The time is ticking...
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,290
Sorry you are going thru all this. Please do think of yourself and your daughter. You both deserve much better than life with an alcoholic. You do not want her growing up thinking alcoholism is normal, learning the codependent behaviors.
That is one of the physical signs of excessive alcohol consumption.
Originally Posted by gravelgirl66 
his dad, their "face" looks the same... I think that its high blood pressure or something, cause they are beat red... my bf's is too... its always like that...
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Join Date: Jan 2006
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Posts: 6,278
Sorry you are going through this. It is very sad. It takes courage and strength to do what is best for your child. I am very proud of you for doing that. I wish my mother would have had those qualities. My life may have turned out quite differently.
A couple of things kind of jumped out at me, though.
It was very difficult for me, but I had to dig deep into myself and figure out why an active alcoholic was "everything I could ever want."
So, both the important, serious relationships you have had have been with addicts? The other thing both of those relationships had in common is you.
It might be time to stay away from relationships for a little while and develop one with yourself. Maybe get a therapist or do some reading on codependency. Both have been very enlightening for me.
Best wishes,
L
A couple of things kind of jumped out at me, though.
Originally Posted by gravelgirl66
In my heart, he is everything I could every want... I melt when I look at him... He is the "other guy" at night, and I have my adoring man in the mornings... He's not mean or anything like that... he's just diffrent... if that makes sense...
Originally Posted by gravelgirl66
I found what I wish could have happended to me me years ago... what I have waited for, and its another person with an addiction... GD.. that makes me so mad! I hate this.. I hate alcohol, I hate drugs... I hate lying...
As George says, "I hate Everything" -
As George says, "I hate Everything" -
It might be time to stay away from relationships for a little while and develop one with yourself. Maybe get a therapist or do some reading on codependency. Both have been very enlightening for me.
Best wishes,
L
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 151
I completely get where you are. My AH still melts my heart every time I see him, even after almost 11 years together. He is wonderful in so many ways, but is definitely, forever and always, an alcoholic. This fact burns me to no end, and I'm also trying my best to "make it through til January" when I'll supposedly get the guts to end it. The most I can tell you right now is this: If I can find an inner peace, a feeling of having a SELF or some serenity while I'm living with him now - I have to believe that I will be amazing when it's just me. Right? 
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