peaceteach

I have never been to an Al-anon meeting. I was just wondering if those of you who are active in Al-Anon or Nar-anon or Coda notice a difference when you compare meetings to this forum. Do you get more from saying the words outloud than merely typing here at SR? Do you FEEL it (mind, body and soul) more strongly by vocalizing and giving voice to your words?

best

Wrap your arms around yourself. *HUG*

Now picture what it will feel like if I do the same in person. *HUG*

Face to face adds so much more.

DESIGNER

I tried alanon and I believe that the meeting that I went to was kind of a dud. i have heard stories of great alanon meetings and how awesome they were and have tried to find a really good meeting time that fits my schedule but have had no luck. They say that each meeting is ran differently and I hope to find one that I like.

I think that I get more out of something if I hear personal experiences from others and realize that I am not alone. The meeting that I went to you were asked not to share your stories.....they only wanted to focus on yourself....which is good and all and the point of alanon but at that time I just needed to share my experience and make sure that I was not the only one going through hell.

This meeting is before I found SR and I feel that this site has helped me sooo much.

Growing

Designer...I hope you will keep checking out meetings because that one DOES sound like a dud. I didn't know meetings could go this bad sometimes....I am so sorry.

SR is good in its own way and its the same with ftf meetings. I have found that people are more detailed and honest, in some respects, here at SR because you never even have to SEE eachother.

Alanon ftf meetings are different because, IMHO, people are more motivated to be kind and compassionate because you are actually looking at the person in question. It is easier in ftf meetings to SEE that people care...even people who may not even speak to you...you can see the understanding in their eyes. Plus...you get to talk to each other before and after the meetings. Alanon is a great place to make friends...where you go out for coffee or whatever...ect.

Alanon and acoa meetings fill a void for me that can't be filled any other way...because...as an acoa I find it difficult at times to mingle with the rest of society freely and unselfconsciously...alanon and acoa meetings give me a healthy outlet for friendly connections.

Plus...you just can't beat getting those hugs! They made me uncomfortable at first...I never really was a "huggy" type of person....but I learned to trust...and I learned to support people...and now these healthy situations feel more comfortable to me now...I will never forget the first time someone asked me for a hug....a whole new world for me. I hope that doesn't sound too weird.

But with SR...IMHO, I have found a certain "caliber" of people that I don't see in ftf meetings so often....there are actual many, many "Recovery Super-Stars" here at SR. That makes SR very special.

aztchr

I really like my Nar-anon meeting and usually share keeping newcomers in mind.
I do like reading here, though because I can go back and re-read the posts.
I enjoy both formats. Try a few different meetings and see what works for you.
Great question for discussion.

MsPINKAcres

my recovery has benefited from both.

Each one provides a part of my recovery in different ways - I have sponsees at both places and it is amazing how someone I've never actually met f2f can be experiencing some of the same things I am experiencing and this person lives hundreds of miles accross the nation.

Then the interaction that I have when working with my local sponsees - having the awesome privilege to watch their growth in meetings, their ability to share with newcomers, to see someone who in the beginning didn't trust, didn't have a HP, tell about their e, s, & h will someone else - to see that light in their eyes - it's brighter than any light on a Christmas tree. To walk into my f2f home group meeting and say "I'm signed up to chair, but I got nothing tonite, it took every ounce of strength I had just to get here" and to be encircled with silent nods, compassionate eyes, gentle touches on the shoulder, meaningful hugs - it is the most ministering thing I have ever experienced.

as with on-line - to miss a few days, and to come back to find, pm's wanting to know if you are ok? what's up? pm if you need to talk?

To me, if I have the opportunity to be a part of both - then I am just opening my mind & heart for so many more ways for the program and the God of my understand to reach me.

Just sharing my e, s, & h,
Wishing you Serenity & Joy,
Rita