Fell off the wagon, OK new start
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: St. Louis Mo
Posts: 22
Fell off the wagon, OK new start
As I replied to SpaceDementia, I don't see it as a failure nor I don't want to be so harsh on myself or blame being weak minded and lack of control.
It will be a long journey. I would fall down here and there, but I know I have strengh to get up and get back on track.
My husband is really wonderful man and one of my best friend. He chose not to drink because of the temptation it might cause. He does enjoy drinking, specially Friday night. I don't want to take away one of things he enjoy.
He wanted to have a glass of wine, so I seved him. Next thing I knew, I was drinking with him.
It wasn't taste right. I didn't enjoy it but I kept on drinking. (2 glasses). Then I drank beer for couple of days, even I didn't like the taste. I have been taking herbal suppliments (Kudzu and milk Thistle - I think they help me to some extend). Then my taste bud for booze came back.
But I realized alcohol made my pain worse, ironically I started drinking to ease the pain.:rof I know it's time to start again, knowing the risk of long term use.
Sending my love to all SR familys
*BTW, what does "closed" mean on AA meeting section?
It will be a long journey. I would fall down here and there, but I know I have strengh to get up and get back on track.
My husband is really wonderful man and one of my best friend. He chose not to drink because of the temptation it might cause. He does enjoy drinking, specially Friday night. I don't want to take away one of things he enjoy.
He wanted to have a glass of wine, so I seved him. Next thing I knew, I was drinking with him.
It wasn't taste right. I didn't enjoy it but I kept on drinking. (2 glasses). Then I drank beer for couple of days, even I didn't like the taste. I have been taking herbal suppliments (Kudzu and milk Thistle - I think they help me to some extend). Then my taste bud for booze came back.But I realized alcohol made my pain worse, ironically I started drinking to ease the pain.:rof I know it's time to start again, knowing the risk of long term use.
Sending my love to all SR familys
*BTW, what does "closed" mean on AA meeting section?
...Good to know you are planning a fresh startMember
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: St. Louis Mo
Posts: 22
Onya ((((Becky)))) all part of the journey. What did you learn and what will you do differently?
Kevin
* I wrote this long reply and I lost it. Thank you everybody for your warm hearts.:ghug
Kevin- (Here is the short version. *wink)
Drinking has been a part of my life, deeply engraved in my brain. It is a strong attachment. I have to let go of it.
I love to drink on empty stomach. That's when the alcohol is the most tasty.
As it is recommended by SR, hunger and fatigue triggers the desire to drink.
I had couple incidents, all I could think of, on the way home, was icy cold beers. So I would avoid hunger and fatigue. It will be hard one too. My eating schedule is really irradic. I have had nausea ever since I was put on pain meds(narcotics), sometimes I end up throwing up, even couple sips of coffee. Meds take away appetite as well. I don't feel like eating anything till late afternoon. But since I love veggies, fruit and soups, I can nibble on them all day and later I can eat some protein and carb.
Letting my attachment go and sticking to good eating plan seem to be the key to me.
Thank you all. Have a nice day
Kevin
* I wrote this long reply and I lost it. Thank you everybody for your warm hearts.:ghug
Kevin- (Here is the short version. *wink)
Drinking has been a part of my life, deeply engraved in my brain. It is a strong attachment. I have to let go of it.
I love to drink on empty stomach. That's when the alcohol is the most tasty.
As it is recommended by SR, hunger and fatigue triggers the desire to drink.
I had couple incidents, all I could think of, on the way home, was icy cold beers. So I would avoid hunger and fatigue. It will be hard one too. My eating schedule is really irradic. I have had nausea ever since I was put on pain meds(narcotics), sometimes I end up throwing up, even couple sips of coffee. Meds take away appetite as well. I don't feel like eating anything till late afternoon. But since I love veggies, fruit and soups, I can nibble on them all day and later I can eat some protein and carb.
Letting my attachment go and sticking to good eating plan seem to be the key to me.
Thank you all. Have a nice day
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