reached the rock bottom
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 280
reached the rock bottom
Hi guys
I've reached the place I never thought I would. I am surrounded by beer cans and empty wine bottles and trash. I have slept for 4 days, on and off, no-one here just me. I am sitting in the corner of my couch with my last bottle of wine hoping I don't make a sound, not moving, I must be silent. ~If I'm silent I'm not really here.
I don't know what to do, who to turn to, where to go...work tomorrow and I'll never make it.
A ****** loser, everyone knows it, a sad sick bitch.
And also wallowing in my own self-pity you'll say, cos its true I know but what do I DO to change it?
Sorry..
M xxxxxxxxxxxxx
I've reached the place I never thought I would. I am surrounded by beer cans and empty wine bottles and trash. I have slept for 4 days, on and off, no-one here just me. I am sitting in the corner of my couch with my last bottle of wine hoping I don't make a sound, not moving, I must be silent. ~If I'm silent I'm not really here.
I don't know what to do, who to turn to, where to go...work tomorrow and I'll never make it.
A ****** loser, everyone knows it, a sad sick bitch.
And also wallowing in my own self-pity you'll say, cos its true I know but what do I DO to change it?
Sorry..
M xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Brighton, UK
Posts: 10
Hi
I'm new on here as well. After years of feeling sh*t about how much I drink, one morning last week I decided something had to be done. I had an especially bad hangover and was feeling unbelievably miserable and bad about myself, and I was supposed to be working from home but couldn't really do a thing.
I stumbled on this forum and decided that at least if I put a message on here I have admitted I need to change things which might spur me on to actually do something.
That was Thursday and I havent had a drink since then. In that short time I already feel so much better about myself. I have no idea how long I will stay sober, whether this 'is it' or if I'll trip up.
BTW I am from UK too - Brighton.
Would it be possible for you to try & see your doctor tommorrow for help to detox - and then maybe he can sign you off work for a bit? Then you wont have to feel so bad about missing work?
I really hope you manage to get to where you should be.
Wishing you strength.
I'm new on here as well. After years of feeling sh*t about how much I drink, one morning last week I decided something had to be done. I had an especially bad hangover and was feeling unbelievably miserable and bad about myself, and I was supposed to be working from home but couldn't really do a thing.
I stumbled on this forum and decided that at least if I put a message on here I have admitted I need to change things which might spur me on to actually do something.
That was Thursday and I havent had a drink since then. In that short time I already feel so much better about myself. I have no idea how long I will stay sober, whether this 'is it' or if I'll trip up.
BTW I am from UK too - Brighton.
Would it be possible for you to try & see your doctor tommorrow for help to detox - and then maybe he can sign you off work for a bit? Then you wont have to feel so bad about missing work?
I really hope you manage to get to where you should be.
Wishing you strength.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
Hey Mimi
good to see you - but bad you're feeling so low.
Time for action - time to leave the booze behind.
Whatever path you choose - doctor, AA, counselling, rehab, whatver - it's time to really consider that stuff, cos - it only gets worse, meems...
D
good to see you - but bad you're feeling so low.
Time for action - time to leave the booze behind.
Whatever path you choose - doctor, AA, counselling, rehab, whatver - it's time to really consider that stuff, cos - it only gets worse, meems...
D
Looking For Myself...Sober
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
Sorry your feeling like that.
But know there is always a lower low.
It only gets worse and harder.
So take the advice above and do something about it.
Wish you all the best.
But know there is always a lower low.
It only gets worse and harder.
So take the advice above and do something about it.
Wish you all the best.
member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 20
Hello Mimi,
I just started getting sober for the first time in my life almost a month ago and I can tell you as much as I am confused and sometimes frustrated it is much better than sitting in a room staring at empties and feeling down.
I wish you luck.
I just started getting sober for the first time in my life almost a month ago and I can tell you as much as I am confused and sometimes frustrated it is much better than sitting in a room staring at empties and feeling down.
I wish you luck.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 280
Thanks for your support guys. I knew I'd get it here...
