gns

I use them and get them when it comes to other areas of my life. I knew I would the job I interviewed for and I would be there around 5 yrs. I was. I knew I would be working with this woman we were interviewing - she will probably take the job.

I am not so sure it works so well with men. I thought I would marry this last SO.

Can you share your experiences with your gut feelings? When do they work for you and when do they not seem to work for you?

prodigal

The only time my gut instincts or feelings don't work for me is when I IGNORE them. Results? I married two raging alkies. One of them hit me and was downright scarey. The other one is just a walking shell who has brain damage.

The positive side of ignoring my gut instincts is that I LEARNED THE HARD WAY to see the red flags, hear my inner warning (or radar system) telling me to tread carefully and carry a big stick! LOL!!!

But most of all, I learned a sense of balance. I can be cautious without being paranoid. I can be discerning without being too suspicious. I can give trust when I feel someone has earned my trust. And I've learned to be true to my own "inner voice." We are individuals. Each of us has our own inner guidance system that is unique to us. My HP speaks to me in a way that I "hear." Somebody else gets the message that is tailored to their unique nature.

I learned to listen to that still, soft voice. And I had to make some MAJOR mistakes before I learned to sit down, shut up, and listen.

lovtolaff

I have a friend that told me the other day that my gut instinct is so right on target that it's pretty scary. But what do I do? Ignore it. At least I did in this last relationship. Ignored the HELL out of it. And you know what? Over the past week I've found out some information that proved to me that my gut has been right all along.

During this relationship I questioned my feelings and confused them with being paranoid. Not the case at all.

All I can say is...listen to that little voice. It KNOWS what it's talking about.

cagefree

Well put

Ever since I began my recovery of codependency, I realized I had an inner voice - gut feeling, if you will. Ever since, I have been working on turning up the volume.

I guess my latest gut feeling had to do with a date I went on and I kept asking my date if he was uncomfortable around me as his behaviour was showing all the signs. He acted completely intimidated. He claimed he wasn't several times over - but his actions were SCREAMING otherwise. Red Flag. Someone who can't be honest with himself won't be honest with me...this isn't going to work out.

Am I right? Was he really uncomfortable? My gut is telling so...that's all I need.

Barbara52

I am learning to trust my gut feelings. Perhaps its part of growing up in an alcoholic family but I didn't used to trust my gut feelings, trusted logic instead. Of course, although a good way to check things out, logic doesn't always work. Gut feelings don't either. But now I listen to them. I am coming to think that my gut feelings are a combination of my HP talking to me and my emotional self/subconscious speaking to me. And my gut feelings are becoming more acurate.

blah

exactly. before i even moved in with my exabf i wondered if he had a drinking problem. i remember once even looking in his freezer trying to figure out if it was the same bottle of vodka from last weekend or if he drank during the week. i shouldn't have ignored that.