Here we go again....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 16
Here we go again....
First time posting for me. I have read many of the posts and can relate to so many of you. AH is a planned binger...no alcohol for 2-3 weeks and then a night out and he comes home wasted. He used to drink 4-5 days a week but after a couple DUI's has moderated his drinking. I have been married for almost 28 years and have been going to Al-Anon 21 years. I just feel really tired and depressed from living with alcoholism. AH great guy, works hard etc. but he is compelled to drink. After his binge he is hungover and humble for a few days and then the cycle repeats itself. I am more aware of all this lately since I turned 50. I have two adult children and one 16 year old who are busy with their lives (as they should be!) but I do feel lonely in this marriage.
Sorry you are feeling lonely ((())). I can relate.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,290
Welcome.
My question is what do you want for the rest of your life? You have a long time ahead of you (God willing). Do you want to spend the next X years not liking your life? Feeling like you are throwing your years away?
I'm 53 and although was only married to my AH for 4 years, I know that I have a whole lotta life left in me and didn't want to waste it hoping that he would recognize his problems, admit to alcoholism and make my life better. I decided I deserved ever so much more than what I was facing married to a man who was content to drink his life away and sponge off me.
So what do you want for the rest of your life? Would you be better with or without him?
My question is what do you want for the rest of your life? You have a long time ahead of you (God willing). Do you want to spend the next X years not liking your life? Feeling like you are throwing your years away?
I'm 53 and although was only married to my AH for 4 years, I know that I have a whole lotta life left in me and didn't want to waste it hoping that he would recognize his problems, admit to alcoholism and make my life better. I decided I deserved ever so much more than what I was facing married to a man who was content to drink his life away and sponge off me.
So what do you want for the rest of your life? Would you be better with or without him?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Birmingham, Alabama
Posts: 44
Welcome to the board. It is a great place.
I never realized how lonely I had been in the marriage until ah left.
Now I see things for what they are. Not to say I don't miss the good times,
but I sure don't miss the drama.
Hope you find some great strength here. Keep posting!
Melissa:ghug3
I never realized how lonely I had been in the marriage until ah left.
Now I see things for what they are. Not to say I don't miss the good times,
but I sure don't miss the drama.
Hope you find some great strength here. Keep posting!
Melissa:ghug3
Progress Not Perfection
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: "Further up and further in!"---C.S. Lewis
Posts: 563
Congrats on 21 yrs of alanon!
Maybe, you are at a point in your recovery where you want something more out of life?
Maybe you are ready to take the next step?
I don't know what that step is...maybe skydiving? Extreme sports? An Italian vacation?
Learning a different language? Going on some type of retreat?
With 21yrs of alanon...you are capable of anything in life.
Maybe, you are at a point in your recovery where you want something more out of life?
Maybe you are ready to take the next step?
I don't know what that step is...maybe skydiving? Extreme sports? An Italian vacation?
Learning a different language? Going on some type of retreat?
With 21yrs of alanon...you are capable of anything in life.
yes that is what I mean......
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