WantsOut's Declaration of Independence
Becoming a Butterfly
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 904
WantsOut's Declaration of Independence
I am free now.
I will no longer give my exAH free space in my head.
He was once my world, first in a good way, then in a not so good way.
It has been nearly two years since I kicked him out.
It has been 15 months since his DWI arrest.
For all this time, for nearly a decade, him and his drinking and our stilted love have been the major focus of my life.
The time I've wasted, the money I've lost, the jobs I've lost, all because of my inability to be Me has been a shame. But I will not dwell on that either.
I cannot change the past. It is over and there is no sense on living in a world that exists only in human memory.
I cannot live in the future either because anything could happen between now and then. I can plan, but I cannot live in the "what will be" place.
I have today. Beautiful today. A place that exists in a concrete way, where my actions have power, where my heart is alive.
No longer will I cry. No longer will I cringe. No longer will I live for what was. I will depend on Me.
I am done with everthing and now I am Me - and I deserve no less than to be happy, to be secure, to feel good, and to go on with my life the way that I see fit.
From now on I AM.
Goodbye my friends. You've done more for me here than you will ever know.
I will no longer give my exAH free space in my head.
He was once my world, first in a good way, then in a not so good way.
It has been nearly two years since I kicked him out.
It has been 15 months since his DWI arrest.
For all this time, for nearly a decade, him and his drinking and our stilted love have been the major focus of my life.
The time I've wasted, the money I've lost, the jobs I've lost, all because of my inability to be Me has been a shame. But I will not dwell on that either.
I cannot change the past. It is over and there is no sense on living in a world that exists only in human memory.
I cannot live in the future either because anything could happen between now and then. I can plan, but I cannot live in the "what will be" place.
I have today. Beautiful today. A place that exists in a concrete way, where my actions have power, where my heart is alive.
No longer will I cry. No longer will I cringe. No longer will I live for what was. I will depend on Me.
I am done with everthing and now I am Me - and I deserve no less than to be happy, to be secure, to feel good, and to go on with my life the way that I see fit.
From now on I AM.
Goodbye my friends. You've done more for me here than you will ever know.
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