Another text
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: In the Heart of Dixie
Posts: 128
Another text
I just got a text from Lauren, she told me she was sorry about Sunday and she hoped all was well and hoped I had a Merry Christmas. Then my niece called and Lauren texted her and told her she was sleeping in her car and was freezing so I don't know if she is telling the truth. What do I do???? She does not want any help and says she can stop on her own but we all know she can't:praying
Drug Addiction Has No Mercy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Milwaukie Oregon
Posts: 875
Remember .. she knows all your buttons to push ... Not just the ones that make you mad or hurt you .. but she also knows the ones that pull at your heart strings ...
More than likely she is sorry ...
Sorry that she is cold and sleeping in her car .. freezing her butt off (if that is even true)
You have been sticking to your guns .. which is NEW to her (she is not used to it) and is trying a different approach to get her foot back in the door .. Nothing has changed .. she is still using .. the behavior will still be there. She has no recovery under her belt and abstinence isn't recovery.
*okay here comes the lube job* ... She texted saying she is sorry about Sunday (what about all the other days she has treated you like dirt) (after threatening you repeatedly .. she now "wishes you well") and she hopes YOU have a Merry Christmas (in other words she is trying to make you feel sorry for her and make you feel guilty after all It's Christmas Time) *see the ploy here? and then the plot thickens* .. she text your niece and tells her she is sleeping in the car ... freezing .. fully knowing your niece would call you and tell you this bit of information ...
She is depending on you to break .. she is counting on you giving in ..
My suggestion to you is ... let her sit ... don't jump in and save her ..
Remember why she is there in the first place. Don't lose your focus.
Something has to change .. and it hasn't .. she hasn't .. the fact that she is a addict hasn't
Letting her come back won't change it .. it will only reinforce the behavior
You can tell her that her behavior isn't acceptable till your blue in the face, but she won't believe it until you show her that you mean it. Letting her have her way isn't meaning it. It only says she can treat you any way she wants and you'll put up with it...
She is 18 right? So you have raised her .. she is an adult .. she needs to be working and taking care of herself. You've done your job .. (now I know just cause she is 18 doesn't mean you stop loving her) but it is time she becomes responsible and starts taking care of herself. You should not have to carry the weight of taking care of an drug addicted, abusive young adult child. It is NOT okay for her to treat you the way she does (addiction or no addiction). Stand your ground and don't back down .. If you do give in you won't be saving your daughter.. you'll be rescuing her addiction.
****{Hugs}}}
Passion
More than likely she is sorry ...
Sorry that she is cold and sleeping in her car .. freezing her butt off (if that is even true)
You have been sticking to your guns .. which is NEW to her (she is not used to it) and is trying a different approach to get her foot back in the door .. Nothing has changed .. she is still using .. the behavior will still be there. She has no recovery under her belt and abstinence isn't recovery.
*okay here comes the lube job* ... She texted saying she is sorry about Sunday (what about all the other days she has treated you like dirt) (after threatening you repeatedly .. she now "wishes you well") and she hopes YOU have a Merry Christmas (in other words she is trying to make you feel sorry for her and make you feel guilty after all It's Christmas Time) *see the ploy here? and then the plot thickens* .. she text your niece and tells her she is sleeping in the car ... freezing .. fully knowing your niece would call you and tell you this bit of information ...
She is depending on you to break .. she is counting on you giving in ..
My suggestion to you is ... let her sit ... don't jump in and save her ..
Remember why she is there in the first place. Don't lose your focus.
Something has to change .. and it hasn't .. she hasn't .. the fact that she is a addict hasn't
Letting her come back won't change it .. it will only reinforce the behavior
You can tell her that her behavior isn't acceptable till your blue in the face, but she won't believe it until you show her that you mean it. Letting her have her way isn't meaning it. It only says she can treat you any way she wants and you'll put up with it...
She is 18 right? So you have raised her .. she is an adult .. she needs to be working and taking care of herself. You've done your job .. (now I know just cause she is 18 doesn't mean you stop loving her) but it is time she becomes responsible and starts taking care of herself. You should not have to carry the weight of taking care of an drug addicted, abusive young adult child. It is NOT okay for her to treat you the way she does (addiction or no addiction). Stand your ground and don't back down .. If you do give in you won't be saving your daughter.. you'll be rescuing her addiction.
****{Hugs}}}
Passion
Last edited by nytepassion; 12-18-2007 at 09:35 AM.
*~10 YEARS BABY~*
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hollywood
Posts: 9,369
Originally Posted by obsessed 
I just got a text from Lauren, she told me she was sorry about Sunday and she hoped all was well and hoped I had a Merry Christmas. Then my niece called and Lauren texted her and told her she was sleeping in her car and was freezing so I don't know if she is telling the truth. What do I do???? She does not want any help and says she can stop on her own but we all know she can't:praying
If she wants to stop on her own, she can.
Many of us before her have done it.
She's not helpless she just pretends to be.
Because she thinks she is.
Let her sleep in her car, do what she needs
to do so she can remember that she's not
helpless.
If she can sleep in a meth house, she can sleep
in a car. Don't rescue her.
Standing on her own two feet may be saving her.
:ghug
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
I agree with the above. There were many, many nights I would have loved to have HAD a car to sleep in....but it was my choice to be homeless, though I didn't realize it at the time.
She is still trying to manipulate you. The most loving thing you can do is let her fully face the consequences of her using. I know it's hard but if you bail her out this time, you will only prolong her using.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
She is still trying to manipulate you. The most loving thing you can do is let her fully face the consequences of her using. I know it's hard but if you bail her out this time, you will only prolong her using.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
remember to breathe
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: philadelphia pa
Posts: 1,280
I am the mother of a heroin addict.....
STAY AWAY FROM HER RECOVERY.... IT'S HER'S NOT YOUR'S
sorry I said it loudly but I think you need to really hear it. You could love her right into her grave by not letting her do it. When she wants help, real help, you'll know it.
STAY AWAY FROM HER RECOVERY.... IT'S HER'S NOT YOUR'S
sorry I said it loudly but I think you need to really hear it. You could love her right into her grave by not letting her do it. When she wants help, real help, you'll know it.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
