Language of Letting Go - May 15 - Taking Risks
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Language of Letting Go - May 15 - Taking Risks
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Taking Risks
Take a risk. Take a chance.
We do not have to indulge in obviously foolhardy or self-defeating risks, but we can allow ourselves to take positive risks in recovery. We cannot afford to keep ourselves paralyzed.
We do not have to keep ourselves stymied and trapped out of fear of making a mistake or failing. Naturally, we will make mistakes and fail from time to time. That's part of being fully alive. There are no guarantees. If we are waiting for guaranteed courses of action, we may spend much of our life waiting.
We do not have to shame ourselves or accept shame from anyone else, even those in recovery, for making mistakes. The goal of recovery is not to live life perfectly. The goal of recovery is to live, learn our lessons, and make overall progress.
Take a risk. Do not always wait for a guarantee. We don't have to listen to "I told you so." Dust yourself off after a mistake, and then move on to the success.
God, help me begin to take healthy risks. Help me let go of my fear of failure, and help me let go of my fear of success. Help me let go of my fear of fully living my life, and help me start experiencing all parts of this journey.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation
Taking Risks
Take a risk. Take a chance.
We do not have to indulge in obviously foolhardy or self-defeating risks, but we can allow ourselves to take positive risks in recovery. We cannot afford to keep ourselves paralyzed.
We do not have to keep ourselves stymied and trapped out of fear of making a mistake or failing. Naturally, we will make mistakes and fail from time to time. That's part of being fully alive. There are no guarantees. If we are waiting for guaranteed courses of action, we may spend much of our life waiting.
We do not have to shame ourselves or accept shame from anyone else, even those in recovery, for making mistakes. The goal of recovery is not to live life perfectly. The goal of recovery is to live, learn our lessons, and make overall progress.
Take a risk. Do not always wait for a guarantee. We don't have to listen to "I told you so." Dust yourself off after a mistake, and then move on to the success.
God, help me begin to take healthy risks. Help me let go of my fear of failure, and help me let go of my fear of success. Help me let go of my fear of fully living my life, and help me start experiencing all parts of this journey.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
When I first began this program, maybe 6 months into my recovery, I was feeling resistance from those around me because they saw this as real change and not a fleeting whim, and they saw that I had changed and they didn't quite know what to do with me. Old buttons like guilt and manipulation just didn't work anymore and they couldn't find a new button.
Their resistance wore on me, I had moments where I wondered myself if it was all worth it....and decided quickly that indeed "I" was worth it and people could just get used to me.
It took courage to change my ways, my thoughts and my actions. Sometimes it took baby steps to get where I was going. It took risking the love and loyalty of those who wanted a relationship with me and it was then that I realized that my "healthy" relationships would survive and anything less was not good for me anyway.
Take a risk, you ARE worth all the gifts recovery will bring to you.
Hugs
Their resistance wore on me, I had moments where I wondered myself if it was all worth it....and decided quickly that indeed "I" was worth it and people could just get used to me.
It took courage to change my ways, my thoughts and my actions. Sometimes it took baby steps to get where I was going. It took risking the love and loyalty of those who wanted a relationship with me and it was then that I realized that my "healthy" relationships would survive and anything less was not good for me anyway.
Take a risk, you ARE worth all the gifts recovery will bring to you.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: FL
Posts: 14,246
Thanks Ann, I know exactly what you mean. The pre-recovery 'me' surrounded myself with people who I enjoyed being friends and coworkers with, but once I changed, most were unwilling to accept me and our friendships faded or became strained. My recovery separated me from those who I was a loyal friend to and those who were 'my' true friends.
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