Fentanyl Intermission
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 3
Fentanyl Intermission
"Down in a hole and I don't know if I can be saved,
See my heart, they decorate it like a grave..."
Oh, God, I've left messages but it seems you've been out. Now the drugs have taken over and I can't tell who I am. Stomache hurts, body aches, and I can't see clearly. If I were alone I'm sure I would be speaking to you in person by now...
For the past 3 years I have been on strong narcotics perscribed by doctors. After my back surgery a year ago I was introduced to Fentanyl...that was the worst day of my life! A year later (maybe more) I got up the courage to go into my doctor and beg him to never perscribe this drug to me again. Crying uncontrollably in his office I think he got the message.
I have a family that I have put through hell by being on this drug and I knew a long time ago I needed to get off. My wife is incredibly hurt (I broke the news to her today) and is talking about me moving out. I miss today, I miss the past. My wife has watched me go from a great man to literally evaporating before her very eyes. Now just a shell of the man I once was.
I am 4 days off the patch now and in major pain. Haven't eaten in 4 days and it takes all the energy I have to try to accomplish the smallest of activities. It's been said, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". We shall see...
See my heart, they decorate it like a grave..."
Oh, God, I've left messages but it seems you've been out. Now the drugs have taken over and I can't tell who I am. Stomache hurts, body aches, and I can't see clearly. If I were alone I'm sure I would be speaking to you in person by now...
For the past 3 years I have been on strong narcotics perscribed by doctors. After my back surgery a year ago I was introduced to Fentanyl...that was the worst day of my life! A year later (maybe more) I got up the courage to go into my doctor and beg him to never perscribe this drug to me again. Crying uncontrollably in his office I think he got the message.
I have a family that I have put through hell by being on this drug and I knew a long time ago I needed to get off. My wife is incredibly hurt (I broke the news to her today) and is talking about me moving out. I miss today, I miss the past. My wife has watched me go from a great man to literally evaporating before her very eyes. Now just a shell of the man I once was.
I am 4 days off the patch now and in major pain. Haven't eaten in 4 days and it takes all the energy I have to try to accomplish the smallest of activities. It's been said, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". We shall see...
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
I am sorry you are having such a bad time
We do have a Sustance Abuse Forum
that perhaps has ssimilar experiences posted.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/substance-abuse/
Blessings to you and your family
Welcome to SR....
We do have a Sustance Abuse Forum
that perhaps has ssimilar experiences posted.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/substance-abuse/
Blessings to you and your family
Welcome to SR....
smileyologist and lord of bees
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: mourning smileys near you
Posts: 2,508
Glad you made it to the forum, welcome to SR...
The great man probably hasn't evaporated - even though it might seem that way - he's just very busy with all the other stuff that's going on just now which occupies all his time and energy...
One thing you'll find on this forum is good advice if you read through the threads, some people have come through some really bad times - though I know it's tough when you're in the process of living your bad time at the moment...
Believe it or not, coming to this forum is a step forward and you'll get loads of encouragement and support from all of us here...
Has your doctor recommended a safe way to get off this stuff? Are you being treated for withdrawal? How are you managing your pain now you are off Fentanyl? Does your doc know you're not eating?
Keep us posted bro, let us know how things are...
The great man probably hasn't evaporated - even though it might seem that way - he's just very busy with all the other stuff that's going on just now which occupies all his time and energy...
One thing you'll find on this forum is good advice if you read through the threads, some people have come through some really bad times - though I know it's tough when you're in the process of living your bad time at the moment...
Believe it or not, coming to this forum is a step forward and you'll get loads of encouragement and support from all of us here...
Has your doctor recommended a safe way to get off this stuff? Are you being treated for withdrawal? How are you managing your pain now you are off Fentanyl? Does your doc know you're not eating?
Keep us posted bro, let us know how things are...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 3
Unfortunately I'm not doing well...I took a bunch of pills last night in a hotel room and drank a lot to try to say goodbye. Instead I ended up in the hospital and now home. The main problem I'm having is the mental depression. Dark...very dark. Thanks to all that took the time to listen.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Please contact your doctor
and be honest about your situation.
In my opinion ...you need professional assistance.
and stay the hell outta hotels.
Please consider your family before yourself.
and be honest about your situation.
In my opinion ...you need professional assistance.
and stay the hell outta hotels.Please consider your family before yourself.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: 49 degrees north
Posts: 1,036
First things first, I think. Eat, sleep, get help. You really need medical help. Get it any way you can. The hospital is your friend right now.
Then, come back and we'll talk.
Get help now!
warrens
Then, come back and we'll talk.
Get help now!
warrens
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Here are some resources for you to use...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-suicidal.html
At least ...read those links.
Prayers for you and your family coming your way
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-suicidal.html
At least ...read those links.
Prayers for you and your family coming your way
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Cumming, Ga
Posts: 665
Having a body that won't die and a mind that doesn't work is a hopeless place. However, this may just be the motivation to seek help. Some type of detox whether it be a treatment center or hospital would at least give you a start. Kicking narcotics is a painful experience. It is also the safest detox. While it may feel like your gonna die, it is not near as dangerous as detoxing from alcohol or benzodiazepines. But withdrawl from narcotics really needs some supervision. The biggest reason is what you've just experienced....get a couple of days away from the patch and the pains from withdrawl are so great that you have to use something. Detox will get you past that.
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