Update!!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Texas
Posts: 178
Update!!!
HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!
My son is doing well , he is getting stronger and is doing very well so far. I am there with him every day and it is such a joy. He is such an angel and I can't wait to take him home and hold him.
I got a message online last night from my ex all he typed to me was, that he wants a paternity test. I was speechless and totally ignored it. Just another one of his abusive behaviors towards me only this time he did not get a reaction out of me, after all that is what this was all about.
Ignoring.......wow that is something I dislike very much. I feel to ignore a human being is just awful but now he has left me no choice in the matter.
It is sad that I have to do such a thing but I do not have any other choice. I tried everything to get him involved in my pregnancy and I still yet have to hear the words from hom just saying "how are you feeling ? how are the babies? do you need anything ? never not one time did he ask me that.and frankly I had enough a long time ago and that is why I walked in the 1st place.
Trust me girls......not being able to tell him that his son was born hurts me a lot. I am taking care of my son they way he should also take care of him. He choose not to a long time ago so be it.
Sometimes I wonder how he sleeps at night knowing there is me-pregnant with his children and he behaves like we don't excist...........it all feels totally evil and I am so glad I am away from this evil.
Love you guys!((((((((((HUG))))))))))))))))
My son is doing well , he is getting stronger and is doing very well so far. I am there with him every day and it is such a joy. He is such an angel and I can't wait to take him home and hold him.
I got a message online last night from my ex all he typed to me was, that he wants a paternity test. I was speechless and totally ignored it. Just another one of his abusive behaviors towards me only this time he did not get a reaction out of me, after all that is what this was all about.
Ignoring.......wow that is something I dislike very much. I feel to ignore a human being is just awful but now he has left me no choice in the matter.
It is sad that I have to do such a thing but I do not have any other choice. I tried everything to get him involved in my pregnancy and I still yet have to hear the words from hom just saying "how are you feeling ? how are the babies? do you need anything ? never not one time did he ask me that.and frankly I had enough a long time ago and that is why I walked in the 1st place.
Trust me girls......not being able to tell him that his son was born hurts me a lot. I am taking care of my son they way he should also take care of him. He choose not to a long time ago so be it.
Sometimes I wonder how he sleeps at night knowing there is me-pregnant with his children and he behaves like we don't excist...........it all feels totally evil and I am so glad I am away from this evil.
Love you guys!((((((((((HUG))))))))))))))))
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Prettywoman
I am so thrilled that the baby is doing well. What a special blessing he must be to you and my prayers go out every day for both of you.
It's probably hard to see right now, but I truly believe that you have beautiful days ahead of you and that the darkness you have been living in will soon only be a sad memory.
Look ahead and know that you and your baby will be okay and that you can both live happy healthy lives, one day at a time.
You have been through so much this past while. Take time to heal and look after yourself and know that we love you and care.
I am so thrilled that the baby is doing well. What a special blessing he must be to you and my prayers go out every day for both of you.
It's probably hard to see right now, but I truly believe that you have beautiful days ahead of you and that the darkness you have been living in will soon only be a sad memory.
Look ahead and know that you and your baby will be okay and that you can both live happy healthy lives, one day at a time.
You have been through so much this past while. Take time to heal and look after yourself and know that we love you and care.
Learning to love life...
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 529
Hi Prettywoman
I am so glad to hear that your son is doing well... I have an image of exactly what you go thru each time you visit him... from the 2 minute handwashing, the gown-wearing, the smell of the NICU - I remember it all. But somehow, as soon as we lay eyes on our child in their own little bed there, the negatives melt away. I KNOW how much you love your son... he knows it too. He is one of those "special" miracles that teach us so much.
It must be so frustrating to still have to deal with your ex, with all that is going on for you. And you're right, he is looking for reactions in you - his own "sick" way of still be connected to you. I am assuming you cannot deny him a paternity test... but if this was to occur, you would have to tell him what has happened with the babies; tell him about his new little son. Perhaps let a little time go by... If this is what he wants, than the onus is on him to make the preparations. I am guessing that deep down he KNOWS that he is the father... Unless he is very stubborn, he probably WON'T go thru with the paternity test.
Regardless of all of this... You are a very strong person - I don't have to tell you that! Rely on that strength to learn how to detach all over again. Your focus needs to be with you and your baby
Take care,
Meg
I am so glad to hear that your son is doing well... I have an image of exactly what you go thru each time you visit him... from the 2 minute handwashing, the gown-wearing, the smell of the NICU - I remember it all. But somehow, as soon as we lay eyes on our child in their own little bed there, the negatives melt away. I KNOW how much you love your son... he knows it too. He is one of those "special" miracles that teach us so much.
It must be so frustrating to still have to deal with your ex, with all that is going on for you. And you're right, he is looking for reactions in you - his own "sick" way of still be connected to you. I am assuming you cannot deny him a paternity test... but if this was to occur, you would have to tell him what has happened with the babies; tell him about his new little son. Perhaps let a little time go by... If this is what he wants, than the onus is on him to make the preparations. I am guessing that deep down he KNOWS that he is the father... Unless he is very stubborn, he probably WON'T go thru with the paternity test.
Regardless of all of this... You are a very strong person - I don't have to tell you that! Rely on that strength to learn how to detach all over again. Your focus needs to be with you and your baby
Take care,
Meg
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: fresno Ca
Posts: 68
Prettywoman,
I am so glad to hear that your baby boy is doing well. Lots of prayers have been sent your way. I will still keep you in my prayers. I left my oldest sons fathwer when I was 6 mos. pregnant because in a drunk rage he choked me on the ground. The next day I told him I was leaving. He went to work and came back with me gone, I left him a set of dishes and a T.V. stand. When these relationships turn toxic it is best for everyone involved to take a step back, Or a few miles back. Keep positive and know that you have more important issues like your baby boy. I am sure it hurts to think the person who said he cared about you shows no interest, but he is also a wounded soul and in no regards reflects your importance. YOU ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON TO YOUR BABIES!! You have the MOST important job in the world. Stay safe and keep your spirits up
Lots Of Hugs sent Your way,
maryl
I am so glad to hear that your baby boy is doing well. Lots of prayers have been sent your way. I will still keep you in my prayers. I left my oldest sons fathwer when I was 6 mos. pregnant because in a drunk rage he choked me on the ground. The next day I told him I was leaving. He went to work and came back with me gone, I left him a set of dishes and a T.V. stand. When these relationships turn toxic it is best for everyone involved to take a step back, Or a few miles back. Keep positive and know that you have more important issues like your baby boy. I am sure it hurts to think the person who said he cared about you shows no interest, but he is also a wounded soul and in no regards reflects your importance. YOU ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON TO YOUR BABIES!! You have the MOST important job in the world. Stay safe and keep your spirits up
Lots Of Hugs sent Your way,
maryl
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Ohio
Posts: 444
((((((Prettywoman)))))))
So glad to hear Wayne-Alexander is doing well. And I'm proud of you for ignoring the ex. When and if he ever deserves a response--I'm sure you'll give it to him. The right time will come. But for now, take care of you and the baby.
Lyn
Lyn
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