TOPIC: Are You Practicing Proper Manners, Grooming In Recovery?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,238
TOPIC: Are You Practicing Proper Manners, Grooming In Recovery?
Hi Im Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.
By the Grace of my HP and people
like you here in SR I havent found
it necessary to pick up a drink
since 8-11-90.
For that an U I am truely grateful.
Im one of those ladies that is always
concerned about how i look and worry
about how others see me....judge me.
Even when i was drinking i wanted to
look and act like a lady....but slowly
i began to look and feel smash faced
as the evening progressed.
Anyway....when we were drinking many
times we could care less about our
appearances just as long the drink or
drug of choice made us feel good.
We could look and smell our worse but have
a few drinks or a drug and the way we
saw ourselves looking back at us was
so distorted..... right?
Then we walk into recovery and we
learn about change....changing our
old behaviors and ways for the better.
Today we dont have to smell bad or
look bad....we learn to dress a little
better, smell fresher.....take care of
our teeth, hair, skin...
The person in the mirror looking
back at us with some sobriety
begins to transform into a beautiful
butterfly....
Hmmmm.....guys as butterflies....lol
Well u know what i mean...
Then ur appearance and manners become
something u want to work on so u can
impress that special someone.....
Its pretty cool to sit in a meeting
and see people change right before
our eyes....
Its a new way of living in a new body
mind and soul.
Are u taking care of ur appearance, manners
now that u r clean and sober?
Thanks for letting me share.
By the Grace of my HP and people
like you here in SR I havent found
it necessary to pick up a drink
since 8-11-90.
For that an U I am truely grateful.
Im one of those ladies that is always
concerned about how i look and worry
about how others see me....judge me.
Even when i was drinking i wanted to
look and act like a lady....but slowly
i began to look and feel smash faced
as the evening progressed.
Anyway....when we were drinking many
times we could care less about our
appearances just as long the drink or
drug of choice made us feel good.
We could look and smell our worse but have
a few drinks or a drug and the way we
saw ourselves looking back at us was
so distorted..... right?
Then we walk into recovery and we
learn about change....changing our
old behaviors and ways for the better.
Today we dont have to smell bad or
look bad....we learn to dress a little
better, smell fresher.....take care of
our teeth, hair, skin...
The person in the mirror looking
back at us with some sobriety
begins to transform into a beautiful
butterfly....
Hmmmm.....guys as butterflies....lol
Well u know what i mean...
Then ur appearance and manners become
something u want to work on so u can
impress that special someone.....
Its pretty cool to sit in a meeting
and see people change right before
our eyes....
Its a new way of living in a new body
mind and soul.
Are u taking care of ur appearance, manners
now that u r clean and sober?
Thanks for letting me share.
Fighting the good fight
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 309
Yes! I have started to pay a lot more attention to how I look, how I smell, how my house looks etc.., I believe it's my self-respect, my long-buried self esteem coming back, my self-loathing slowly drying up.
It's like a bottomless pit inside me, that I tried to fill with substances, has been filled by abstinence - that I feel more whole than I ever did using or drinking.
I am very much enjoying using nice-smelling cologne, wearing nice clean clothes, sleeping in a clean bed and being told by lots of people that I'm looking really good/healthy!!
Great post again, Sharon - you're on the money today!! Thanks for sharing,
ndz
It's like a bottomless pit inside me, that I tried to fill with substances, has been filled by abstinence - that I feel more whole than I ever did using or drinking.
I am very much enjoying using nice-smelling cologne, wearing nice clean clothes, sleeping in a clean bed and being told by lots of people that I'm looking really good/healthy!!
Great post again, Sharon - you're on the money today!! Thanks for sharing,
ndz
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 55
I'm with NDZ - when you stop thinking of yourself as worthless piece of trash, it comes across in the way you look after yourself.
For me the biggest difference is that my flat is tidier and cleaner. I've never been the housewifey type, but now I actually enjoy doing laundry, baking bread and pottering around at home.
I always used to take good care of my appearance as it was a way to hide my drinking. Especially on the days that I went to work half drunk - half hungover, I put a lot of effort into making my hair, makeup and clothes look perfect, and naturally I would spray on some perfume to hide the smell
For me the biggest difference is that my flat is tidier and cleaner. I've never been the housewifey type, but now I actually enjoy doing laundry, baking bread and pottering around at home.
I always used to take good care of my appearance as it was a way to hide my drinking. Especially on the days that I went to work half drunk - half hungover, I put a lot of effort into making my hair, makeup and clothes look perfect, and naturally I would spray on some perfume to hide the smell
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,238
Great shares folks.
