What is a dry drunk?

Old 12-17-2007, 11:54 AM
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What is a dry drunk?

People in my Alanon meetings have mentioned the term "dry drunk". What is this and what are the behaviors that go with it?


Also, how do I use the quote feature on this site? The one that puts a quote in the rectangle....thanks
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Old 12-17-2007, 11:55 AM
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I think they mean that an A is not drinking but has not really sought any treatment for the addiction. Kind of like they are white knuckling it through, which never seems to last too long.

Maybe someone can give a better insight, but that is my impression of it.
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Old 12-17-2007, 11:58 AM
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Hi Chryasalis.
Although it is a term I personally dont use, "dry drunk" is considered to be an alcohlic who has in fact stopped drinking, and that is all. Usually someone who is not working a programme, and refuses or is not ready to change themselves or their behaviour , or attitudes .

Hope this helps
HUGX
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Old 12-17-2007, 12:53 PM
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My interpretation of "dry drunk" is pretty much what Justme57 said. A person who is currently not drinking but the alcoholic behaviors continue.
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Old 12-17-2007, 01:59 PM
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Just my theory ...

And the theory is subject to change too! So many people on SR report that even after their As quit drinking, they're still SOBs. We started speculating that they were schmucks before they drank, were schmucks during, and schmucks after. Getting the picture? I wonder whether As are on some level so disturbed by their rotten personalities and acts that they anesthetize with the alcohol. So that means once the alcohol is gone, they need the therapy to become a mature, considerate, respectful person in society. If not, they're just a "dry drunk" or rather an SOB without the alcohol.

I honestly thought if my XABF would lose the booze he'd be a decent person. Now I'm thinking it wouldn't make much of a difference, except health-wise. He probably always was and probably always will be a psychopath. And that makes him toxic and someone I need to stay away from at all costs.
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Old 12-17-2007, 02:33 PM
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Go to mnnesota recovery page (dry drunk syndrome) it explains it their. it is pretty close to psycopathic.
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Old 12-17-2007, 02:49 PM
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Originally Posted by Startingover2 View Post
I think they mean that an A is not drinking but has not really sought any treatment for the addiction. Kind of like they are white knuckling it through, which never seems to last too long.

Maybe someone can give a better insight, but that is my impression of it.
That summed it up pretty well, and I can tell you from experience it's a miserable existence. Without an active program of recovery, the behavior continues. My first five months in AA were spent that way, going to meetings but not doing the work, the insanity was unbearable but it brought me to my knees and my bottom.

I really liked the way Claudia phrased it!
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Old 12-17-2007, 06:30 PM
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My exabf is a dry drunk. I'd actually have to say he's worse this way than drinking. You take the liquid away and that's it. He never changed his people, places or things. He did go to AA and got somewhat active but only because his sponsor said he wasn't doing enough. He would hang out at bars and drink O'douls and so on. His attitude STUNK, and he's depressed, financially unstable, miserable and very moody. It's not a pleasant thing to be around.

Jeeze, guess i still am bitter!!
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Old 12-17-2007, 10:37 PM
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Dry drunks are the worst. My AW is one and she is difficult to relax around. Always on edge, a little paranoid, sad, underlying anger, looking for approval and support, feeling sorry for themselves.....kind of like lost children.
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Old 12-17-2007, 11:55 PM
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My idea of a "dry drunk" is someone who is sober "for now". But is only doing it because they are forced to, not because they want to. Someone who will eventually start back up, because they are miserable without it.
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Old 12-18-2007, 01:23 AM
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www.minnesotarecovery.info./
dry drunk syndrome
reading room
recovery articles

Last edited by geees poncho; 12-18-2007 at 01:34 AM. Reason: more info
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Old 12-18-2007, 04:00 AM
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Abstinent, but not sober.

Abstinence= not drinking

Sober = not drinking AND spiritual recovery

Big difference between the two.

Dryness doesnt equal sobriety.
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Old 12-18-2007, 04:13 AM
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My STBXAH is also a dry drunk. He is a mess in oh so many ways, deep in denial and living in an alternate reality in terms of how he sees our break up and what his life is now. Nothing but excuses as to why his life is a mess (everything is someone else's fault somehow). I wonder how long it will be before he picks up thaqt bottle again.
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Old 12-18-2007, 06:47 AM
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GRANDIOSITY
JUDGEMENTALISM
INTOLERANCE
IMPULSIVITY
INDECISIVENESS
try to google it
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Old 12-18-2007, 07:37 AM
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This may offend some, but here's what I heard from a recovering A of 21 yrs!:
You take the alcohol out of the alcoholic and all you have left is the "ick." That sums it up really well for me.
(21 years of recovery left this grateful man with a wonderful outlook and sense of humor. . .)
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