fifty

hi everyone,

well I have come here to seek a lot of advice and tips to becoming sober. I was in a recovery group since October 31 of 2008 until I showed up there drunk last Wednesday. On thursday I cursed some people out, Friday continue my binge, Saturday partied and drove home drunk (big no no) and basically have ruined every relationship I had with my family/girlfriend, etc... This alcohol just calls my name. Not only that but I have not slept in over a month. I was taking a medication called seroquil (sp?) but drinking at the same time. The doctor told me I could have died mixing the combination of the two. I know what I'm doing is wrong but how do I stop?? Furthermore when I lay down at night I now have been having unstoppable muscle twitches. My body shakes and trembles and I cannot stop it. Plus I toss and turn and moan. I had an ultrasound done recently and the doctor said to get a second opinion b/c it looks like I have fatty deposits in my liver.

HELP! This disease is going to kill me if I do not stop soon. All the warning signs are there. I feel into a canal and broke my nose, fractured my tail bone, split my lip open and had stitches, and scarred my face up but that didn't stop me from drinking.

I appreciate all that you can help with me,

50

wjw1970

50,

I am very, very new in my recovery, so no earth shattering advice from me. I didn't want to read and run, and wanted to let you know this forum has been very helpful to me, and I hope it will be for you.

Many here have been through experiences like you describe, and have selflessly shared with newbies like myself that they understand the boozebeast, and the things they do to stay clean and away from it.

Glad to see you post, and best wishes to you.

Rowan

Hi and welcome,

Since you have already been in recovery, you likely have the tools that you need to get sober and stay that way. Are you willing to use them? This is a very supportive recovery community, and I'm glad that you found us. I hope you are able to go back to your group and take steps to get well.

parentrecovers

hey fifty, stick around! lots of nice folks here who understand. hugs, k

CAPTAINZING2000

I'd check myself into a rehab if, i were you if, you really want to stop. Then, I'd do 90 and 90.

Slow painful death for those that choose to do it by drinking until the very end.

I've always hated to see people check out that way

Rob B

I have a friend in LA, I sent him a private message. I suspect he will be contacting you.

reed

50- your story is good for me & keeping me sober. I know about those twitchy muscles, drunken bruises & accidents. It's no way to live. I suggest AA or rehab right away, maybe some prayer, a grilled cheese and tomato soup. Good support here so stick around. Remember you don't have to continue down this path.

CarolD

Welcome back!

I strongly suggest you consider a medically supervised de tox.

Then a return to whatever program
you were using.

Keep posting and keep trying,

fifty

Thank you all for your kind support and suggestions. I find now that I really need to check in with you all on a daily basis and get good follow up ideas and "will power". It's so hard not to drive down the street and pick up a bottle of booze, but it's even harder to look inside myself, realize my problem, and stop it....emphasis on STOP. My rehab group was not working and even though we were taking Urinary analysis' and breathalizers twice a week I found, or the alcoholic found, a way to get around it all. I do not need to drink to be creative, to be sociable, to go to my mailbox, to talk on the phone, etc... etc... I heard someplace that it takes 30 days to start or break a habit. So I'm going for the 30 one minute at a time and trying to interpret why I drink in the first place. I'm obviously covering up some sort of hurt.

Take care and I hope to keep in touch with you all...

fiftY

Anna

I agree with you, most addicts are covering up pain and trying to numb their feelings. That's why stopping drinking is just the beginning of the journey. There is so much more to come.

I'm glad you're going to be checking in daily!

CarolD

That sounds like a positive plan.

Add AA and see how that can benefit you.
I find it immensley helpful.

fifty

Thanks again everyone. Today I'm going on my second day of not having a drink. It's tough but will power is on my side. Take care and keep your head up!

indigo

Way to go use all your tools keep posting here, journaling is always a good idea. Keep up with your Dr appointments. Welcome to SR.

Kickit

Welcome and good luck 50.

nogard

hi fifty welcome to SR and congrats on your 2 days, sounds like you need a detox as otehrs have suggested, go see you DOc.

Kevin

GreenTea

Fifty: I believe its 30 days to establish a good habit, and only 3 days to break it or to establish a bad habit, (assuming you don't die first).

I know the following is true for me...
If you're anything like me, then perhaps its true for you too... I started drinking as a way of coping with things. But I kept on drinking because I'm an alcoholic.

jimhere

50,
I used to go to AA meetings drunk and curse people out. I was frustrated because I couldn't muster up what it took to get sober. Eventually I just gave up. That's when I got sober.

What I'm really doing here is I want to say to you that some of us here have recovered and can show you precisely how we recovered. We have an answer for you if you care to have it.

I have the same friend in L.A. that Rob is speaking of. Pm me if you want to know how to contact him. That is if he hasn't contacted you already.
Jim