Lots On My Mind
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: DUBLIN, GA
Posts: 35
Lots On My Mind
HELLO SR FAMILY.
I AM SITTING AT WORK RIGHT NOW JUST THINKING ABOUT ALL THE DRAMA I HAVE HAD TO DEAL WITH IN THE PAST FEW MONTHS. LIKE I POSTED ON ANOTHER THREAD, MY HUSBAND AND I ARE SEPERATED BECAUSE OF HIS LIES AND DRUGS USE. I AM JUST WISHING TIME WOULD GO FASTER AND I COULD SEE WHAT CHOISES HE IS GOING TO MAKE IN THE FUTURE. HE TOLD ME TODAY HE WAS GOING TO FIND ANOTHER JOB AFTER CHRISTMAS. HE HAS CHANGED HIS CELL NUMBER SO HIS CONTACTS CANT CALL HIM ANYMORE. HE WANTED HIS FAMILY BACK AND HE WANTS ME BACK.
I JUST WISH I KNEW HOW THIS IS GOING TO END UP. I WANT TO KNOW NOW IF HE IS SINCERE ABOUT WHAT HE SAYS. THIS "WAITING" IS THE WORST PART FOR ME. I WAS JUST WONDERING HOW DO YOU GET THREW THESE DAYS. HE HAS BEEN CLEAN A WEEK NOW AND I JUST WONDER IF ITS GOING TO BE FOR REAL NOW.
WE HAVE HAD THESE SAME CONVERSATIONS IN THE PAST. AND HERE WE ARE AGAIN HAVING THE SAME ONE AGAIN. SO IF ANYONE IN MY SHOES CAN GIVE ME SOME INSIGHT OR ADVISE ON HOW TO DEAL WITH TIME PASSING AND DEALING WITH MY STRESS OF WORRY.
:praying
I AM SITTING AT WORK RIGHT NOW JUST THINKING ABOUT ALL THE DRAMA I HAVE HAD TO DEAL WITH IN THE PAST FEW MONTHS. LIKE I POSTED ON ANOTHER THREAD, MY HUSBAND AND I ARE SEPERATED BECAUSE OF HIS LIES AND DRUGS USE. I AM JUST WISHING TIME WOULD GO FASTER AND I COULD SEE WHAT CHOISES HE IS GOING TO MAKE IN THE FUTURE. HE TOLD ME TODAY HE WAS GOING TO FIND ANOTHER JOB AFTER CHRISTMAS. HE HAS CHANGED HIS CELL NUMBER SO HIS CONTACTS CANT CALL HIM ANYMORE. HE WANTED HIS FAMILY BACK AND HE WANTS ME BACK.
I JUST WISH I KNEW HOW THIS IS GOING TO END UP. I WANT TO KNOW NOW IF HE IS SINCERE ABOUT WHAT HE SAYS. THIS "WAITING" IS THE WORST PART FOR ME. I WAS JUST WONDERING HOW DO YOU GET THREW THESE DAYS. HE HAS BEEN CLEAN A WEEK NOW AND I JUST WONDER IF ITS GOING TO BE FOR REAL NOW.
WE HAVE HAD THESE SAME CONVERSATIONS IN THE PAST. AND HERE WE ARE AGAIN HAVING THE SAME ONE AGAIN. SO IF ANYONE IN MY SHOES CAN GIVE ME SOME INSIGHT OR ADVISE ON HOW TO DEAL WITH TIME PASSING AND DEALING WITH MY STRESS OF WORRY.
:praying
From my own personal experience .. I got through the waiting in suspense time by taking care of me and doing what was in my best interest .. I plunged into my own recovery on a deeper level ... (I no longer sat around waiting for him/his actions to determine my happiness or permit him to hold the fate of my future in his hands) I did things to my benefit and in my best interest to ensure that no matter what he did or didn't do I WAS GONNA BE OKAY REGARDLESS. Unfortunately my ex didn't remain clean .. fortunately I had been at the gym *so to speak* training, lifting weights .. gaining my strength and getting fit so that when his addiction reared its ugly head I wasn't taken out by the blow ... Granted my world was shaken but not destroyed .. When he fell I didn't go down with him ... I stood my ground firmly and carried on...
The best gift you can give to yourself is getting into and working your own recovery. We are only as strong as our recovery is .. "work it" if and when everything around seems to be falling to the ground YOUR HOUSE WILL STAND FIRM.
Take care of YOU *ain't nobody else gonna do it for you* and if he can't back up his words with actions you will still be standing.
******{hugs}}}}
Passion
The best gift you can give to yourself is getting into and working your own recovery. We are only as strong as our recovery is .. "work it" if and when everything around seems to be falling to the ground YOUR HOUSE WILL STAND FIRM.
Take care of YOU *ain't nobody else gonna do it for you* and if he can't back up his words with actions you will still be standing.
******{hugs}}}}
Passion
Lita, what Moose suggested works for me. Go to a meeting, call a friend and go for coffee or lunch, take a long walk and notice what is around you, read a good book that will take your mind some place else, start a craft project, volunteer at a hospital or at a women's shelter, lord knows they need the help. I think you get the gist.
The more I did good things for me, the less I obsessed about my addict son and the better I felt.
Hugs
The more I did good things for me, the less I obsessed about my addict son and the better I felt.
Hugs
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