back and trying...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,361
back and trying...
Here I am again...
The last few weeks were one big blur...Today i'm trying to stay sober...
wauw what a mess...
Still I am at work now and able to function so that's a plus...
The last few weeks were one big blur...Today i'm trying to stay sober...
wauw what a mess...
Still I am at work now and able to function so that's a plus...
....coming_cleanMember
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Michigan -- Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Posts: 325
Coming Clean -- glad to see you're back...
Today is all you have to get through. Then you can make a new decision tomorrow, but for today, you've already MADE that decision --
GOOD FOR YOU!!!
Awesome... I'm so glad you're here.
HuGGGGGGGGGs
~C
Today is all you have to get through. Then you can make a new decision tomorrow, but for today, you've already MADE that decision --
GOOD FOR YOU!!!
Awesome... I'm so glad you're here.
HuGGGGGGGGGs
~C
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,361
it's starting to become normal for me to type that i relapsed again....I relapse almost every day, sometimes even more...however yesterday evening i had a victory as well. I wanted to go out to buy some more, but i didn't do it. Making a list of all karmic consequences for giving up or staying strong helped me a lot to get my mind right. Even tough stress and anxiety were racing through my body. I stayed in, went to bed at a decent time, so today I actually don't feel like a zombie today, but kinda fresh.
today is a new day, i'm sober so that;s good , and i'm a bit more prepared and aware about my addiction. I only drank one cup of coffee today, just for the cafaine withdrawls. My stomach is much more relaxed now it's wunderfull.
95% of all my relapses start with this stressy 'knot' feeling in my stomach. Yesterday it started around this time (2:30 pm) and I relapsed one hour later. But not today. In order to stay clean I have to give up coffee and energy drinks, so I can actually 'ride' the anxiety, it all becomes manageble.
I find it still difficult to focus for a long time, and be productive at work, but that will become better if I manage to get more sobertime. First things first. I drink herbal relaxing teas, and i'm about to start on my third piece of fruit. I have some musli bars with me as well, and some cup-a-soups for salt and minerals. This morning I took some multivatimines and some echinacea to boost my system even more. I can't think of more healthy stuff to do haha.
it is a sunny day outside. And altough i've been on day one for almost four years now, this is a good day..
JFT...
today is a new day, i'm sober so that;s good , and i'm a bit more prepared and aware about my addiction. I only drank one cup of coffee today, just for the cafaine withdrawls. My stomach is much more relaxed now it's wunderfull.
95% of all my relapses start with this stressy 'knot' feeling in my stomach. Yesterday it started around this time (2:30 pm) and I relapsed one hour later. But not today. In order to stay clean I have to give up coffee and energy drinks, so I can actually 'ride' the anxiety, it all becomes manageble.
I find it still difficult to focus for a long time, and be productive at work, but that will become better if I manage to get more sobertime. First things first. I drink herbal relaxing teas, and i'm about to start on my third piece of fruit. I have some musli bars with me as well, and some cup-a-soups for salt and minerals. This morning I took some multivatimines and some echinacea to boost my system even more. I can't think of more healthy stuff to do haha.
it is a sunny day outside. And altough i've been on day one for almost four years now, this is a good day..
JFT...
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