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Agitated, Bored and Dying for a Drink

Old 01-11-2008, 03:43 PM
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Agitated, Bored and Dying for a Drink

I am on day 11 and I have been coping without a drink for 11 days. Today I am miserable, agitated, depressed, and don't know what to do with myself. I am bored out of my mind, and have NOTHING to do. The longest I have gone without drinking was 6 months a year-and-a-half ago, and I think the only reason it worked was because whenever I was really craving a drink, I would go shopping, not spending a lot but at least I had $20 to buy a book or shirt or something. My options: read, watch tv, and watch movies. This is what I have been doing for 11 days, and am bored out of my mind. My boyfriend is willing to go out, but where the **** do we go? What is there to do without booze? Play cards, go bowling, go out to eat...whatever. They all go with drinking. Can ANYONE give me some suggestions? What is there to do on Friday night that does not involve drinking?

:wtf2
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:48 PM
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Go to an A.A. Meeting. (just a suggestion)
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:50 PM
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Try volunteer work.

It's a fantastic way to give back, to get outside of yourself and to do something for your community. It worked wonders for me.
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:54 PM
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what about the movies?
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:55 PM
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Smile

Make love with your boyfriend (Just a suggestion)
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Old 01-11-2008, 04:34 PM
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"Agitated and bored"? Possibly! "Dying for a Drink"? Absolutely! Haven't you heard? Untreated alcoholism/addiction is a certain KILLER!!!

There is absolutely nothing you can't do without drinking...and enjoy more sober!!! Try it!!! Consider it a challenge!!!

Oh, yes...an AA meeting definitely an option.
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Old 01-11-2008, 04:49 PM
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I am an alcoholic and pill addict in recovery. I recently started dating a man who can drink socially. We do plenty that doesn't involve drinking and it's a lot of fun.
In our short time together we have gone to the movies, played Scrabble, talked for hours, watched a movie at home over pizza, and messed about on the computer together. Once you become accustomed to doing things without drinking, they become more natural. And it's great to not be hungover the next morning.
Stick around and keep posting.
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Old 01-11-2008, 04:53 PM
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Here's my $.02:

Go for a walk.
Go to the movies.
Go on a hike (depending on where you are).
Go people watch.
Sneak into a local hotel pool and go swim. Or skinny dip. Whatever.

I guess it really depends on where exactly you are. And a lot of things that are options will still have other people drinking. It's just a matter of keeping yourself separate from that element.

Best of luck! I hope you end up having a lovely evening.

B'sT
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Old 01-11-2008, 04:53 PM
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Stinking Thinking - your old thinking will take you back to another drink and then on into more crap. Some of those things you listed are fine without booze, whtas wrong with a walk a movie, go help at a soup kitchen, write a gratitude list start it with teh fact your alive and sober.

Life and love are all around us all the time its just that when we get clean our perspective slowy shifts and we see and expereience all the beauty of being.

Hang on get active don't drink and keep talking about it. Go to an AA meeting or 600 even if you hate AA. Let go of teh past and let go of your pride.

Kevin
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Old 01-11-2008, 07:05 PM
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I had the same problem, I actually asked someone at my first meeting what he does for fun. I thought it was some big secret, and he was about my age so I asked. His response? "All sorts of **** man". The next night we went to a basketball game (I hate basketball and don't know a damn thing about it but I still had fun).
Tonight I went to a meeting and hung out for a bit and then a bunch of us went to get some food and I laughed until my stomach hurt. I do other stuff that I never used to do like doing laundry, dishes, vacuuming... stuff that I never wanted to do but I knew it was the right thing to do. I find that doing things that normal people do like keeping the house in order will keep my mind busy. I go skiing, take my dog for walks, work on remodeling my house, and go to meetings. Doing "normal" chores also makes me feel like a regular person, and I find that if I see results I feel good.

The real key in the equation of finding stuff to do was going to meetings (for me at least), since I had zero friends and didn't know anyone. There was a point where I didn't even want any friends since I thought I was going to die and didn't see any use for other people. Now I actually have people calling me asking me to go hang out. If I hadn't decided I wanted help, I would have never had the added benefit of getting real friends, who help me stay sober.

It takes time to get aclimated to doing things sober that I used to do drunk. The first few times I felt really anxious and out of place, but the craziest thing was that people around me could tell, and had felt the same way before. They kept asking me if everything was OK, if I needed anything. It blew my mind that they picked up on the fact that I felt weird, and said something about it. This in itself was comforting. Now when I do start to feel uncomfortable, I'll pull someone aside and say "Hey man, I don't know what it is, but I don't feel right". Then I am reminded that this is fairly normal, and my friends will do what they can to help. I am NOT the kind of person who asks for help, but I am learning and it feels good.

This stuff is crazy, I am very grateful to FINALLY know that I am not alone, and even more grateful that I don't have to keep it to myself anymore.
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Old 01-12-2008, 09:07 AM
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This stuff is crazy, I am very grateful to FINALLY know that I am not alone, and even more grateful that I don't have to keep it to myself anymore.
UN, it sounds very much like you've captured the true essence of recovery in the rooms of AA. And, it sounds like you're enjoying sobriety...good for you!
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Old 01-12-2008, 09:11 AM
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Awesome post User!!
:ghug3

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Old 01-12-2008, 09:14 AM
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Welcome to SR...

Keep reaching out to your support systems...:ghug3

Good job on your eleven days sober...
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Old 01-12-2008, 07:48 PM
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Thanks, but I can't do it

I went 11 days and I can't do it. I fell off the wagon pretty hard, and got drunk and angry tonight. I don't know what to do. I am a bored and boring/depressed dry drunk and an angry/ upset drunk. Where to go from here....
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Old 01-12-2008, 07:55 PM
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just keep on, get rid of the booze go to sleep get up and start again, look at what your not doing that might help, get with others like you, probably easiset in a program, keep away from triggers. All it takes is the desire to stop and some action, you can do it, many others have and are your no different from them believe me.

Kevin
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Old 01-13-2008, 08:14 AM
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Originally Posted by Polkadot Girl View Post
I went 11 days and I can't do it. I fell off the wagon pretty hard, and got drunk and angry tonight. I don't know what to do. I am a bored and boring/depressed dry drunk and an angry/ upset drunk. Where to go from here....
It doesn't change overnight. I know for me, I want results and I want them yesterday. Alcohol was instant gratification, so was using drugs. Sobriety is very tough for people who want results since there is not instant gratification. There is work involved, and then results will come later. I think for me at least, this is the hardest aspect of sobriety. I am hoping and counting on the fact that this work will pay off. Just because I stopped drinking doesn't mean everything all of the sudden gets better.


Do you have any sober friends?
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