Laciemae

Ok, I am discovering that this is a whole lot harder than, "i am going to quit drinking today. or I am not going to drink today" This has been a problem for 6 years, so it isn't going to change overnight. I don't have anyone to talk to that would understand or could probably even help me. My hubby just says "you need to cut back on your drinking" My husband also drinks too much, but he seems to be able to control it a lot better than me, although I see his is getting worse too, probably by being around me. I would love to get into therapy, but what I have sought out here in my small town isn't going to work out. I feel like I need to do something more than I am doing now to help me, but I just don't know what. I haven't been to AA here and I am pretty afraid to check that out.

smallRaccoon

hi Laciemae.... your not alone!! i also have 6 years of heavy drinking and have been trying to stop for months. I also thought that I could just say "meh, no more drinking"...but soon realize the next day back to square one.

this thread has helped me alot: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html

you can see others trying to stop and how many days they achieve, very inspiring

scaredykat

Hi Laciemae,

I know what you mean about stopping drinking. It is scary deciding what to do. As for AA if you decided to check them out you don't have to do anything or even say anything if you don't want to. Just sit and listen. Free coffee too.

Keep reading and posting on here. There's a lot of good information on here and a lot of good people on here willing to help.

Barb

HideorSeek

Hi Laciemae!

It is hard and it does take awhile to feel the fruits of your labor. At least for me, once I get a few days (past day 3 which is a "hurdle" for me), I feel like I have banked some time and don't want to lose it. That's a source of inspiration for me. The other thing which has helped me immensely this time around (hopefully my last) is to "buddy-up" with someone who is at the same point (day) that I am. We PM and check in with each other frequently. I am vested in her sobriety and she is in mine. We're connected. Whenever I feel the "urge", I don't want to let her down, so I grit me teeth and keep going. Isolation is one of the cornerstones of this disease, so anything you can do to "connect" with another alcoholic is great. I go to AA as well, and that also is a part of my sobriety puzzle as is therapy and posting on SR. What I'm trying to say is that these things work for ME. What you need to figure out is what is inspiring, supportive and helpful for YOU and go from there. We're all here for you!

thinktoomuch

You aren't alone Laciemae!

CarolD

I was shocked to discover that I could not simply
quit when I desperately wanted too.
I never knew which drink or what day I slid into alcoholism.

Many alcoholics need to consult with a doctor
before quitting abruptly. Have you considered that?

Blessings to you and your family

Laciemae

Thank you for all the kind words and encouragement. Carol - that is exactly what I am thinking! Although I have a pretty good idea when I can pin point where it changed from social drinking to alcoholism. But it should be easy to just NOT drink and it isn't. I have actually called my doctor this week, but he is on vacation. I think I need to own up to the fact that I am an alcoholic and not just a woman who drinks too much or "has a problem with alcohol". I am probably the only one who doesn't already know that.
I am worried for my son too, who is nearly 24. He doesn't drink every day, but when he drinks on the week-ends he literally can consume an entire 1/5th of Southern Comfort. And I have seen him drink more than that. He is a big man, but still. I have tried to tell him that both his Mom and Dad are alcoholics, so he already has tendencies, but he is at the age he thinks he is cute. I also feel like who am I to try and tell him!

four812

hi Laciemae

thanks for your post...IF you can give it a little whirl, and NOT drink no matter what you can get through a few days....hope to keep seeing your thoughts here, and if you can muster up the courage to check out an AA meeting then try it....you truly don't have to share anything. Often people "pass" when it's their turn and just listen.

gypsytears

Hi Lacimae . Check your pms. I hope it helps a little. I'm glad to see you posting and reaching out... that's important IMO.

mle-sober

Hi Laciemae,

Welcome to SR. Being here and reading and posting helps me immensely - and was especially important in my first few months.

I am an AA person and have found that I have a second family there. My sponsor, the steps and the meetings have all been important to me. And pivital in helping me think through the issues for myself and figure out how I'm going to be in this world without alcohol.

I also found some good books (and workbooks!) that helped me. Look at the self help section of your library or book store or search online for books for alcoholism. There's a lot out there.

I hope you find the strength and courage and support you need and deserve.

Anna

Hi Laci,

Welcome!

I was totally shocked to find that I couldn't stop drinking when I wanted to. I had decided to start drinking to self-medicate, so, therefore, I should be able to stop. It was a lot more difficult than that.

You know that the best thing you can do for your son is to set an example of how to live a sober life.

Laciemae

It is almost bed time and I am not drinking. I can make two more hours. Really glad I through out everything this morning, cuz I am really thinking about it. But bottom line is, that I am not going to get drunk tonight.

CarolD

This is the time for you to focus on you
Sons and husbands are secondary to your needs for now.

Here are excerpts from the book that I consider
the best "handbook" on alcoholism.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html

...I used that information
combined it with God and Aa
and have not had another drink.

You are doing fantastic...keep posting

Laciemae

Thanks. I don't have anybody to reach out to right now, except here. Except my daughter and I feel bad reaching out to a 28 year old daughter regarding her mom's problems. But she is the most supportive and understanding . . . . . . . .

winwin

Laciemae- Glad you made it through the day. Just keep coming back here. This site has been a blessing to me. I don't have anyone to talk to neither so when I feel like I want to drink, I just get on here, read, and write. It has kept me from relapsing. I've been sober for record time.

Welcome to your new group of friends to talk to.

CarolD

i understand your point and of course she wants to help.
However...
only another alcoholic truly understands how difficult
our drinking had become and how glorious recovery can be.

That's my experience and why SR and AA continue
to be vital resources for me.....

It can be the same for you...we can and do win over alcohol.