AD walked out again
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Hackettstown, NJ
Posts: 692
AD walked out again
Turns out she lasted in detox #5, on Wednesday, about 3 hours, and spent the next four days on the street with "some guy". Some BS about being locked in a room and not allowed out for a cigarette when she was in there for 3 hours. So she chose death from AIDS, instead.
Her BF is getting sick of her, too.
I am deep in grief in despair and really don't know what to do. I am barely hangin on. I don't want to watch her die, and I don't want to imagine her dying without being there. The only thing that will save her life is getting clean, and she is incapable of even finishing detox.
Also, she has none of her HIV meds now. No wonder the clinic doesn't like to give the meds to using addicts.
supposedly, she is"making more phone calls". but she also lied to BF that she already spoke to me when she didn't. Even if she is 'making more phone calls' - what's the point? The first thing that gets the tiniest bit uncomfortable in each and every detox sends her packing. Why bother making the phone calls for the next place?
Anyone know anything about "locked" drug treatment in other countries?
I am also considering having BF have her arrested (he is considering this too) so she can detox in jail.
If it wasn't for the exploding viral load and certain death, I would be more OK with "let her hit her bottom" but I am already greiving her death.
Her BF is getting sick of her, too.
I am deep in grief in despair and really don't know what to do. I am barely hangin on. I don't want to watch her die, and I don't want to imagine her dying without being there. The only thing that will save her life is getting clean, and she is incapable of even finishing detox.
Also, she has none of her HIV meds now. No wonder the clinic doesn't like to give the meds to using addicts.
supposedly, she is"making more phone calls". but she also lied to BF that she already spoke to me when she didn't. Even if she is 'making more phone calls' - what's the point? The first thing that gets the tiniest bit uncomfortable in each and every detox sends her packing. Why bother making the phone calls for the next place?
Anyone know anything about "locked" drug treatment in other countries?
I am also considering having BF have her arrested (he is considering this too) so she can detox in jail.
If it wasn't for the exploding viral load and certain death, I would be more OK with "let her hit her bottom" but I am already greiving her death.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Sleepy)))
I'm so sorry that she walked out again.
I can understand why you want her to be locked up but even that isn't so easy all the time. With the jails being overcrowded, they usually won't keep you long unless it's a major crime or violation of probation, if they even arrest her.
I hope she finds it in herself to seak treatment and stay with it. In the meantime, I'm sending you both lots of hugs and prayers!
Amy
I'm so sorry that she walked out again.
I can understand why you want her to be locked up but even that isn't so easy all the time. With the jails being overcrowded, they usually won't keep you long unless it's a major crime or violation of probation, if they even arrest her.
I hope she finds it in herself to seak treatment and stay with it. In the meantime, I'm sending you both lots of hugs and prayers!
Amy
Leap of Faith Survivor
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,555
Oh Sleepy, I am so, so sorry...:ghug3....Huge Momma prayers for you and Leah...She is not ready yet...and my heart breaks for you....feeling so powerless to save this kid...You know the drill....just wish you didn't have to go through this...please try and remember that although you are powerless her HP is not and there is a bigger plan afoot....I don't know much about locked facilities....but glad bf is a support to you...please pm if you'd like....:ghug3....Grateful
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Hardy Ky
Posts: 170
I am so sorry to hear that! I think that is the hardest thing to do is watch them destroy theirselves...But believe me...Prayers are going out your way....I will be praying hard for all of you.:ghug3
Lots of hugs and prayers sent your way,
Machele:praying
Lots of hugs and prayers sent your way,
Machele:praying
Jujubee Queen
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Port Charlotte, Florida
Posts: 3,582
((sleepygoat)))
Hugs to you, I know how frustrating it is to want your daughter to get help, and recovery, only she won't follow through with want YOU want.
I have been there many times dealing with my oldest son. I wanted him sober and happy, like all us parents want to see our kids, but for some reason, he just couldn't hold on to recovery.
Then I began Step one and realized I am powerless.
Now, I have accepted that if my son does not stay on the recovery road, (today, he says he is sober) that the only future for him is jail, or death.
Meetings, Sleepy run to meetings, they help more than words can say.
Hugs,
Hugs to you, I know how frustrating it is to want your daughter to get help, and recovery, only she won't follow through with want YOU want.
I have been there many times dealing with my oldest son. I wanted him sober and happy, like all us parents want to see our kids, but for some reason, he just couldn't hold on to recovery.
Then I began Step one and realized I am powerless.
Now, I have accepted that if my son does not stay on the recovery road, (today, he says he is sober) that the only future for him is jail, or death.
Meetings, Sleepy run to meetings, they help more than words can say.
Hugs,
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
Posts: 4,482
Originally Posted by sleepygoat 
Anyone know anything about "locked" drug treatment in other countries?
... but I am already greiving her death.
... but I am already greiving her death.
I wish I had something to say to alleviate your grief and I'm sorry that I don't. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Sleepy, my heart and prayers go out to you, this is just so sad.
Like Moose said, grab yourself some meetings because they can save your life, I know they saved mine.
Lots of prayers going out for your daughter too, she's in God's hands.
Hugs
Like Moose said, grab yourself some meetings because they can save your life, I know they saved mine.
Lots of prayers going out for your daughter too, she's in God's hands.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,322
Sleepy,
I'm just so darn sorry about how things have been going. Tomorrow is a new day, sister, and hopefully you will find something of joy and beauty to take your thoughts away from all this for a while. Take good care of yourself these next few days; do a little self-mothering, okay?
I'm just so darn sorry about how things have been going. Tomorrow is a new day, sister, and hopefully you will find something of joy and beauty to take your thoughts away from all this for a while. Take good care of yourself these next few days; do a little self-mothering, okay?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
Originally Posted by sleepygoat
Anyone know anything about "locked" drug treatment in other countries?
My heart just aches for you in this situation. If you have the resources and/or insurance, consider locating a therapst in your area who does EMDR therapy. It's has a great track record at helping trauma victims and no doubt about it, this is a real live trauma for you. Here's a link:
EMDR Institute, Inc.
Southern through and through
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In.....trouble :-)
Posts: 1,453
(((((((((sleepygoat)))))))))))))
I am so sorry you and your daughter are going through this. I'm praying for ya'll daily, asking God to get her to the "submission" stage...just giving it up to her HP.
And special prayers for you, sleepy. I can't imagine anything tougher for a mom.
Hugs,
Hangin' In
I am so sorry you and your daughter are going through this. I'm praying for ya'll daily, asking God to get her to the "submission" stage...just giving it up to her HP.
And special prayers for you, sleepy. I can't imagine anything tougher for a mom.
Hugs,
Hangin' In
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Hackettstown, NJ
Posts: 692
Thanks everyone for the prayers. I still believe that prayer is very powerful. Please do keep praying.
I am still unsure weather to go back on psych meds (its been years) and numb it out, take a leave of absense and do what feels good for me (who will pay my bills?), or keep slogging through my everyday life on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
I have really good friends in the 'real world' and much support here, too. I am grateful for that.
I am still unsure weather to go back on psych meds (its been years) and numb it out, take a leave of absense and do what feels good for me (who will pay my bills?), or keep slogging through my everyday life on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
I have really good friends in the 'real world' and much support here, too. I am grateful for that.
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