beardfish

Hello everyone. This is my first post here. I'm not even sure if this is the right forum for me. As I understand it, an "alcoholic" is someone who requires alcohol to function on a day-to-day basis; and a "drunk" is someone who once they begin drinking, cannot stop until they reach a satisfying point of intoxication (which is usually a ridiculous amount).
Assuming all this is true, I realize I am a "drunk". Once I start drinking I don't stop until I'm wasted. I don't need it to function in my daily life. I always think about it though. I am a normal red-blooded American male, yet I think about drinking down a 12 pack of Budweiser more than I do "T&A" if you know what I mean. I would rather sit alone and drink myself to a point of ridiculous intoxication than to get laid...(which I find weird now...) I can never stop thinking about drinking. It even haunts my dreams if I don't drink that certain night. I think the real problem is that I don't care.
I already understand and have heard a thousand times the effects of alcoholism on a person. I know that it destroys your liver, brain cells, and eventually it will destroy me. Yet, I enjoy it too much to decide to quit.
Maybe the ends justify the means for me.
I'm 22 years old right now, and I've been going to college for a few weeks now and I like it.
I just got out of a 4 year enlistment in the Marine Corps about 3 months ago. I was in the Battle of Fallujah in '04 and after that, not too much has really mattered to me. I've been drinking pretty hardcore for about 3 years now. By "hardcore" I mean about a 12-pack a night. Later on in my enlistment it became more geared towards liquor. I could polish off a bottle of Jameson no problem and go to work the next day. It got worse and worse as it went on. I got more and more depressed and the only thing I could think about was going back to my room and getting drunk at the end of the day..."self-medicating" if you will.
I have slowed down a lot since then, but I still feel the need to drink quite often. The weird thing with me is, I understand that alcohol is a problem for me...but I do not desire to quit drinking at all.
Then again, I understood that getting shot in the face could be a potential problem for me....but I still volunteered to go to Iraq.
Sorry if this post doesn't belong here. I just couldn't find any other place where there were people like me...(people who know they have a problem, but don't particularly care) and I needed some input.
So fire away...

nandm

My understanding of the difference is a drunk is an alcoholic who is still drinking and an alcoholic is a drunk who is working on recovering from their alcoholism.

That may not seem to make much sense but maybe this will help clarify it for you.
Alcohol Dependence Syndrome
The term "alcoholism" refers to a disease known as alcohol dependence syndrome, the most severe stage of a group of drinking problems which begins with binge drinking and alcohol abuse.

Types of Alcohol Problems
Alcohol problems occur at different levels of severity, from mild and annoying to life-threatening. Although alcohol dependence (alcoholism) is the most severe stage, less severe drinking problems can also be dangerous.

Binge Drinking
Officially, binge drinking means having five or more drinks in one session for men and four or more for women. Another definition for binge drinking is simply drinking to get drunk. It is the most common drinking problem for young people, under age 21.
• Binge Drinkers Have Highest Risk of Injury
• Heavy Drinking Dangers
• Brief Intervention Effective for Binge Drinkers

Alcohol Abuse
Binge drinking turns into alcohol abuse when someone's drinking begins to cause problems and the drinking continues anyway.
Alcohol abuse is when someone continues to drink in spite of continued social, interpersonal or legal difficulties. Alcohol abuse can result in missing time at school or work, neglecting child or household responsibilities or trouble with the law.

Alcohol Dependence
Alcohol abuse becomes alcohol dependence when drinkers begin to experience a craving for alcohol, a loss of control of their drinking, withdrawal symptoms

nandm

By the way.....welcome to Sober recovery....:ghug

Negative Man

Thanks for the post, beardfish. I mean this as an observation, not at all as a judgment: If you can't stop thinking about drinking, then you likely do need alcohol to function in your everyday life.

Everyone on this board has been there. So, whatever you decide for now, keep coming back here. You'll find brothers and sisters in arms and lots of support. Best wishes.

CarolD

Thank you for your service to our country.
All gave some...some gave all....

Welcome to SR!

What is your life goal?
Do you think your excessive drinking
will hinder your progress with future successes?

Are you using alcohol to cope with your Marine experiences?
My son is a 100% disabled Viet Vet
My Grandson is 50% and another is deployed in Afghanistan
None of the 3 drink or use drugs.

I'm an alcoholic in recovery ...so go figure.


No need to answer me ...
but please ask yourself these questions.

Blessings

Jersey Nonny

Well, as alcoholics come in all sizes, races, sexes, economic status, etc., so, too, does alcoholism come in different degrees of severity...periodic drinker, functional drinker, heavy drinker, problem drinker, binge drinker, falling down drunk...you name it, we've been there and/or done that.

One thing to keep in mind...it isn't how much or how often you drink, it's the effect the alcohol has on you when you do. In your case, you're mentally obsessed with alcohol; and, once you start, the physical compulsion takes over. Are you an alcoholic? Only you can answer that, and only you have the right to label yourself as such.

But, we're certainly not an exclusive group, and you'll find a lot of understanding and support among us.

Rowan

Welcome to our recovery community. I'm grateful that you found us.

lostmdboy

Welcome. I too thought of alcohol more then anything, and all the time. It absolutely controled my life, and I promiss you are just at the beginnings of you drinking carrer. If you are an alcoholic the disease will progress until it kills you. If I were you I would seriously consider quitting drinking. You are yougn and have your whole life in front of you do not let alcohol steal it from you.