LauraSFO1

I used to fool myself into thinking I wasn't "that bad" because I could always find someone who drank much more than me. Plus, I never had a DUI, I never missed work, I never drank before evening, bla bla bla. I would compare myself to friends and associates who drank far more than me and justify myself by it.

But you know what? Someone elses drinking has nothing to do with my problem. I realized it's like being 30 pounds overweight and saying, "well, so and so is 100 pounds over weight so I'm not that bad!" But would I be happy at 30 pounds overweight? no. Would it be a problem for me? yes

So I stopped comparing. My drinking became a big problem for me. Period.

Dee74

Yeah it was a big lesson for me too. I come from a big macho drinking culture. It was very easy for me to find people 'worse' than me.

Took me years to realise - not only is what someone else does absolutely NONE of my business, but comparisions don't mean squat.

It's what my drinking does to ME that matters.

D

CarolD

I know what you mean...

I never had a DUI I was not broke.... homeless or friendless.
No one nagged me or berated my choices.

So why bother to quit?

I had come to detest the woman I was when drinking.
My body...brain....my soul was saturated with toxins.
In retrospect ...AA recovery saved my sanity.

I do hope you too will live in health and joy!

Aysha

I have seen alot of people get clean or somewhat clean and get this sense of being better than the next person. Like they all brand new.
And complete ignoramnce and arrogant attitude along with it.
I feel sorry for people like that. Because first of all...They should know better. They have been there and should know iwhat it is like to be that way.
Compassion.
Second...Looking down and comparing your acheivments to anothers flaws is just ridiculous.
Insensitive.
We have all been where they are one time or another and it aint nothing but a tiny little slip away for someone to be right back in those same shoes.

I tend to feel bad and sad for ones I see where I was and still am. My heart hurts for them. Because I know there is potential in all of us to rise above addiction and be the people we want to be.

When you start thinking you are better than a person still struggling. You are more likely to end up right back on that very same path.

KARMA!!! I believe in it with every part of me.

And itr is a pretty pathetic way to make yourself feel superior or a very insensitive way to make yourself feel better about your own recovery.

And I am not saying this what you do. I am just saying I have complete disgust for people who do this type of thing.
This is the second time I have seen this on the boards in 2 days.
It makes me sad. We should be helping one another.
Addiction is addiction. Some may be able to handle it better than others. But eventually we all fall and need a hand to help us up.

ANGELINA243

Comparing yourself to other people may seem to work for a little while--that is, until you become the person that others are comparing themselves to.

bugsworth

Laura, I hear what you are saying, thankfully all the things you listed are just "yets" for you, for me too. They will happen if we start drinking again. Comparing one self to another is very dangerous indeed. Keep going strong!

Anna

I think one of the blessings of recovery has been that I learned to never judge other people. I have more compassion for people and I think that we are all on the same road, just at different places.

Jersey Nonny

Hmmmmn...when I first started going to AA meetings, I noticed how many "went back out"...and thought, "Maybe I'm not so bad...I was able to quit...and continue going to meetings." And, then, I, too, "went back out"...briefly, but, nonetheless I relapsed.

After that, instead of comparing myself with those who were struggling, I started identifying with the winners...many who had quit, come to AA, and hung in there through thick and then...able to carry a strong, positive message of recovery to any and all who were willing to "go to any lengths".

Captain Kirk

I learnt on here not to compare myself to anybody.
What we need to do, rather then compare, is to IDENTIFY.
have a nice day.