Language of Letting Go - April 17 - Taking Care of Ourselves
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
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Language of Letting Go - April 17 - Taking Care of Ourselves
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Taking Care of Ourselves
We often refer to recovery from codependency and adult child issues as self-care. Self-care is not, as some may think, a spin off of the Me generation. It isn't self-indulgence. It isn't selfishness - in the negative interpretation of that word.
We're learning to take care of ourselves, instead of obsessively focusing on another person. We're learning self-responsibility, instead of feeling excessively responsible for others. Self-care also means tending to our true responsibilities to others; we do this better when we're not feeling overly responsible.
Self-care sometimes means, me first, but usually, me too. It means we are responsible for ourselves and can choose to no longer be victims.
Self-care means learning to love the person we're responsible for taking care of - ourselves. We do not do this to hibernate in a cocoon of isolation and self indulgence; we do it so we can better love others, and learn to let them love us.
Self-care isn't selfish; it's self-esteem.
Today, God, help me love myself. Help me let go of feeling excessively responsible for those around me. Show me what I need to do to take care of myself and be appropriately responsible to others.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Taking Care of Ourselves
We often refer to recovery from codependency and adult child issues as self-care. Self-care is not, as some may think, a spin off of the Me generation. It isn't self-indulgence. It isn't selfishness - in the negative interpretation of that word.
We're learning to take care of ourselves, instead of obsessively focusing on another person. We're learning self-responsibility, instead of feeling excessively responsible for others. Self-care also means tending to our true responsibilities to others; we do this better when we're not feeling overly responsible.
Self-care sometimes means, me first, but usually, me too. It means we are responsible for ourselves and can choose to no longer be victims.
Self-care means learning to love the person we're responsible for taking care of - ourselves. We do not do this to hibernate in a cocoon of isolation and self indulgence; we do it so we can better love others, and learn to let them love us.
Self-care isn't selfish; it's self-esteem.
Today, God, help me love myself. Help me let go of feeling excessively responsible for those around me. Show me what I need to do to take care of myself and be appropriately responsible to others.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
It means we are responsible for ourselves and can choose to no longer be victims.
Hugs
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 328
... instead of obsessively focusing on another person ...
I was obsessed with my two alcoholic teenaged sons during their drinking escapades - but the obsession continued when they were in recovery and in fact got worse - how was the meeting, did you really go, who picked you up in the car - thinking their breath "smelled" funny or their eyes were red. I was just as goofy when they got sober as when they were drinking. I still thought I could control things.
Finally my Alanon sponsor got me to "get a life" - I went to meetings, made the coffee and set out the literature, called people between meetings, started walking for exercise, made gratitude lists, got involved in my community ... and a day at a time I got better. And my sons were very grateful for the change in me.
I like the hula hoop story: put a hula hoop around my waist and let it drop to the ground - anything outside the hoop is not my business.
Recovery is a journey, not a destination.
Jody
I was obsessed with my two alcoholic teenaged sons during their drinking escapades - but the obsession continued when they were in recovery and in fact got worse - how was the meeting, did you really go, who picked you up in the car - thinking their breath "smelled" funny or their eyes were red. I was just as goofy when they got sober as when they were drinking. I still thought I could control things.
Finally my Alanon sponsor got me to "get a life" - I went to meetings, made the coffee and set out the literature, called people between meetings, started walking for exercise, made gratitude lists, got involved in my community ... and a day at a time I got better. And my sons were very grateful for the change in me.
I like the hula hoop story: put a hula hoop around my waist and let it drop to the ground - anything outside the hoop is not my business.
Recovery is a journey, not a destination.
Jody
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