Here We Go Again...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Hope Land
Posts: 666
Here We Go Again...
Hi Everyone....
Just the sagga of the boys again....
I have the house up for sale and it not sitting so well with the boys...the younest mostly....just does not want to move....refuses to understand or try to understand...
So here we go...I get a Child Tax Credit cheque every month on the 20th, so I go the mailbox and grab the mail, off to the band and open up the Gov cheque and it is for more than I usually get...so I stood there and staired at it and pulled out the statement....it was my youngest income tax retrurn...not mine...so I put it all back together and then picked him up from work and handed to him and said I was sorry that I opened it and explained that I just thought it was the cheque that I get on this day. (my cheque was not in the mail) Well he flipped on me for opening up his mail...again I explained that I just have this cheque that cimes every month and I just did not even look....my cheque was not there, which was bothering me. Why was my cheque not there. What happened was, I missed the day before going to the mailbox and the mail was from a Wed and when I wwnt on the Thurs. I was to early and the mail had not been delivered. I went to the mailbox on the Sat. and there was my cheque.
So in the day I had a relestae person coming to see the house to I was cleaning up and went into my youngest son's bedroom and did a haul over...when he got hom his just flipped and told me to get in there and put it all back....ya put back the durty closes and stay the F out of his room...I said I will go inot anyroom in this house that I wabt.....that little brat spit in my face....so now I am mad....he has his fists going like he is going to take me down....his brother older brothe is in the bedroom next to him and he comes out, the youngest didn't see him and then the oldest drove him in the back of the head....sent him flying into his bedroom.....he said shut your mouth and don't you ever talk to mom like that....the youngest kept on yapping so the oldest gave him another punch in the face....ok, ok he said!
What I have been through and what my oldest has said and done to me....then he defends me!
Rose
Just the sagga of the boys again....
I have the house up for sale and it not sitting so well with the boys...the younest mostly....just does not want to move....refuses to understand or try to understand...
So here we go...I get a Child Tax Credit cheque every month on the 20th, so I go the mailbox and grab the mail, off to the band and open up the Gov cheque and it is for more than I usually get...so I stood there and staired at it and pulled out the statement....it was my youngest income tax retrurn...not mine...so I put it all back together and then picked him up from work and handed to him and said I was sorry that I opened it and explained that I just thought it was the cheque that I get on this day. (my cheque was not in the mail) Well he flipped on me for opening up his mail...again I explained that I just have this cheque that cimes every month and I just did not even look....my cheque was not there, which was bothering me. Why was my cheque not there. What happened was, I missed the day before going to the mailbox and the mail was from a Wed and when I wwnt on the Thurs. I was to early and the mail had not been delivered. I went to the mailbox on the Sat. and there was my cheque.
So in the day I had a relestae person coming to see the house to I was cleaning up and went into my youngest son's bedroom and did a haul over...when he got hom his just flipped and told me to get in there and put it all back....ya put back the durty closes and stay the F out of his room...I said I will go inot anyroom in this house that I wabt.....that little brat spit in my face....so now I am mad....he has his fists going like he is going to take me down....his brother older brothe is in the bedroom next to him and he comes out, the youngest didn't see him and then the oldest drove him in the back of the head....sent him flying into his bedroom.....he said shut your mouth and don't you ever talk to mom like that....the youngest kept on yapping so the oldest gave him another punch in the face....ok, ok he said!
What I have been through and what my oldest has said and done to me....then he defends me!
Rose
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
((((Rose)))
No great advice, just sending you hugs and prayers. My 14-year-old niece lives with us, when she's not staying at her best friend's house, and though I love her dearly, she is an angry, foul-mouthed child who gets her way with my stepmom.
I'm sure other moms will be along with some ES&H, but sorry you are going through this.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
No great advice, just sending you hugs and prayers. My 14-year-old niece lives with us, when she's not staying at her best friend's house, and though I love her dearly, she is an angry, foul-mouthed child who gets her way with my stepmom.
I'm sure other moms will be along with some ES&H, but sorry you are going through this.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Hope Land
Posts: 666
My plans to move...well I seem to see 2 bedroom places...I always have in mind a place for the boys to stay... 2 bedroom is not fit for 3...but we have to do what we have to do...they are not going to be with me for many more years. So, I like to camp and don't like to tent, I want to by a Rv Trailor...so if I buy a 2 bedroom place, why could not one of them stay in the trailor outside of the house.....Tv would be hooked up....Hold it....I think that I am going to take the tralior!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
I like the idea of the RV...I actually lived in one for a while. I had a place to live, but preferred to live in the RV by the lake..closest I could get to lakefront living!
Stay positive!
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Stay positive!
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Rose, you're not wrong, you are right to be doing what is right for you...and it sounds like whatever you do would never suit your son anyway...and you did well to maintain your composure when he was behaving so badly.
I hope your new move brings you new beginnings and peace.
Hugs
I hope your new move brings you new beginnings and peace.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: NJ
Posts: 702
Rose,
When I was selling my home that my kids did not want me to sell, they would do things that would make it less desirable to the buyer. Maybe he is afraid of losing all of his childhood.
I am glad your oldest stood up for you, I was surprised about that, it shows he is growing up.
