PG1968

hey guys,
what's up? I am still trying to get over the loss of my my job and having to move back in with my folks, after this last relapse.... I feel like such a loser because of this. This is the same **** i had dealt with last year. I came so far, only to mess it up. I start my outpatient program this wednesday, have a sponsor, and have been going to meetings daily. was told this evening by the out patient therapist that is is time to cut out people, places , and things.. the thought of this just a painful and lonely road ahead.. we all know that this is so true. granted, I met some wonderful people at my new home group so far, but to replace those old relationships is a killer. It has now been only 7 days of sobriety, but I have come to realize (for once) that the only way to heal from this a through a spiritual path.. At least that is what I feel now, or am getting from reading the big book.This is first time I am actually taking the advice of others in the rooms? I have been usually doing things my way, to no avail.The Longest I have been sober has been three months, in like 10 years or something. I don't know what I am really trying to say.. it's just a very gray feeling right now, anxiousness, resentment, fear, anger...???? jeez.. I had it going good, for awhile, nice house, good money and job, ... now this????

barb dwyer

Hey PG -

Glad to see you're hanging in!

You know - in you first thread - I don't remember who wrote it - ut someone mentioned that having gratitude for HAVING parents to maove back in with was a good start.

So an example of the 'replacement thinking' thing might go something like -

FROM:
"oh man - I'm crap cuz I had to move back in with my folks
INTO:
"Thank (*insert Higher Power here*) I had someplace to go that isn't under a bridge!"

FROM:
"I've only got seven days"
INTO:
"Holy crap! I've been sober for a week! I've gone to meetings every day! I know I'm going to need a SPIRITUAL program ... I did this last year - and it sucked..... a SPIRITUAL program ... "


...see where I'm going?

"When I changed the way I looked at things ..
the things I looked at - changed."
That, my friend - is POWER.
And it's not ... us.

You've been somber a WEEK!
You have a roof - you are developing a home group -=
you're looking for a sponsor -
you're reading the Big Book
you've realized that it's a SPIRITUAL Disease ...

way to GO!!!!

CarolD

You may not be aware of PAWS

Post Acute Withdrawl - Relapse Prevention Specialists - TLC The Living Center

By my 3rd month of sobriety I was back
n both physical and mental balance.

Please look in your BB
bottom of pages 83-84
and know this is your future.

Let God and AA show you the way to joy!
:hug
Congratulations on your week!

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

HI PG,

Barb's right. I too lost a good paying job early in sobriety. It allowed me to focus on my recovery, and that was a good thing. Now, I'm a much better employee than I ever was..

Take this time to work on your recovery. Find your HP..everything else will fall into place.

Karen

wjw1970

Congrats on your 7 days!

Best wishes!

nodrinkingzone

I am trying to be grateful for what i have too, PG - congrats on your 7 days, and all the best with your spiritual search.

I don't know if this helps, but I decided that I needed to have a HP in my life. Even if I just pretend I'm a Jedi, and I believe in 'the force', at least it's something closer to spirituality than I had before.

I can't tell you what has happened to me, but I feel connected to the universe in a real, tangible way. It's not me, it's life itself, even if you have to make it up in order to find it.

Good luck in your quest, young padawan...

:rof

reed

its time like these when we must learn to go with the flow. best wishes in your recovery.

SF69

PG, it's great to hear you got 7 days so far, and that you are getting the help you need!

Also, I couldn't agree more with what Barb said about replacement thinking. Just thinking positively about what new, fun and exciting things out there for me now, instead of focusing on the 'good ol times' (which for the most part, really weren't that good), has given me strength that I didn't know I had.

I know it's hard right now, but it gets much better. Keep up the good work!

Tazman53

PG in sobriety I discovered a whole new world, a world full of sober freinds, not drinking buddies.

Call a friend and ask them to give you a ride to a meeting, you get a ride to a meeting!

Call a drinking buddy and ask them for a ride to a meeting!!! Unless you offer them a 6 pack you probably will not get a ride.

I have found in sobriety not only what real friends are, but also that every single thing I did while I was drinking I can still do sober with one difference..... I do them better and remember doing them the next day! I have also found that I can do a lot more things now sober that I could not do while drinking.

Trust me, my biggest fear once I knew I had no choice but to stop drinking or die was "My God if I am not drinking what am I going to do?" Today thanks to being sober the world has become my oyster!

Glad to hear you see that one needs to get spiritual to stay sober an be happy being sober.

I was one of those who had to make a choice, stop drinking and get spiritual, or keep drinking and die!

1963comet

You came back, that in it's self says something.

29a

I was laid off from my job about 4 months in. It was hard, but I survived with the help of my HP. It seemed like whenever I wasn't sure how I was going to eat or pay rent, exactly what I needed would be placed in my life, exactly when I needed it.

It was hard, but my connection to my HP was strengthened, and I didn't have to drink.

When I ask god for help, I don't always like how it/he/she decides to help me, but the results are always great.

It seems like you are on the right path, good luck my friend.

PG1968

Thank you all for those great responses. I am trying to put everything in perspective and just see where this all takes me.