goinginsane

I am new here, already posted my first thread here, describing how for two years I have been an enabler. Although at times, I have put my foot down and said NO! Thats when the relationship ended. Duh! I was being used! No point in brooding over someone who was with me for what I could do(get) for them. Nevertheless, sad thing about being an enabler is you begin to fall in love with them. A very vicious cycle. Lose self respect and agree to be treated as a doormat. I was never desperate, but don't know how I ended up being an enabler. Poor choices. Breakups always have their share of unanswered questions, but I'm also hit with "withdrawal" from her (after taking the enable drug). People mention about detach with love, I have tried to read about them on the sticky, but never did get what it means. How can I wish her luck and not "crave" for her anymore?

MsPINKAcres

((goinginsane))

I posted in the friends & family of alcoholics a reading from How Al-Anon Works about detachment - if you have that book - the entire chapter is great on information about detachment, love and forgiveness - not just for them but also for ourselves.

Wishing Serenity, Joy & Love,
Rita