guineapigjude

Kids came home from their visit with XAH today. He has been in La la land since we split, first calling me every rotten thing in the book, then insisting we had an amicable separation, telling the kids he'd always love me, sending candy, a pointsetta ....
When they came in, my daughter said her dad wanted to know if he could come in the house in a couple of weeks to bring in some "really heavy" Christmas presents. (He's not allowed on the property). He also sent in a gift wrapped box of candy, "for the house". (Did ja know the house eats candy??)
Well, I've been struggling with detaching, struggling with boundaries, and still living on eggshells where he's concerned. Always worried about his reaction and all the codie yadda yadda. But today I realized I had the power.
I went outside to the car where he was talking to the kids, and made them move out of earshot. Found out the "really big presents" he's bringing are really a bunch of small presents in big boxes to "fool" them. Told him to leave the boxes on the front steps, that I'd bring them in. When he (gosh, so concerned for me!) asked if I could manage them myself, I told him I could manage ANYTHING myself. All this conversation deadpan, no pleasant manner, no mean words. All business. He went from Mr Happy-To -See -Me to Mr Stuttering.
I came back in and remembered the candy. Out I trotted again. "I appreciate the thought, but no more presents for me". I put the candy on the car seat, turned on my heel and left without letting him say a word.
My daughter said after that he say,"Gee. It's really expensive candy!"
Can you make this stuff up???!!!
Anyway, I feel good! I dealt with him, didn't get wrapped up in drama, set my boundary, and left him to scrape his jaw off the floor.
A Christmas Miracle!!!!!!!!

ICU

That's the best feeling isn't it? Reclaiming our own power! I am woman hear me roar.....


One that you worked hard towards and are very deserving of, I'm sure!

Good for you! You done great!!

FormerDoormat

As Glinda, the good witch, told Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz:

"You always had the power, but you wouldn't have believed me. You had to learn it for yourself. Now, tap your shoes together three times and repeat after me: there's nothing like GuineaPig power, there's nothing like GuineaPig power, there's nothing like GuineaPig power....

grateful2b

:bounce wuhu,guineapig!

WantsOut

I imagine you like He-Man - holding a guinea pig over your head with both hands while lightening crackles around you, "I HAVE THE POWER!"

;P

FormerDoormat

Or "I have the power -- wheet, wheet!" Gotta love those piggies.

Kindeyes

Wahhooooo! We need to throw little parties for ourselves when we do it well! Good job! Thanks for sharing.:bounce

NoChoice

Go on girl! That is money!