Here is better than there
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Littleton, Co.
Posts: 3,317
Here is better than there
Hi guys, day 3 for me and this morning I was singing and dancing while I was getting ready for work, really in a great mood. It wasn't long after I got to work that everyone was on my nerves. I am generally easy going and not one to let others make me have to leave the room befor saying something I will regret. I am asuming my mood had something to do with not drinking. After work I came home and it was either go take a drink off my hidden bottle (I just cant make myself dump it out yet), or get on SR and vent, so that is what I am doing.
My mood isnt so bad now, but I am very shakey to the point that typing is difficult. I have been drinking every day for quite sometime atleast 2 but usually atleast 4,5,6,7... I also take pain meds which I know I shouldnt be drinking with. SO whay do I do it??? I am a logical rational trustworthy (other than around alcohol) person.
I try and kid myself that my kids, family and close friends dont know what is going on with me but I'm sure they do, how would they not.
Anyway I had to vent because I know alot of you care, it is easy to see that
.
THANK YOU ALL.....
Toomutch
My mood isnt so bad now, but I am very shakey to the point that typing is difficult. I have been drinking every day for quite sometime atleast 2 but usually atleast 4,5,6,7... I also take pain meds which I know I shouldnt be drinking with. SO whay do I do it??? I am a logical rational trustworthy (other than around alcohol) person.
I try and kid myself that my kids, family and close friends dont know what is going on with me but I'm sure they do, how would they not.
Anyway I had to vent because I know alot of you care, it is easy to see that
. THANK YOU ALL.....
Toomutch
God is my benzo
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Charlotte, nc
Posts: 198
sorry you had a tough day. one of the harder lessons you'll learn in recovery is that life doesn't get any easier, you just get better at handling it. try praying, I thought it was silly when I was new, but then you see it working.
I really just wanted to point out if you keep that bottle around, you will drink it. Sometimes you need someone to call you out and that's what I'm doing. If your serious about your recovery, dump it. it's not like it's the last bottle on earth, another bottle is just a trip to the store away. if you hang on to that bottle, you haven't let go. call it symbolic or whatever, if you want to quit, start with that bottle.
are you going to aa?
I really just wanted to point out if you keep that bottle around, you will drink it. Sometimes you need someone to call you out and that's what I'm doing. If your serious about your recovery, dump it. it's not like it's the last bottle on earth, another bottle is just a trip to the store away. if you hang on to that bottle, you haven't let go. call it symbolic or whatever, if you want to quit, start with that bottle.
are you going to aa?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,465
Hi,
Ups and downs are part of the game during early recovery. But, you're doing great. I couldn't keep alcohol in the house then, and in fact, still never do. It's just easier that way.
I believed that, because I drank at home, alone, no one knew, except my family. After I stopped drinking, I realized that a lot of people knew or at least, suspected what was going on. It's part of the denial of the disease.
Ups and downs are part of the game during early recovery. But, you're doing great. I couldn't keep alcohol in the house then, and in fact, still never do. It's just easier that way.
I believed that, because I drank at home, alone, no one knew, except my family. After I stopped drinking, I realized that a lot of people knew or at least, suspected what was going on. It's part of the denial of the disease.
Spiritual Being
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Louisville
Posts: 138
Toomutch, first let me say that it is totally tubular (haven't used that word since the 80's) that you have conquered day 3. If you were dancing and happy this morning just wait for the morning of day 4. YOUR HEAD WILL EXPLODE WITH JOY!! 
Now about that hidden bottle of yours. I was looking at my own "little bottle" on day 7 and do you know what? I bet you can't guess?
Give up?
I TOOK IT!
Alas, I am now back at day 2 and I must say that I doubt day 3 will be as exciting the second time around.
Now about that hidden bottle of yours. I was looking at my own "little bottle" on day 7 and do you know what? I bet you can't guess?
Give up?
I TOOK IT!
Alas, I am now back at day 2 and I must say that I doubt day 3 will be as exciting the second time around.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Littleton, Co.
Posts: 3,317
Space, I cannot wait for tomorrow morning now that I know my head will explode with joy, that's far out.:bounce
29a, thanks for bustin my chops, keeping a bottle I know is asking for trouble, I am getting closer to dumping it.
29a, thanks for bustin my chops, keeping a bottle I know is asking for trouble, I am getting closer to dumping it.
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