloody hilarious that i am angry because of what he does to stuff
i dont know if anyone else ever runs across this sort of thing but staying sober long enough to get to a meeting at night is only possible if i hide in a bedroom dont eat dont wash and dont venture outside because i just end up going mad every single time
well i am going to get washed anyway and hope and pray i actually do make it to the hairdressers cos my hair is a mess and i have been wanting to get my hair cut for a few weeks and all that ever happens is the same thing i end up mad at him and his filthy interfereing ways and i end up drinking because i cant control a single thing he does and for those who say dont try to control things i cannot go to a hairdressers smelling with skanky hair because they wouldnt cut my hair so i have to control some things
yeh yeh so i am complaining you would complain too if u had to put up with that filthy dirty disgusting thing
and i am not joking its everything i touch where i live is broken or damaged and i am simply trying to get washed to get a haircut and now feel like going to a pub and getting blotto once more
and no i have no way at all to live anywhere else, its every single day i just complained to the person who damages everything and they laughed at me, they find it bloody hilarious that i am angry because of what he does to stuff
i dont know if anyone else ever runs across this sort of thing but staying sober long enough to get to a meeting at night is only possible if i hide in a bedroom dont eat dont wash and dont venture outside because i just end up going mad every single time
well i am going to get washed anyway and hope and pray i actually do make it to the hairdressers cos my hair is a mess and i have been wanting to get my hair cut for a few weeks and all that ever happens is the same thing i end up mad at him and his filthy interfereing ways and i end up drinking because i cant control a single thing he does and for those who say dont try to control things i cannot go to a hairdressers smelling with skanky hair because they wouldnt cut my hair so i have to control some things
yeh yeh so i am complaining you would complain too if u had to put up with that filthy dirty disgusting thing
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
I think everybody runs into obstacles to sobriety and recovery.
I don't think anyone here would tell you that it's easy or smooth-sailing. It isn't.
Maybe you could focus on finding another place to live, getting some extra money to do so, or whatever it takes to get into a better living situation.
But, it all comes down to the desire to live a sober life and that it takes a lot of motivation.
I don't think anyone here would tell you that it's easy or smooth-sailing. It isn't.
Maybe you could focus on finding another place to live, getting some extra money to do so, or whatever it takes to get into a better living situation.
But, it all comes down to the desire to live a sober life and that it takes a lot of motivation.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 1,947
have you ever been to a treatment center? have you had more than one day without drinking? or should I say how long ago was that?
do you really want to quit or just wish you could quit?
just some rhetorical questions for you that struck me
my friend used to tell me that he could help me quit smoking....he said he'd take me in as a patient at his own clinic : the "Larry Burns' Duct tape therapy".
I can releate to having jto not get out of the house.
Oh one more thing that just struck me....you could go to a morning meeting to start a day off
do you really want to quit or just wish you could quit?
just some rhetorical questions for you that struck me
my friend used to tell me that he could help me quit smoking....he said he'd take me in as a patient at his own clinic : the "Larry Burns' Duct tape therapy".
I can releate to having jto not get out of the house.
Oh one more thing that just struck me....you could go to a morning meeting to start a day off
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Somewhere out there
Posts: 191
Bodmin,
I'm truly sory you are having such a hard time, but first things first. Do not drink today!! Just take it five minutes at a time. If you feel the urge, come back here and "chat". We are all here for you. There are a variety of programs out there which include counseling, etc. I would recommend you attend a face to face AA meeting, but use whatever tools are at your disposal.
Again, SR is here for you. You can do it!
Tom
I'm truly sory you are having such a hard time, but first things first. Do not drink today!! Just take it five minutes at a time. If you feel the urge, come back here and "chat". We are all here for you. There are a variety of programs out there which include counseling, etc. I would recommend you attend a face to face AA meeting, but use whatever tools are at your disposal.
Again, SR is here for you. You can do it!
Tom
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Sweden
Posts: 1,649
Bodmin, I can completely relate. I have two older teenage sons who don't help around the house, my younger sasses me back sometimes when I ask for help. They trash out my kitchen and the rest of the house. My husband is an uninvolved, uninterested and distant parent who has never set limits for them nor demanded that they help around the house.
Naturally, this situation makes me angry and anger is one of the prime issues I am working on in my recovery.
But, I know this may be hard to accept, difficult and intolerable situations and environments do not make people into alcoholics. We simply are alcoholics, and I know, when I am honest with myself, I would still drink even if I had two perfect angels for kids and a perfect husband. I would drink to celebrate. Hee.
I used to drink to try and soothe the anger I felt about this home situation, but instead, it made me more angry. Toss a glass of alcohol on a flame, and well, it will certainly not douse it. c
How valuable are these objects that are being broken? Probably not very valuable. You are the valuable element in this equation, and your recovery. Material things don't matter.
I would suggest planning on simple changes of habit every day. If you feel you can't handle being in that environment too long, find someplace to take a breather: a long walk, a coffee shop, anything. The local library.
Good luck, you can do this!
Naturally, this situation makes me angry and anger is one of the prime issues I am working on in my recovery.
But, I know this may be hard to accept, difficult and intolerable situations and environments do not make people into alcoholics. We simply are alcoholics, and I know, when I am honest with myself, I would still drink even if I had two perfect angels for kids and a perfect husband. I would drink to celebrate. Hee.
I used to drink to try and soothe the anger I felt about this home situation, but instead, it made me more angry. Toss a glass of alcohol on a flame, and well, it will certainly not douse it. c
How valuable are these objects that are being broken? Probably not very valuable. You are the valuable element in this equation, and your recovery. Material things don't matter.
I would suggest planning on simple changes of habit every day. If you feel you can't handle being in that environment too long, find someplace to take a breather: a long walk, a coffee shop, anything. The local library.
Good luck, you can do this!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Windsor,Canada
Posts: 15
Thanks
I just wanted to say thanks bodmin2008 for posting !!! I to am only 2 days sober and feeling alot of anxiety and trying to deal with my living situation !!! If you woundn't have posted i woundn't have gotten to read all these posts that in 5 mins. have made me feel a little better about where i'm at. So thanks again to all who posted .
Justin
Justin
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