frstnm

Apparently, I cannot pick them either. I had met someone who is in the program over the summer and we had kept in touch. We sent email and finally got to a couple of phone calls. I had been sure to say that communication for me is absolutely key. This person had repeatedly not called when she said she absolutley would and I should have known if was not going well. We did finally talk several days in a row and we had already discussed getting together in the city. We seemed to have so much in common. The day before we were supposed to get together she sent an email saying she had been in bed all day w a sinus infection no call. (that she has had for 2 weeks- could have mentioned it ?????) Promises to call on saturday anyway whether she was feeling better or not. No call all weekend. I have reached the point of frustration with the lack of communication, being simply blown off. Im not perfect but I firmly believe that a phone call is not that hard to make and that I deserve better. I didnt have to drink over it but it sure crossed my mind. I have been really bummed out and isolating all weekend. I guess Im just not ready and this isnt one I want or need to deal with. It sucks being single. Maybe Im just too sensitive ?

Fortunately, I havent heard from this person in three days.

:codiepolice

gypsytears

Sorry I can't say I understand your situation Scott... but I do send out some support to you. You've grown a lot since I've started reading your posts and you are a great person. When the time is right & the right person comes along you won't be sober and single anymore .

*Nothing wrong with being sensitive btw.

mle-sober

Frstnm -
This is my two cents & only that. For what it's worth. But I'm a female and my guess is, as they say, she's just not that into you.

So the quickest way to relieve the problem is to accept it and move on. If she calls or emails or otherwise wants to make contact, I'd be blunt and say, "Nah, I thought back in (whatever month) that we kind of had a chance but now I feel sort of flung around by you, so I think I'll pass on making plans."

If she protests and wants reasons, just decline and get off the phone or don't return emails. She's not worth your time and you'll find someone else along the way who is. I firmly believe that we frequently (including me, of course, before I was married) get attached way too early on ideas of who we think that person is. And when they show signs of being other than what we hoped for, we feel duped.

But the truth is, we just made the mistake of thinking they were someone they weren't. I know that hurts sometimes. But the good news is you didn't marry her and have babies with her! ( : Hang in there and for God's sake don't let this one unworthy woman make you drink!

reed

I can understand your frustrations. It really bothers me when people do not have the common courtesy to call. Being single is a bummer sometimes but it does also have its advantages. When the right person comes along, you will know it, just keep looking and waiting.

Dee74

I'm not sure I understand either...
if you think you're being used, walk away.
Based on this post, it sounds as if you and she just aren't sympatico to me.

On the other hand, if you're not sure, and if you like this girl, then you have to take her various reasons at face value - but whatever you decide - share your frustrations with her.
Nothing good ever came of not talking.

and First - no-one, and I mean no-one, is worth drinking over. Ever.

Period.
D