HELP!

Hello. I'm new here today but found reading a couple of threads very helpful.

I am married to a potential A and I'm in the beginning stages of doing something about it. I have been a nagging partner for a long time and I've just made an appointment at a substance abuse specialized counselor for us.

Every time I try to talk my H about my his usage (beer), he denies it and leaves me feeling crazy and constantly questioning myself. I'm tired of this. I really just need some validation and support and would like any suggestions!

Thanks.

parentrecovers

Nice to meet you, Help. I'm the mom of an alcoholic/addict, so I sure understand your frustrations and concerns.

Counseling is a great start. Even if your husband is not willing to go for any reason - you can certainly go on your own. You deserve help and support.

I've been going to alanon meetings for about a year and a half. I go to one meeting weekly - it's my "home base" group. Then, some weeks I attend other meeting - time and need determined. I also have a sponsor, which for me - evolved over time.

Here's what we talk about in alanon - the 3 c's:

We didn't cause the alcoholism.
We can't cure the alcoholism or alcoholic.
We cannot control the alcoholism or the alcoholic.

We do have choices as to how we allow the disease to affect our life however. We learn to take care of ourselves.

Try a few different groups and a handful of alanon meetings before you make a decision about continuing with going. They're all a bit different.

Meanwhile, keep posting! There's also a friend and family section here to post and read in - if you have not found it already.

Blessings, K

nandm

Welcome to SR!

I see you posted in our friends and family section of the forum. There is a lot of experience, strength and hope.

Glad you are here.