Things I'm thinking...how do I get through xmas? Our company party next week? That fitting in thing?
I feel like I'm losing the only way I know how to socialise....I work in an industry where drinking is huge and difficult to avoid without it being really obvious.
I'm not trying to find excuses, just saying the facts..
M xx
Things I'm thinking...how do I get through xmas? Our company party next week? That fitting in thing?
I feel like I'm losing the only way I know how to socialise....I work in an industry where drinking is huge and difficult to avoid without it being really obvious.
I'm not trying to find excuses, just saying the facts..
M xx
Raised from the Dead
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Chicago
Posts: 376
ahhh the bitter bitter bottom....i remember every single day oh so well. i was 25, living under a viaduct, drinking king cobra, and talking to myself. homeless in the artic winter....lonely, scared, hopeless, and suicidal...
there is much hope for you! we all need to be brought to our knee's for us to ask for help. find yourself a detox facility and then make a meeting and ask for help. a path will be laid out for you.
always remember that without the bitter the sweet wouldnt be so sweet!!!!
there is much hope for you! we all need to be brought to our knee's for us to ask for help. find yourself a detox facility and then make a meeting and ask for help. a path will be laid out for you.
always remember that without the bitter the sweet wouldnt be so sweet!!!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: NY
Posts: 179
Originally Posted by mimi54321 
Thanks for your support guys. I knew I'd get it here...
Things I'm thinking...how do I get through xmas? Our company party next week? That fitting in thing?
I feel like I'm losing the only way I know how to socialise....I work in an industry where drinking is huge and difficult to avoid without it being really obvious.
I'm not trying to find excuses, just saying the facts..
M xx
Things I'm thinking...how do I get through xmas? Our company party next week? That fitting in thing?
I feel like I'm losing the only way I know how to socialise....I work in an industry where drinking is huge and difficult to avoid without it being really obvious.
I'm not trying to find excuses, just saying the facts..
M xx
Something that I hear and remind myself of every single day: One day at a time. Don't worry about tomorrow, just don't drink today and when tomorrow comes then deal with it. Good luck, you don't have to feel like crap all the time, there is a solution. AA seems to work well for me, maybe give that a try?
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
Nobody can make you drink and you never have to drink.
I'm a musician - I can't imagine that's any less difficult than your job in respect to drinking socialising and peer pressure.
The bottom line is what you want to do more - not drink or fit in.
You've been here a while. It's pretty clear you, like the rest of us, can't drink only sometimes.
There's a choice here Mimi.
D
I'm a musician - I can't imagine that's any less difficult than your job in respect to drinking socialising and peer pressure.
The bottom line is what you want to do more - not drink or fit in.
You've been here a while. It's pretty clear you, like the rest of us, can't drink only sometimes.
There's a choice here Mimi.
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 280
Originally Posted by Dee74
Nobody can make you drink and you never have to drink.
I'm a musician - I can't imagine that's any less difficult than your job in respect to drinking socialising and peer pressure.
The bottom line is what you want to do more - not drink or fit in.
You've been here a while. It's pretty clear you, like the rest of us, can't drink only sometimes.
There's a choice here Mimi.
D
I'm a musician - I can't imagine that's any less difficult than your job in respect to drinking socialising and peer pressure.
The bottom line is what you want to do more - not drink or fit in.
You've been here a while. It's pretty clear you, like the rest of us, can't drink only sometimes.
There's a choice here Mimi.
D
Sorry for sounding like a broken record.
M
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
oh don't be sorry Mimi....I sometimes get a little blunt, but I really should have a serious sig one of these days...'I've been there' or something....
I was exactly where you are...for 15 years really all up.
No-one wants to be an alcoholic.
It's really hard to accept and really hard to change your lifestyle to make recovery fit.
But it really is worth it...I could only dream of my life now 8 months ago.
D
I was exactly where you are...for 15 years really all up.
No-one wants to be an alcoholic.
It's really hard to accept and really hard to change your lifestyle to make recovery fit.
But it really is worth it...I could only dream of my life now 8 months ago.
D
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