You are doing the right thing for taking care of you, they will not stay with you forever ( at least lets hope not)
Good luck selling the home.
Hugs coming your way
When I was selling my home that my kids did not want me to sell, they would do things that would make it less desirable to the buyer. Maybe he is afraid of losing all of his childhood.
I am glad your oldest stood up for you, I was surprised about that, it shows he is growing up.
You are doing the right thing for taking care of you, they will not stay with you forever ( at least lets hope not)
Good luck selling the home.
Hugs coming your way
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Rose)))
Do what you need to do....kids only THINK they have to have all the luxuries to survive. My niece pitched a holy FIT when she lost the cell phone I'd bought her for Christmas (to replace a broken one) and dad wouldn't buy her a new one! She thinks cell phone, digital camera, MP3 player, and computer are necessities. How about a bed, bathroom, and food to eat? That's how I grew up!
Hugs and prayers!!
Amy
Do what you need to do....kids only THINK they have to have all the luxuries to survive. My niece pitched a holy FIT when she lost the cell phone I'd bought her for Christmas (to replace a broken one) and dad wouldn't buy her a new one! She thinks cell phone, digital camera, MP3 player, and computer are necessities. How about a bed, bathroom, and food to eat? That's how I grew up!
Hugs and prayers!!
Amy
Jujubee Queen
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Port Charlotte, Florida
Posts: 3,582
(((Rose)))
Sorry to hear about your youngest getting all arky barky on you. And I sure am surprised the oldest stepped in, good for him, maybe the youngest will think twice about being disrepectful to his mum next time?
Although I worry he will become nasty when the oldest isn't there to help you out. Maybe you need to up some kind of boundary for him? Or move him to the dogs house...LOL
I think whatever you choose to do will be the right thing. It is YOUR decision, and YOU know exactly what's the best for all concerned.
Hugs to you, Rose....
Sorry to hear about your youngest getting all arky barky on you. And I sure am surprised the oldest stepped in, good for him, maybe the youngest will think twice about being disrepectful to his mum next time?
Although I worry he will become nasty when the oldest isn't there to help you out. Maybe you need to up some kind of boundary for him? Or move him to the dogs house...LOL
I think whatever you choose to do will be the right thing. It is YOUR decision, and YOU know exactly what's the best for all concerned.
Hugs to you, Rose....
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
My cousin 2 surly badly behaved sons
. No one was addicted to anything.
When they were 13-14
the parents put a 2 bedroom trailer
on the back of their property.
They were expected to fix their own meals
with food provided by parents.
They kept the trailer like a pig sty
wore dirty clothes and quit acting like thugs.
Worked out well for all 4 of them.
Just thinking out loud Rose
. No one was addicted to anything.
When they were 13-14
the parents put a 2 bedroom trailer
on the back of their property.
They were expected to fix their own meals
with food provided by parents.
They kept the trailer like a pig sty
wore dirty clothes and quit acting like thugs.
Worked out well for all 4 of them.
Just thinking out loud Rose
StrivingToThrive
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: san diego, ca
Posts: 425
(((((ROSE)))))
As long as you remember to take care of yourself in all of this.
If its not possible with them in the house then a trailer is fine, if that becomes an issue then i like moose's "doghouse idea" !!!
HeeHee
so sorry, you have this issue, but you seem on top of it.:ghug3
Cathy:praying
As long as you remember to take care of yourself in all of this.
If its not possible with them in the house then a trailer is fine, if that becomes an issue then i like moose's "doghouse idea" !!!
HeeHee
so sorry, you have this issue, but you seem on top of it.:ghug3
Cathy:praying
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Hope Land
Posts: 666
Well since my oldest got this job in the mill I see huge changes with him...slowly but surely we are talking....he is around he more....even as tonight he said goodnight mom...I said oh goodnight son. He tells me where he is going and when he will be back...and he is back if not before. I guess there is no way of avoiding the teen years....I am sure we would have gone through the havoc even if my ex was not an addict. Just that I would have had some real support here and not the whole thing on my sholders. Where I don't know if I am handling things right. He is 19 next week, but I think we are on the upswing. things are starting to level out with him.
I know he smoked his share and more of pot, but there are no signs of him smoking it any more. He goes out to Tim Hortons's and gets a coffee and is back here with his coffee or down to the corner stroe to grab an icecream. We had a bunch for dinner last weekend, my girlfriend had her boys come, they had some beer tried to get him to drink he opened one but just had a sip , he told them that he does not drink...I went and made him a glass of ice tea. I was so proud of him for coming right out and saying I don't drink.
I guess I just have to bide time with the youngest and he is coming into the nasty teen years. Would have just been easier with a dad here that could have taken on some of the brunt.
Rose
I know he smoked his share and more of pot, but there are no signs of him smoking it any more. He goes out to Tim Hortons's and gets a coffee and is back here with his coffee or down to the corner stroe to grab an icecream. We had a bunch for dinner last weekend, my girlfriend had her boys come, they had some beer tried to get him to drink he opened one but just had a sip , he told them that he does not drink...I went and made him a glass of ice tea. I was so proud of him for coming right out and saying I don't drink.
I guess I just have to bide time with the youngest and he is coming into the nasty teen years. Would have just been easier with a dad here that could have taken on some of the brunt.
Rose
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