Al-anon , first meeting
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: N. California
Posts: 50
Al-anon , first meeting
I went to my first meeting last night but some things were a little vague. For example, the books, I wanted to take one last night but is there a charge for them?? $$$ , How much should I take to put in the can???, Is it acceptable to leave early since I have kids to pick up in soccer practice or is that extremely rude?? Thanks for all the help you can offer a newbie. Overall a good meeting, nice group of 15 people or so, I plan on going to 6 meetings before I decide if it is my thing. I think it will be.
Retired Pro Drunk
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Saint Paul, MN
Posts: 901
Every meeting has its own dynamics. This is based on my experience at both al-anon and AA meetings.
Groups charge for books, but many offer "liberal credit terms" for those in need. Ask the Trusted Servant (person who led the meeting) or the person who is in charge of the meeting donations about costs and if they will cut you a break if you need.
Some meetings I've attended have a suggested donation of $2. But it's always "give what you can." IMO, $2 is plenty if you can afford it. Sometimes I just grab whatever change is in my pocket when I'm short. And when I'm broke, I'm broke. I tend to kick in a little extra if I'm drinking coffee, but that's just me.
If it wasn't explained during the meeting, feel free to ask where the $ goes if interested. Not only is there coffee and whatnot to pay for, there is often rent for the space, and contributions to the local intergroup or general service office.
I've never been to a meeting where anyone objected to someone arriving late or leaving early. Better you're there for part of the meeting than not at all.
Going to 6 before deciding to continue is a fabulous idea! And all groups are not the same. If other groups are available and fit into your schedule, try different ones.
Any questions about specific meeting items can usually be directed at the Trusted Servant. If they don't know the answer, they should be able to point you to someone who does. And as always, ask anyone. Helping the newcomer is good for both sides.
Groups charge for books, but many offer "liberal credit terms" for those in need. Ask the Trusted Servant (person who led the meeting) or the person who is in charge of the meeting donations about costs and if they will cut you a break if you need.
Some meetings I've attended have a suggested donation of $2. But it's always "give what you can." IMO, $2 is plenty if you can afford it. Sometimes I just grab whatever change is in my pocket when I'm short. And when I'm broke, I'm broke. I tend to kick in a little extra if I'm drinking coffee, but that's just me.
If it wasn't explained during the meeting, feel free to ask where the $ goes if interested. Not only is there coffee and whatnot to pay for, there is often rent for the space, and contributions to the local intergroup or general service office.
I've never been to a meeting where anyone objected to someone arriving late or leaving early. Better you're there for part of the meeting than not at all.
Going to 6 before deciding to continue is a fabulous idea! And all groups are not the same. If other groups are available and fit into your schedule, try different ones.
Any questions about specific meeting items can usually be directed at the Trusted Servant. If they don't know the answer, they should be able to point you to someone who does. And as always, ask anyone. Helping the newcomer is good for both sides.
Southern through and through
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In.....trouble :-)
Posts: 1,453
Keep going back. The six times things is a good rule. One just can't get a feel for recovery until you give it a good shot.
Re the books, we write the price in the front of our books, but I've told many a newcomer to take a book if they don't happen to have the money right then. I'll make up the difference if they happen to not come back. I feel just getting that ODAT book in their hand is a help.
And getting to the meeting is the important part. If you have to leave early, then get as much recovery as you can before you duck out. No one gets penalized for leaving early.
And at our meetings, folks put a dollar in the pot.
If you have questions re the meetings, just find the person you feel the most comfortable with and ask after the meeting. I'm sure there are folks there who would love to share with you their recovery and anything else you want to know about the meetings.
Hugs and prayers for YOUR continued recovery,
Hangin' In
Re the books, we write the price in the front of our books, but I've told many a newcomer to take a book if they don't happen to have the money right then. I'll make up the difference if they happen to not come back. I feel just getting that ODAT book in their hand is a help.
And getting to the meeting is the important part. If you have to leave early, then get as much recovery as you can before you duck out. No one gets penalized for leaving early.
And at our meetings, folks put a dollar in the pot.
If you have questions re the meetings, just find the person you feel the most comfortable with and ask after the meeting. I'm sure there are folks there who would love to share with you their recovery and anything else you want to know about the meetings.
Hugs and prayers for YOUR continued recovery,
Hangin' In
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: phoenix arizona
Posts: 741
At our meetings, the newcomer's first meeting is on us. First time members don't pay.
I put in $1 each week, but it's not required. You give what you can, when you can.
There's no fee for membership.
I've ordered some of the literature online and some of the Courage to Change books were at my meeting. The price was inside the front cover. Here we also have a recovery bookstore.
Congrats on going to your first meeting!! Hope you keep coming back!
I put in $1 each week, but it's not required. You give what you can, when you can.
There's no fee for membership.
I've ordered some of the literature online and some of the Courage to Change books were at my meeting. The price was inside the front cover. Here we also have a recovery bookstore.
Congrats on going to your first meeting!! Hope you keep coming back!
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