So much appreciated.
I recall as a child being a victim of verbal, physical,
and emotional abuse by the hand of a sick parent.
Someone whom was beautiful in her appearance but ugly
in her sickness due to her own childhood upbringing,
alcohol and presciption meds mixed together.
An eligant lady whom i admired her for her appearance.
Having worked in retail with clothes and makeup
she was always dressed to a T.
That is one thing i inherited from her.....her taste
in nice things and looking my best.
I lived with a Dr. Jeckle/ Mr Hyde personality.
Someone who appeared lovely and when her
illness surfaced she was a time bomb exploding.
Strip away the pretty clothes and makeup and all
i saw was ugliness,meaness, cruelty....
Havin grown in that disfunctional enviroment,
fear, being ridiculed by classmates all my
12 yrs in school, I eventually learned to
disquised my low self-esteem, self-worth
with makeup and clothes.
I hide my pain pretty well for many yrs....
Then i entered rehab....
I still wore a mask to cover the pain....
till eventually i was taught how to
strip away the layers of onion....as
they explained it to me....
I remember one councilor asking me to
return to group unmade...no make up
and messed up hair.....i tried but they
all knew i couldnt....humorously they
understood me....
Today I still dont feel comfortable going
anywheres not made up......even when
i worked at the grocery store in Houston,
pushing baskets in 100 degree weather...
i still worried about my looks.....
Always looking my best even today as
i continue working in customer service
at my bakery job....
I think it is important to look nice when
dealing with the public...i still like to look
nice when i go to meetings....even jogging....
No, im not one of those wash and go gals....
it takes work to look halfway descent....
But it makes me feel good....maybe because
my self-esteem is still low....I mean i believe
i am worthy of lots of things...one is to
be happy....and with working the steps
and living life in recovery i remain ever
so humble even if i love wearing lipstick
and having every hair in place.
Sure i forgot to wear my fragrance today,
and no i didnt die over it,,,, : )
Tomorrow i hope to remember as i never
leave home without it.
I know i dont have to be all made up
because i believe my HP love me unconditionally
no matter what i look like....
I think women as well as men should b admire for
all aspects of their own selves.
Today i am still a work in progress and i remain
teachable.
Thanks for letting me share.
So much appreciated.
I recall as a child being a victim of verbal, physical,
and emotional abuse by the hand of a sick parent.
Someone whom was beautiful in her appearance but ugly
in her sickness due to her own childhood upbringing,
alcohol and presciption meds mixed together.
An eligant lady whom i admired her for her appearance.
Having worked in retail with clothes and makeup
she was always dressed to a T.
That is one thing i inherited from her.....her taste
in nice things and looking my best.
I lived with a Dr. Jeckle/ Mr Hyde personality.
Someone who appeared lovely and when her
illness surfaced she was a time bomb exploding.
Strip away the pretty clothes and makeup and all
i saw was ugliness,meaness, cruelty....
Havin grown in that disfunctional enviroment,
fear, being ridiculed by classmates all my
12 yrs in school, I eventually learned to
disquised my low self-esteem, self-worth
with makeup and clothes.
I hide my pain pretty well for many yrs....
Then i entered rehab....
I still wore a mask to cover the pain....
till eventually i was taught how to
strip away the layers of onion....as
they explained it to me....
I remember one councilor asking me to
return to group unmade...no make up
and messed up hair.....i tried but they
all knew i couldnt....humorously they
understood me....
Today I still dont feel comfortable going
anywheres not made up......even when
i worked at the grocery store in Houston,
pushing baskets in 100 degree weather...
i still worried about my looks.....
Always looking my best even today as
i continue working in customer service
at my bakery job....
I think it is important to look nice when
dealing with the public...i still like to look
nice when i go to meetings....even jogging....
No, im not one of those wash and go gals....
it takes work to look halfway descent....
But it makes me feel good....maybe because
my self-esteem is still low....I mean i believe
i am worthy of lots of things...one is to
be happy....and with working the steps
and living life in recovery i remain ever
so humble even if i love wearing lipstick
and having every hair in place.
Sure i forgot to wear my fragrance today,
and no i didnt die over it,,,, : )
Tomorrow i hope to remember as i never
leave home without it.
I know i dont have to be all made up
because i believe my HP love me unconditionally
no matter what i look like....
I think women as well as men should b admire for
all aspects of their own selves.
Today i am still a work in progress and i remain
teachable.
Thanks for letting me share.
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