orviske

Made it back safely from my business trip. Slept peacefully in my own bed lastnight with the comfort of my SO beside me. Well, I guess I can't exactly say peacefully. I was at peace to be home, but awoke several times in the night to use the ladies room, or waking up from VERY vivid and disturbing dreams. I had forgotten what it was like to have dreams (and actually remember bits and pieces of them!)

I remember being small, I would have these terrible nightmares and as a teenager I would relish in them. I had a dream journal and a book on how to interpret dreams. I started smoking pot when I was about 18, but only once in a great while. After I received my Bachelor's degree, I started smoking and drinking more heavily, most likely due to the fact that I finally felt free after years of working putting myself through college and not really having the typical college experience. That's where it began, then I realized it supressed my inner turmoil. For years I have been cramming all this emotional crap in the jar that is me. It eliminated my dreams, and allowed me to "check out" from all of the events in my life that made me sad, angry, or upset.

I think my soul has had enough. Most recently I have had deep emotional distress including crying incontrollably. The jar is full, and will burst if I don't take care of it now. I realize now the drugs and alcohol were only masking my issues. Its easy to believe they aren't there after years of abuse.


"Forget the times of your distress, but never forget what they taught you." - Herbert Gasser

"Try to relax and enjoy the crisis." - Ashleigh Brilliant


"Never fear shadows
They simply mean
There is a light
Shinning somewhere nearby..."
- Author Unknown

tesquizito

I too started drinking really heavily once I finally finished my College degree and took my first job offer. I was like, "yeah, I made it, now I'm entitled to drink whenever I want without consequence". That was 10 years ago for me and I'm definitely seeing the consequence.

pi2

I too had bad dreams and recently came back from a business trip. It has been almost 2 weeks since my last drink and I am feeling better every day. It is a pleasure aking up in the morning knowing what I did and where I was the night before.

Aysha

I am really in to Sylvia Browne the psychic. I have her dreams book. She says dreams are our way of releasing built up suppressed emotions and thoughts. And that no matter how unpleasnat they are. It is vital that we have them for they release all the negative subconscious thoughts and feellings that we are unable to consciously. I dont know how true it is. But she calls them release dreams.
So true to what you said there may be underlying things at work here.
But I am no expert.
I love dreams. I have intense ones all the time. It is like a vacation everynight to me. Even the bad. As bad as they make me feel when I wake up. After I snap out of the sleepy state. And think about them. It is fasinating to me.
These dreams will pass. As does alot of things.
Great job on 6 days!!

1963comet

I was told years ago that dreams are just getting rid of the junk in your head. And when you go to bed drunk you cannot dream. A person needs to dream to clear out the crap. So maybe you can see it as a release. I did.

And I was hit hard with emotions when I stopped drinking. It was like everything that happened to me, hit me all at once. Today I can deal with life as it happeneds instead of covering issues up with booze.

I went to couseling because I was overwelmed. It did get better.