Chino

I said the Serenity Prayer just before surfing here. Then I saw a thread by the same name. I'll probably be saying it a lot more than usual.

My recovering AD is hanging out again with her former BF who is also recovering. Every time she does this she allows herself to get sidetracked from her priorities. Her therapist flat out told her she has an addiction to him. She swears they can beat the odds that no one else has. He's the one who introduced her to dilaudid.

While I'm not worried about her using again (not right now, that is) I'm worried about her safety. When both of them were deep in the addiction, he physically abused her several times. She thinks it was just the drugs, but the rest of us have told her it's a part of his character.

So today I'm praying for my serenity, hers too, and for her safety. I'll even pray for him and try not to break something while I'm doing it.

Impurrfect

(((Chino)))

Hugs and prayers coming to you and your daughter.

Amy

cece1960

Sending prayers...

cece

Prayers for all involved.
Prayers for you in you quest to give this up to her HP.
and prayers for your serenity.
Cathy

rahsue

I hope she sees him for what he is sooner than later.

hugs and prayers

hope213

read cats post today titled"serenity prayer". it is really good & i think it can help you. i will say a prayer for you & your daughter. remember there is nothing you can do. she is in charge of her choices even if we do not like them. hugs,

marle

Sending prayers. My AD is with a much older man who is abusive too but they are still using. Hugs, Marle

Chino

Thank you all so much. I'm feeling peaceful now and I know it's from prayers -- yours and mine.

A while back I had read that Tibetan monks do a compassion meditation and they even use it for their persecutors. When they were hooked up to EEG's during the meditation, the area of the brain that regulates joy was active.

I think I just experienced that same thing or something close to it.

I prayed for my daughter and myself, then I focused on the BF. I told God we both knew I didn't want to pray for him, so I reflected instead on what I would want for all addicts.

I said I wanted them to overcome their addictions and use what they had learned and experienced to make themselves better people. I wanted them to become productive citizens and to be happy, to have a life and enjoy it.

I realized the BF could be anyone's son here and yet I would pray for them. We probably don't know a fraction of the ugliness that has occurred in our addicts lives, and no telling what all my own daughter has done.

If I would want forgiveness and compassion for her, I have to be willing to give it in return.

I don't know how to explain what I just experienced. It felt so good and so right that it hurt in such a beautiful way.

Thank you for helping me open my heart a little more.

BUTTERFLY-7

:codiepolicethis is all we can do 4'r now&,LET GO AND LET GODfight ur's and her battle.

greeteachday

((((Chino))))
Beautiful thoughts you shared here about how you were able to find some of that compassion...just beautiful. Thank you. I will keep your daughter, the bf and you in my prayers too.

lil516

Your thoughts on compassion moved me to tears...

I was about to post a reply to your original words saying that despite how you felt the BF was probably the one who most needed prayers and then I saw your next post....

you have discovered "amazing grace"...
I will add my prayers to yours

I pray that your daughter's recovery stays strong and that BF finds the love and strength to overcome his demons

It is so true that he could be any one of our sons...
I pray for each addict as tho they were mine